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Meeting other gay Teens

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ToolFan24

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So i am currently a university Freshmen, right around the DC area. Recently out to some family, but not all. I have been attending meetings and discussions held specifically for lgbt students. However, I feel like a fish out of water in any of these environments, because the overwhelming majority of gay students i meet are highly feminine. I am not feminine in any way, so i find it difficult to connect with the other students. I guess i could be considered your typical "straight appearance" gay. People generally do not believe me when i tell them i am gay. I am finding it increasingly difficult to meet others i can identify with, and i'm starting to get depressed about it. Any suggestions?
 
you could drop the pre-concieved notion that you can't be friends with anyone that acts in a way that you would categorize as feminine and actually try talking to them... ..|
 
It is not that i am unwilling to interact with them. I have made friends with a good number of them, and they are great people. I am speaking more on a level of potential relationship. I find it very difficult to be attracted to a fem gay because it is something i don't understand or possess.
 
Okay, I know where you're getting at. There's another thread in this forum that is very similar and you may find it helpful to read, though I hope you're a bit more open-minded about it.
There are plenty of guys who don't look or seem gay at first look because they don't show feminine attitudes. However, everybody man or woman has a feminine part, that in the case of men is usually overshadowed. Not all but several teenagers, who come out, overexpose this femininity as a way of freeing their feelings, which is not wrong in any way it's just a point I'm making because I think explains why you can't find an equal in those meetings. There are also clubs which have a certain tendency to specific music and people who get together there, don't you think you may be looking in the wrong places? i.e, where I live there are clubs for "bears" which doesn't mean you are not going to find effeminate guys there, but is less likely, there are other clubs for younger guys, other for people who enjoy madonna, lady gaga and that stuff, there are others for people who'd rather have some drinks and a chat with somebody, etc.
I get what you say because as you do I like men because they're men and even though there's nothing wrong about being effeminate, it doesn't appear attractive to me. Therefore, I recommend you to take a second and deeper look at the places you hang out and see how it goes. Don't get frustrated and depressed, the ones you're looking for ARE there, most of times are just more difficult to spot.

best of luck.
 
ToolFan24 said:
It is not that i am unwilling to interact with them. I have made friends with a good number of them, and they are great people. I am speaking more on a level of potential relationship. I find it very difficult to be attracted to a fem gay because it is something i don't understand or possess.
Click to expand...

They'll know people who know people. It's all about networking. Be the token butch in a whole gang of queens, and you'll stand out.

Careful, though. You may find yourself picking up some of their mannerisms.
 
ToolFan24 said:
So i am currently a university freshman, right around the DC area. Recently out to some family, but not all. I have been attending meetings and discussions held specifically for lgbt students. However, I feel like a fish out of water in any of these environments, because the overwhelming majority of gay students i meet are highly feminine. I am not feminine in any way, so i find it difficult to connect with the other students. I guess i could be considered your typical "straight appearance" gay. People generally do not believe me when i tell them i am gay. I am finding it increasingly difficult to meet others i can identify with, and i'm starting to get depressed about it. Any suggestions?
Click to expand...

I think I might understand. You seem frustrated and disappointed that you haven't met gay boys like yourself, i.e. "regular dudes", masculine, maybe athletic, not swishy. The fact that you're not finding what you are looking for is not uncommon. My quick advice to you is to make friends with the swishy boys. They'll help you find other dudes. The more gaydar the better. They could investigate possibilities for you if you're really friends with them.

There are "straight-acting" boys who need to be found. Not everyone is going to go to the lgbt meetings.

When I was in college, two of my best friends were into having sex with me. They both had girlfriends and didn't know that they had any gayness in them until they met me. They each knew about the other and were very cool. We even hung out at times.

My point is that, you never know who is willing. :D

In my junior year, I learned that a straight friend's friend was gay. He was very straight acting. He had a black belt in Tae Kwon Doo. I started taking Tae Kwon Doo. One day I went to his house he shared with 4 other macho guys. It was in the summer and there were only dudes there, 11 all together. It wasn't a gay thing at all in the sense that the guys there were out or fems, well one was. But it turned into gayness when he and his roommate took a shower and then hung out naked. It was a hot day and we went up to the roof and several dudes wanted to sunbathe and one thing led to another and before you know it dick stroking was happening. *|*

You never know dude. Hang in there. It gets better.:kiss:
 
oh man..I can so relate to you. I would be so down to meet you; too bad I live in San Diego. I know exactly what you mean. I don't really get attracted to feminine guys for some reason. It just doesn't click for me. I'm on the same boat as you buddy. I also wish I could find a "straight appearing" guy that could relate to me. sighh..best of luck to you buddy!! and I agree with these other guys said, make friends with the feminines and it'll be a chain effect. It's all about networking :)
 
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