Messy Situation

[WhiteRhino]

I'm aware that a gay porn website may not be the best place to go to for help, but it's anonymous for me, and I feel at ease on this site.

What I need is some guidance and advice, i've ended up in a really messy situation and its really starting to stress me out.

Thanks to anyone that has the patience to try and help.

In 2006 me and my mum moved out to Dubai. My mum and dad are split, I love my mum with all my heart and barley saw my dad. But due to circumstance we had to do it without my dads consent, and due to my age at the time, it was legally required.
After a month or so of living in Dubai we were contacted by my dad, he had pressed charges of kidnap against my mum, so I was forced to go live with my dad.

Before I left my mum promised it would be a temporary thing.

I moved to live with my dad and step mum in Glasgow and was really unhappy. I didn't know how to deal with the situation, so I just didn't think about it. Time passed and due to circumstances I lost contact with my mum.

Roughly 3 years passed and I had ended up falling in with the wrong crowd. I'd go out every weekend and get completely drunk etc. Eventually I got caught by my dad one time.

Then things changed considerably. Before I had been caught me and my dad had co existed fine. I hated the man, but I ignored it and we lived together relatively smoothly. But after this things started to turn sour.

We had many talks about it, but I continued drinking, the situation was a mess.

Then a letter arrived from my mum, we quickly got back in touch and organized for me to go visit her for the first time. It was a great visit, and during the time we talked about if I should move back to live with her, I was now of legal age to choose who I lived with. At the time I thought it'd be best if I finished my education in Glasgow.

When I came back from visiting my mum, things were much the same with my dad. But I continued drinking, and we got into a particularly heated argument, he bit me and we were shouting etc. He said he didn't want me in his house anymore, and thats when the thought of moving to my mums first occurred to me seriously.

A few weeks passed and after much talk, it was decided i'd moved to my mums.

I moved in December of last year.

But things haven't gone quite as planned.

My dad refuses to give us the letter of consent required to get me a visa. My visa ran out 2 days ago now.
I'm falling massively behind in my school work, i'm participating in a distance learning course with my school and have my final exams in may.
I haven't met anyone my own age out here and i'm getting increasingly frustrated.

I need to pass my exams this year or it will financially cripple my mum.

Im getting really really stressed and self esteems dropping. I had a breakdown a few weeks ago and just feel on edge constantly

I have no idea how I can try and fix this situation.

There are further complications between me and my dad that I won't go into just now.

Can anyone please offer some guidance or reassurance or just generally anything.

Thank you all.

 

[star-warrior]

Hi and welcome to JUB, I will move your thread over to the Coming Out, Relationships and BiSex Talk forum as it is no-flame.

My first thought is to visit the British Consulate/Embassy in Dubai and ask them for consular assistance. However, given the time constraint, it seems it would not be in your interests to outstay your visa as there will be consequences in that, which may mean forced repatriation if you stay illegally when the visa runs out - a record of it will be placed in the immigration dept there. That may prevent you ever visiting Dubai again.

I'm sorry about how things are. Hopefully other folks can share and advise you.

 

[WhiteRhino]

My dads used to be a lawyer, so he's well versed in the whole system I would guess.

I really want to talk it over with my mum, but I don't know what i'd say or where to start.

We're driving to Oman tomorrow and then back into Dubai again so that i'd have another 30 day visitors visa until the situation can be sorted.

 

[star-warrior]

^ that's neat.

If I understand visas correctly, then your mum's in Dubai, and you want a visa for Dubai. Therefore, the Dubai immigration department would want to see that you are able to support yourself in their country without recourse to their public purse. This means you can enter the country so long as you have a guarantor. If it was your dad until now, I don't see why if your mum works there that she can not act as your guarantor to satisfy the Immigration Dept. Unless there are other issues at hand. You've said you're now an adult, therefore I don't understand the permission thing.

I'm going offline now, so I might not be able to continue this conversation tonight.

 

[WhiteRhino]

Technically we should be able to get the visa sorted out without my dads consent because i'm an adult.
But the immigration system here is very strict. It's difficult to get a visa without all the standard paper work, even though some of it is unneeded.

I'll probably talk to my mum about it tomorrow.

 

[G-Lexington]

I guess I'd need a bit more info.

How old are you?
How much schooling do you have under your belt?
How much left do you have - either compulsory or voluntary?
What do you want to do once school is over?

Lex

 

[WhiteRhino]

Hi, sorry for not responding, i've been quite busy.

We drove to Oman yesterday to get an extension on my visa, we just had to pay a small fine for the over stay and it all worked out, got another 30 days. If required we can just drive to Oman every month until the problems sorted

As for school stuff, i'm feeling a bit better about it, I'm just gonna try and work really, really hard.

I met a few people last night as well, I went to one of the running clubs here for the first time and it was great, really nice atmosphere.

Further information asked for by G-Lexington

Im 18, i've got 1 year of compulsory education left. I'm currently planning on going to university to study Psychology and Marketing so that I could get a job in Marketing, the course would be 4 years.

I'm feeling a lot better than a few nights ago, Thanks for responses, it's reassuring in a way.

 

[star-warrior]

Hi WhiteRhino,

I'm pleased that you've found a workable bypass kinda resolution to your visa problem.

If you've time to spend here on JUB, then do explore and become part of the community.

All the best,
star-warrior.