Mildly embarrassing secrets

[LilBit]

I forgot my department chair's last name the other day. Fortunately I didn't need to know it at that moment, but it was alarming nonetheless.

 

[NYCDude]

When I am alone, my hand is on my dick. Always. As soon as I am done typing this, my hand will be back on my dick.

im always cupping my balls when im chillin at home, watching tv, on the computer, watching a movie. totally absent mindedly. im in boxers and my hand is in them

 

[NYCDude]

i run a movie theater that does a lot of director Q/As. We played an a well reviewed animated movie that had just been nominated for an oscar and i was introducing the director to the audience when i blanked on his name. and stood there for a minute and walked off. might have been my most embarrassing moment. Did i mention that I run the theater and a lot fo my employees were in the audience. it was bad

 

[The White Stripe]

One time I turned my car off without putting it in park. I kept letting off the brake trying to figure out why is was rolling...

It took me ten minutes to figure out I had not put the car into park.

Yeah...I got stares at that basketball game as people walked by me...

 

[Anders123]

I'm afraid of shower drains. I don't know why, but I have to stand as far away from them as possible when I shower.

I have an intense phobia of driving, despite never being involved in a crash. I didn't get my L's till I was 18, and to this day my palms sweat and my heart rate increases dramatically when I drive.

I have an anxiety disorder and I have cried almost hysterically in front of my brother because I felt like I was dying, more than once.

I was extremely skinny during High School, and always wore a long sleeved shirt or jumper even on hot days, people would always ask 'why', and I would just smile awkwardly and say "I don't know, it's my style", despite being uncomfortable on hot days.

When I was in primary school, sometimes I wouldn't eat my lunch and was so petrified about how my parents would react that I would throw the lunchbag (sandwich included) under the house. Then when we had an extension the builders asked my dad what all of those paper bags were doing under the house
When I was asked about it I acted like I had no idea.

I cry when there's emotional scenes in comedy TV shows like Scrubs, and How I Met Your Mother. I even cried once whilst watching Futurama....

 

[chace1617]

once i had to give my teacher a project i was working on and this would give me a grade for the semester, i had to go in his office have a small interview with him and talk about my project i was working on then give it to him... i had worked really hard cause i wanted it to be perfect but when he looked at the first page he was like''what is this?'' and i'm like ''what's wrong?'' apparently i had written his first name wrong! his last name was correct but i wrote a totally different first name ! he was surprised and i felt really bad for that!i was like ''why do i have to be so stupid?''

i can't sleep at night when i listen a watch ticking, that tick tack noise makes me so angry for a reason i find it so annoying! most of the times i throw the watch out of the window because of the tick tack noise...

i'm really scared to look in a mirror at night, i close my eyes when i need to use the bathroom at night...

 

[strangepoetry]

I don't really know if this is embarrassing, per se, but Marla Singer from Fight Club is one o0f my role models.

I think it's more depressing than anything else.

"I haven't been fucked that good since grade school."
--Marla Singer is pure brilliance.

 

[jdcnow]

When everyone else is watching the Super Bowl, I'll actually be on Animal Planet watching the Puppy Bowl.

 

[rainyguy67]

I cried watching Revenge of the Sith when the Jedi were being killed.

I answered the phone You've reached Satan how can I help you commit blasphemy today? to my born again aunt.

 

[The White Stripe]

I cried watching Revenge of the Sith when the Jedi were being killed.

I answered the phone You've reached Satan how can I help you commit blasphemy today? to my born again aunt.

I...umm...cried too...


shhh...

 

[jdcnow]

I once answered the intercom system by saying, "Masturbation Station, helping you help yourself since 1995, how may I direct your call?" I was expecting one of my friends to drop in, but it was my BOSS.

Luckily, he has a good sense of humour, so he just laughed it off.

Don't feel bad, Ashy. I've done the same thing, although not nearly as funny in my case.

Well, back when I worked at one of the local Walmarts here, this particular location was small-class Walmart department store (as opposed to the more common Supercenters) attached to a mall. Well, the mall closed at 8.00pm, when when I worked the mall exit's checkout counter, I would have to give the "the mall exit is now closing" speech over the store's PA system. I was just hired on, so I had only worked there a week or two. Well, a few weeks prior, I had quit my job as cashier at the Kmart Supercenter across the street from this Walmart.

