Mature-Age-Gays who blindly married Women decades ago

[Gentleheart]

I know there are still plenty of girls/women who purposely get knocked up to 'catch a man'.

lol well, the jokes on them because the moniker deadbeat dad isn't in vogue again for naught.

 

[pat grimshaw]

...I know there are still plenty of girls/women who purposely get knocked up to 'catch a man'.

And Buzzer et.al. says it's OK for the man to inseminate the woman and then leave. He says it's society's job to act as the co-parent for single mothers.

I reckon gay men should stay with the wife until their child is of age.

 

[xbuzzerx]

And Buzzer et.al. says it's OK for the man to inseminate the woman and then leave.

Do not presume to speak for me and do not make posts proclaiming "what buzzer thinks", particularly when you are so flatly lying. I have never said any such thing, and only by your usual intentionally dishonest creative quoting where you leave out key words or edit the quote to say something entirely different from what it actually said could you possibly claim that.

 

[Gentleheart]

And Buzzer et.al. says it's OK for the man to inseminate the woman and then leave.

LOL! you are something else.

 

[ElmosToe]

^could be trolling.

 

[medic1]

^Or fapping.

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

okay mars colony is ya alls weed da 1 kilometa high shrinks wrap book on wot a man ans woman ans ya up a speed?
_ yea_
" 1 Q? "
gah is alway 1
_ well_
" yea we a alls wanna nose is okay takes teddys "
GAH

luv 1st world


thankyou

 

[peeonme]

I reckon gay men should stay with the wife until their child is of age.

I reckon that men, be they gay or straight should run their own lives, we don't know the details of someone's life, but it sure seems that everyone knows what the other guy should do.

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

ha planet nose wot human apes cans a do but

thankyou

haaaa

 

[dpnice]

I reckon that men, be they gay or straight should run their own lives, we don't know the details of someone's life, but it sure seems that everyone knows what the other guy should do.

I agree with this comment basically due to the fact that the majority of us do not have an in depth experience of such "marriages" and are really commenting from our own personal feelings on the subject and some occasional encounters with married gay guys.

 

[aaggii]

I think that's a modern and largely western notion, and relatively new as something every individual person expects. Marriage traditionally (and still, in many parts of the world) has been about connecting two families in a way that was somehow socially advantageous. You think people in arranged marriages, even if both were straight, were in love or even necessarily wanted to touch each other? Or even in a more contemporary example in our own culture, celebrity sham marriages, which I suspect happen a great deal more than is probably generally known, but helps both of their careers.

I'm merely pointing out that marriages to fit social expectations being blamed as something unique or definitive to closeted (or non-closeted) gay men marrying women is unsupportable.

Are you serious? Are we crying now over people with money who lie the sad audience that gets its thrills from other peoples´ lives?

Have you read my posts from the 1st page? I already wrote about arranged marriages and that was not the point. For the 4th time (or so), I am talking about 30 to 50 men in civilized countries who, in spite of being able to choose to fight for their rights or even to stay single, decided to marry women in order to fit in and make mommy and daddy happy. It still happens.

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

wen read this thread like a many threads twits or woteva is ya see why great lands cream a soup elites a eons go repeat evary day
_ da planet is round taday cause_
* urm is it not flat? *
_ wot? teys voters? -
% dunno but betta ya nose %
-betta check again _
next bit
! da next day !
_ in FACT it a round cause _
Urrrrrrrm wot about flat bits?
_ WOT?


haaaaaaa

 

[Gentleheart]

I agree with this comment basically due to the fact that the majority of us do not have an in depth experience of such "marriages" and are really commenting from our own personal feelings on the subject and some occasional encounters with married gay guys.

Well, in that case...no one should ever comment on anything that they haven't personally been through. haha...right. The world doesn't work that way.

Just because people feel some kind of way about this topic, doesn't mean everyone should tip toe around it.

What I'm reading from some of you is you've never married a woman to put on an appearance, so you can't have an opinion on doing such a thing.

 

[ElmosToe]

^agrees with GH.

 

[peeonme]

Well, in that case...no one should ever comment on anything that they haven't personally been through. haha...right. The world doesn't work that way.

Just because people feel some kind of way about this topic, doesn't mean everyone should tip toe around it.

What I'm reading from some of you is you've never married a woman to put on an appearance, so you can't have an opinion on doing such a thing.

I agree with you, we all comment on situations that we have never been in. I wouldn't want someone to feel compelled to tiptoe around a topic, why have a hot topics forum if we do that?

I would only suggest that we refrain from assuming why a gay man ends up married to a woman, not all who have done it have planed to live a "lie" or use the woman to hide their gayness, I am sure that some have done this.

When a man who has married finally comes to grips with the fact that he is gay, there are many things that he has to take in to account:
Does he plan on practicing gay sex?
Does he plan on moving on with his life?
Where is he at in his hetero marriage? (is it on the rocks?)
What effect would telling his wife that "oops, I was gay, my bad, you don't mind, do you?" have on his wife? Could she handle it emotionally?

It's so easy for the cheer leaders to wave their pompoms and tell a guy to fess up and quit lying, and for some guys it is quite easy to
let her know she picked the wrong man and walk out.

