mid life crisis or depression?

[blubee]

Gay guys are only 5%of the male pop then you have to find someone your age so it is tough.
By mid life 40s and you are still single do you get sad or had wish life was different? Can you be happy on your own?

 

[Peloso]

Can you be happy on your own?

If you're wired for companionship like most people, I don't think you can learn to be happy on your own.

Me, I prefer solitude.

 

[metta]

Gay guys are only 5%of the male pop then you have to find someone your age so it is tough.
By mid life 40s and you are still single do you get sad or had wish life was different? Can you be happy on your own?

Yes! I love my alone time. I don't have much interest in what society expects of me. I'm my own person, and I'm content living alone.

What is funny is seeing people pull out data that everyone has to be partnered to be happy. That it is not normal to be happy living alone. That is utter nonsense.

The only issue I have with it is when I eventually move, I don't know how I'm going to move all my stuff on my own. I mean, I will hire a moving company but preparing and moving as much as I can on my own will be over whelming. It is personal stuff and business stuff.

 

[rareboy]

Some people are wired to have a partner.

Some are not.

If you are in need of human companionship...it honestly isn't that hard to cultivate.

If you are happy with yourself and have a cat or five or a good boy dog...you can be delightfully content.

By the way Metta. It isn't any easier if you have a partner to move. You also have their stuff to deal with and by the time you are finished, you'll both think it would be easier if you were on your own.

 

[PalacePaul]

The only issue I have with it is when I eventually move, I don't know how I'm going to move all my stuff on my own. I mean, I will hire a moving company but preparing and moving as much as I can on my own will be over whelming. It is personal stuff and business stuff.

I already had this problem at 29

 

[peeonme]

Don't know, I have never been alone. Just finished 50 yrs. with my wife and dred the idea of surviving her.

 

[unloadonme]

I'm happy with the halfway house of having a partner, but living in separate homes.

 

[NotHardUp1]

I have many social contacts but no romantic prospects. I'm ok with having transitioned to being too senior for most men to want my company in any sexual way.

Get a lot of jollies online and in person talking to cute guys, telling jokes and zingers to all kinds of people, and reaching out to friends and family by phone and email.

I'm not closed to meeting a partner at this age, but I've never had much to offer sexually, other than admiration, so it would likely be someone else who's looking for companionship, not sex. That's not to say I wouldn't enjoy play and fooling around, but it couldn't the the center of the relationship.

But if it never happens, I'm not lonely in any way that I cannot satisfy with the love of friends.

If you find yourself feeling glum, by all means reach out by PMs here. Lots of us would be all too happy to chat and be good company, which makes all the difference when you're going through a patch. Don't sink without letting others help. We build community by degree.

 

[USEDCAR]

I have straight friends that are freaking out because they are in their 30s and still single and wanting to settle down and have children. My one friend has been on so many dates last summer i had a hard time keeping up. She eventually met a guy at a bar and now they are dating. I thought they are moving a bit fast.


I have a feeling i will probably spend my years alone, gay dating is just impossible everyone wants to hook up and/or the guys are picky about looks its just a mess of things.

 

[Peloso]

I have straight friends that are freaking out because they are in their 30s and still single and wanting to settle down and have children. My one friend has been on so many dates last summer i had a hard time keeping up. She eventually met a guy at a bar and now they are dating. I thought they are moving a bit fast.


I have a feeling i will probably spend my years alone, gay dating is just impossible everyone wants to hook up and/or the guys are picky about looks its just a mess of things.

This could tie in with the 'Gays who met their partners offline' thread.

So now straight people are using algorithms to set up families? No wonder I've been seeing a lot of weird, fucked up looking babies lately.

USEDCAR: do you think you would have more luck trying to meet people offline?

 

[Sebazz]

https://www.tiktok.com/video/7292609359169768710

 

[metta]

"find someone your age so it is tough."

It might help if you expand the age you are willing to date as well.

 

[USEDCAR]

This could tie in with the 'Gays who met their partners offline' thread.

So now straight people are using algorithms to set up families? No wonder I've been seeing a lot of weird, fucked up looking babies lately.

USEDCAR: do you think you would have more luck trying to meet people offline?

I don't understand what the straight folks is doing they just seem to be moving fast.

South Jersey doesn't have anything meetup for gays its next to a miracle if you meet a decent guy here.

 

[fabulouslyghetto]

is it midlife crisis or depression? yes. this recipes bakes THE most cantankerous people you will ever meet in life, the elder kweens. snarky for no phucking reason and it's all a very obvious and sophomoric defense mechanism, their miserable disposition runs people away so the solitude becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

as far as being happy, anyone can be happy in any circumstance, that's totally irrelevant to age orientation relationship status et cetera.

 

[rareboy]

https://www.tiktok.com/video/7292609359169768710

I think this is still a 'he' issue, not an everyone else issue.

If you put your whole life into tik tok and whining...who is going to chase after that?

He needs to give his head a shake, and get out of the fucking house.

And this sounds more like a mental health depression issue.

He needs some counselling.

 

[Peloso]

I don't understand what the straight folks is doing they just seem to be moving fast.

There's more of them. More meat to choose from. Plus, heterosexuality is the preferred "norm" so they can be flirtatious or even lewd in public and nobody cares.

South Jersey doesn't have anything meetup for gays its next to a miracle if you meet a decent guy here.

Atlantic City used to have a bunch of bars and clubs but that was decades ago and they were pretty sleazy. So did New Hope PA but much nicer. Not sure how south you are.

If Camden hasn't changed, I'm sure there's lots of meth heads there who will suck your dick for a churro.

 

[USEDCAR]

There's more of them. More meat to choose from. Plus, heterosexuality is the preferred "norm" so they can be flirtatious or even lewd in public and nobody cares.



Atlantic City used to have a bunch of bars and clubs but that was decades ago and they were pretty sleazy. So did New Hope PA but much nicer. Not sure how south you are.

If Camden hasn't changed, I'm sure there's lots of meth heads there who will suck your dick for a churro.

Atlantic City went down hill over the last decade or so

Gross why would i want a meth head? if i want to hook up i can just go on grindr or hit up one of my old fuck buddies. I prefer a relationship as i said before its impossible in the gay community everyone wants to hook up.

 

[Peloso]

Gross why would i want a meth head? if i want to hook up i can just go on grindr or hit up one of my old fuck buddies. I prefer a relationship as i said before its impossible in the gay community everyone wants to hook up.

I was kidding.

I'm the last person here qualified to give romantic advice, but I did read something years ago in about changing your daily routine, such as where you stop to get coffee or shop for groceries because this way you'll run into different people instead of the same old faces you regularly see. But this was written by a guy who lives in Manhattan, so I'm not sure this would be helpful out in the sticks. . . but there's an idea. Move to New York. More gay people there than anywhere else in the US by far, and it's easier to flirt a bit more openly if you see someone you like.

https://www.tiktok.com/video/7292609359169768710