me coming out to my friend

[G-Lexington]

You have fun with that.

Lex

 

[swarley]

well that was... different. you strike out with one guy and suddenly all guys are bad? Are you really giving up on guys just because you had one bad experience? i don't think you know what you want right now so i think you should be open to anything until you can figure out what you truly want. don't rule out one or the other.

 

[Lube]

he repied "it's weird you told me at the wrong time" I repied " yeah sorry but i just had to tell you..." he repied " you shouldn't have told me" I sharply said "would you have preferred if I was FAKE around you!" he didnt answer so i said subtly "i had to tell you, i couldnt compress my feelings any longer im sorry" and in a sharp tone he said "you still shouldn't have told me...Im Gone..." and he logged off. so... i guess thats it

Others will disagree, but I think this means he's not comfortable with himself yet. He may be gay and he may have feelings for you, but if he does, he has to deal with coming out to himself first. It sounds to me like he's not there yet. He may never be there.

You have to walk away until he shows some interest. Which may be never.

Just read all the messages on JUB--there are lots of guys who are looking for a relationship. You just have to go and find them.

Are you comfortable coming out to more people?

Good luck.

 

[gameaddict]

Others will disagree, but I think this means he's not comfortable with himself yet. He may be gay and he may have feelings for you, but if he does, he has to deal with coming out to himself first. It sounds to me like he's not there yet. He may never be there.

You have to walk away until he shows some interest. Which may be never.

Just read all the messages on JUB--there are lots of guys who are looking for a relationship. You just have to go and find them.

Are you comfortable coming out to more people?

Good luck.

yeah you're probably right... and yeah i'm very uncomfortable coming out to people... i'll just have to wait and see what happens with my friend but now I miss him as a friend (i havent spoken to him since asking him)

 

[gameaddict]

well that was... different. you strike out with one guy and suddenly all guys are bad? Are you really giving up on guys just because you had one bad experience? i don't think you know what you want right now so i think you should be open to anything until you can figure out what you truly want. don't rule out one or the other.

i'll keep the "guy" option open but rejection after rejection isn't good for my confidence I need to find out which i feel more emotional with and horny with whether it be male or female

 

[gameaddict]

You have fun with that.

Lex

oh yeah and Lex sorry for lashing out on you a while back I'm usually a nice guy but at the time I was angry and... dissapointed so I'm sorry for that

 

[gameaddict]

after i told him i liked him he always treated me weirdly and i just wanted to clear it up whether he wanted to do something with me or not, he didnt even give me a yes or no and to be honest if i were in his shoes i wouldnt have turned down my best friend in such a cruel way. but you know what forget it all this gay business is starting to put me off men; eating cum, sucking dick, rimming, it all sounds nasty to me. i'd only ever fuck a guy, kiss, jack off with and just play with each other with a guy. but hey im still young and im gonna take a break from boys and get a girl

hey I'm sorry if I offended anyone with this message it's just I don't quite feel ready for all of that with a guy yet...i'll keep the "guy" option open...

 

[m59583]

Whenever you feel the urge to get pissed off about this situation, just go masturabte about 30 times in a row. That should keep you busy for a while.

Seriously though, if guys throw you through a loop this easily, you need to step back and examine yourself. It's not what you want all the time.

And you're not getting the point that everyone else has said---he's not interested in you. Quit lying to yourself and making up grand stories that he is. Get over yourself and more importantly, get over him.

Next!

 

[gameaddict]

Whenever you feel the urge to get pissed off about this situation, just go masturabte about 30 times in a row. That should keep you busy for a while.

Seriously though, if guys throw you through a loop this easily, you need to step back and examine yourself. It's not what you want all the time.

And you're not getting the point that everyone else has said---he's not interested in you. Quit lying to yourself and making up grand stories that he is. Get over yourself and more importantly, get over him.

Next!

oh I'm over him, its just now I miss him as a friend. and its not what I want all the time lol It's just the other person never makes any effort or really opens up to me so i have to do all the work! they always wanna hear about me, they never wanna tell me anything about themselves and it frustrates me, i want someone to feel like they can talk about anything with me and feel good about it...

 

[Lube]

Don't worry, you'll find other friends. Good friends are hard to come by, but keep your chin up.

 

[m59583]

I might sound a bit condescending here, but I'm asking an honest question: have you ever just gone out and said "So, tell me a little bit about yourself--what types of music do you like, what movies do you like, etc" Don't start out too deep or you'll frighten people away.

It helps to take things one step at a time---if you feel like you're always the one who's answering, then maybe you should step up your game and ask more questions. Just don't ask too many too quickly. Trust, and love and companionship more importantly, take time to build and maintain.

I went out with this guy not too long ago who seemed to be overly clingy too quickly--he hastily decided to give me a gift. While I appreciated the gift, I knew that there was a high probability that things WEREN'T going to work out. Why? He went on a very quick whim to make the decision to give me not one but TWO cards that were full of sappy love notes. It scared me a little bit, and so I slowly (or rather abruptly, depending on how one would look at it) weaned myself off of him after a period of about a month. I don't want a lifetime commitment only after knowing a guy for a month! As I said before, giving out too much info too early, or vocalizing or writing a desire to make a lasting committment too early will scare a lot of people, gay or straight.

Take your time....and go with the flow of life. Rushing to anything will usually have you tripping over your own feet and smacking your face against the concrete.

 

[Jo-thin]

oh woah, this thread is making me think twice about coming out to a guy i like. Someone in my thread said something like gay guys take flirting too seriously. Sometimes straight guys do just joke around like that.
I'd suggest if you want to keep him as a friend, give him more space and to not bring up the issue again.
It started off harmless with you telling him how you feel, he was shocked and needed space, and evidently gave you his answer when he didn't bring it up again and a lack of response. But then you kept pushing it. You should have just respected him and left it alone bud.

Well the thing is how close are you to em!?
I came out to a friend. Ive only known him for a year if not less. And he is onr of ths straightest guys I know!
I thought he was gay n boom he wasnt but he still accepted me cause of trust! I felt like the timing was right!
You can't just shove it in their face "HEY I'M GAY AND I LIKE YOU"!
That will scare a straight man away! being Patient is always good

 

[rareboy]

they always wanna hear about me, they never wanna tell me anything about themselves

Are you sure about this?

Or is it just your own perception that you are the focus of all attention?

 

[gameaddict]

thanks for all the advise on my friend but we havent seen each other since july (ive messaged him many times but i get ignored...) im getting more confident talking to gays/bi's however...and im working on getting a man and M5.... i did build up VERY slowly and i often lose love by taking to long...i'll keep you updated on my love life lol feel free to offer advise and tips and point out what i did wrong with this guy lol

I'm Out

GameAddict

 

[gameaddict]

It's good to be back JUB members! I'm gonna update ya with whats been happening in my sex life...lol

Well I'm going to a new college now and I've made a few friends...one of them I found out is gay so I started talking with him and made friends with him and eventually told him I'm bi but I don't like him (sexually) and after knowing each other for a week he told me he "kinda" liked me... I was flattered but I told him I only see him as a friend and he acted as if he was cool with it... until I got a girlfriend ,which he got really jealous of and broke us up... I weren't to bothered about the girl but by the fact that he broke us up and then I went crazy on him and told him straight that "I didn't f**kin like him". Then he started threatning me saying that he would make my life at my college hell and he would expose that I'm bi... I called him immediately I told him that he's sad and immature and then he started saying that hes " gonna do something stupid" I ignored him and what do ya know he was in college the next day. I kinda want advise on how to deal with these sorta people abit better...