When you get over the public address system to speak to customers, you are always supposed to tag your speech at the end with, "...And as always, thank you for shopping at your (insert town name here) Walmart". Well...'Walmart' may not have been what I necessarily said. I realized when I had said 'Super Kmart' immediately, whispered, 'Oh God', then got off the intercom. Yes, that whole incident went live and loud across the whole building and into the parking lot.

After I hang up, and quietly pray for my job, my checkout counter's phone rings. When I answer, I hear the store director on the phone laughing hysterically, and asking me, "OK, what store do you work at, Joe?"

I told him that I had realized what I had said right when I had said it, and that I almost died from the embarrassment. Thankfully, the man had a sense of humor, and didn't fire my butt on the spot.

 

[SonOfSlobone]

im always cupping my balls when im chillin at home, watching tv, on the computer, watching a movie. totally absent mindedly. im in boxers and my hand is in them

I always have my hand in my pants playing with myself, while talking on the telephone. Not sexually, just feeling around in there. My ex was horrified because he caught me doing it one day when I was talking to my parents...

 

[Kyanimal]

I was new to Wisconsin, new to Milwaukee, new to my car sales job, and fresh out of college. Eager to please, I was usually the first to answer the phone, which seemed to "bug" the other sales guys. Heh! I was quick!

SO ... one "slow" evening, I answered a call asking to speak to "Mr. Mehoff", who, supposedly, had his car in for service. Now, I had gone to school with a guy whose last name was Imhoff, so I didn't think anything about it, and immediately paged "Mr. Mehoff", which could be heard throughout the building, the lot, and around the close neighborhood. Of course, no one picked up the call, and I told the caller that it seemed "Mr. Mehoff" was not there.

A few minutes later, I answered the phone, again, and the same previous voice said "Mr. Mehoff" had likely arrived, by now, and maybe it would help if I also used his first name, while paging. It was "Jack".

It took me a few moments to figure out why everyone was laughing after I had blared "Jack Mehoff" over the sound system!

Keep smilin'!!
Chaz

 

[SonOfSlobone]

^^^You're lucky they didn't ask to speak to Mike Hunt...

 

[BelovedEnigma]

When I was younger, my cousin and I decided it would be fun to get completely naked and play in a large pile of sawdust. Being naked was fun... the sawdust not so much. The full body hives and explaining to our parents what we did was a bit embarrassing.

 

[Críostóir]

You know Vinnie the ShamWow/SlapChop guy? I think he's HOT. I would totally do him.

 

[jamieallover]

i bawled my eyes out when friends ended...i still crush this guy i swear I'm over...even though we never dated

 

[The White Stripe]

I was told recently that I come off here as very stuck up and cliquey.

Far from it.

I'm REALLY shy and very quiet in person. I like to think I'm pretty nice.

I get all shy and surprised when I get pm's and people actually want to talk to me.

I do like debating and stand firm in my beliefs.

Who said that about you?

Tell me their name and I will beat their gay asses for talking bad about the glorious Elvin!


How dare they!!!

 

[Lefty]

As Leviticus is my witness.

Elvin is a shy gentle Latino Cuban that is so

non-argumentative and desirous of the family

dynamic of loyalty, love, and benevolence that

he tries to pass as a Spanish/Puerto Rican...

A Sprican...do not cast foul aspersions on him

or his character.

I am a proud member of the Friends of Elvin Society.

Buenos Dios,

LEFTY
Senor Zurdo





btw,

1-11-11 was my 6th Anniv, today I surpassed 22,222 posts...I know you are impressed,
I am not banned or even censored (at this moment) Let there be dancing and drinking.

 

[Kyanimal]

I was told recently that I come off here as very stuck up and cliquey.

Far from it.

I'm REALLY shy and very quiet in person. I like to think I'm pretty nice.

I get all shy and surprised when I get pm's and people actually want to talk to me.

I do like debating and stand firm in my beliefs.

Who said that about you?

Tell me their name and I will beat their gay asses for talking bad about the glorious Elvin!


How dare they!!!

I'll back you up on that one, "Stripe"!

Elvin ...

For as long as I've "known" you, which goes way further back than your current "join date", I have always Respected, and Admired, You! You truly ARE one of the Nice Guys around "here"!!

Keep smilin'!!
Chaz