For some, there is genuine love, love for a woman who has brought your son into the world, cooked your meals, washed your clothes,
put up with a dumb ass attitude all to often.

Personally, I will live with any guilt that comes for not being totally honest, I will take my lumps, but I won't let my wife in on any pain,
that would be my turf if I go on a guilt trip someday.

So, fine, lets discuss this all we want, but please understand that not all married gays set out to deceive their wives, most of us set out on a course of self deception way before we married.

 

[mikey3000]

^ Bravo!!!
People can change over time, and for many different reasons. Sexual fluidity. But instead of judging us guys with wives, how about ASK us what happened and how we ended up married to women. There are lots of us on here. I am very lucky that, after I came out to my wife right at the beginning of my attraction to men, we vowed to work it out. We came to new terms in our marriage that were acceptable to both, and discovered a whole new and exciting dimension to our sexualities. But not every marriage would survive that. So I learned to not judge others in their relationships. Gay, straight or bi, no partnership is perfect, but at least paradigms are shifting.
Peeonme...my hats off to you, sir. I couldn't do what you do. I wish you and your wife all the best!!

 

[xbuzzerx]

Are you serious? Are we crying now over people with money who lie the sad audience that gets its thrills from other peoples´ lives?

Have you read my posts from the 1st page? I already wrote about arranged marriages and that was not the point. For the 4th time (or so), I am talking about 30 to 50 men in civilized countries who, in spite of being able to choose to fight for their rights or even to stay single, decided to marry women in order to fit in and make mommy and daddy happy. It still happens.

Yes, I am serious. Your consistent criticism of these marriages is that the woman is getting "used." There are many marriages where one or both partners are being "used" for something, depending on your point of view, including an enormous number of heterosexual ones. I also think you are assigning to all women a position of being some kind of passive, clueless victim in all of these scenarios, as if no straight woman married to a gay man ever knew it. If we believe what we hear at JUB, plenty of wives know it, some of them even up-front. The fact that marriage really comes down to nothing other than a legal agreement between two people for a very wide variety of purposes, not all of them being love or childrearing, all you have done in this thread is impose your personal idea of what a "true marriage" should be and then attacked other marriages for deviating from it. And if you think there is any one universally shared idea of what a "true marriage" is then you don't know what you're talking about.

 

[LeicsDom]

Gay rights and acceptance have progressed quite a bit in the last twenty or so years. Perhaps at this point, more people can embrace who they really are, and live their lives on their own terms.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again...life is too fucking short to live it by someone else's standards and expectations. I can't help but feel terribly for anyone so worried about society's views that they put themselves into a (near-)permanent situation of denying who they are and/or deceiving someone else.

I agree but there are still huge swathes of not only Third World countries but Western civilisation that are so intolerant. Until we can educate everyone to a high standard and abolish organised religion there will be many people who will feel trapped by their peers' opinions

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

ife is too fucking short to live it by someone else's standards and expectations. I can't help but feel terribly for anyone so worried about society's views that they put themselves into a (near-)permanent situation of denying who they are and/or deceiving someone else


? evary a great nice supa culture on planet is fa eons a builds ons
ans stuff ans mor stuff ans stuff
ans ----- deny ans decieve ans death ---- fa eons
anyway sure great public world ova etc so on ans enjoy da carrots
_ans UN fa always pretty flags a blowins ins winds out a debatin big room_
get wiffy ins da BIG ROOM

anyway

wondafurfulls

thankyou

 

[aaggii]

Yes, I am serious. Your consistent criticism of these marriages is that the woman is getting "used." There are many marriages where one or both partners are being "used" for something, depending on your point of view, including an enormous number of heterosexual ones. I also think you are assigning to all women a position of being some kind of passive, clueless victim in all of these scenarios, as if no straight woman married to a gay man ever knew it. If we believe what we hear at JUB, plenty of wives know it, some of them even up-front. The fact that marriage really comes down to nothing other than a legal agreement between two people for a very wide variety of purposes, not all of them being love or childrearing, all you have done in this thread is impose your personal idea of what a "true marriage" should be and then attacked other marriages for deviating from it. And if you think there is any one universally shared idea of what a "true marriage" is then you don't know what you're talking about.

Poor rich gay guys doing it for the audience, they must have it so bad. Bho, everyone is a victime today.

A simple read of my post will show you how wrong you are: I wrote about many types of marriage. My problem is - I´ll probably get banned for saying this for the millionth time - men from their 30s to 50s in developped countries.

When did I ever say that women play the clueless idiots? Of course, some might know. Some DO know. But some don´t. If they like the situation and don´t do anything about it, though for them, they are as much to blame for their lack of happiness in their lives as their husbands, but I was clearly talking about the wives who don´t know, who are lied, therefor used for appearances and nothing more. I would like to have the type of wife that I am talking about, here with us to tell us their version and bring some light here.

And yes, I do believe that a true marriage as you call it, should be two people being together for love and nothing more. Sure as hell I attack any other forms of it. Are you telling me you´re ok with - just 2 examples - trading a daughter for goats to make her the 10th wife of someone or arranging marriages for pretty much kids just so that the wealth can stay in the family? Come on...