The Original Gay Porn Community - Free Gay Movies and Photos, Gay Porn Site Reviews and Adult Gay Forums

  • Welcome To Just Us Boys - The World's Largest Gay Message Board Community

    In order to comply with recent US Supreme Court rulings regarding adult content, we will be making changes in the future to require that you log into your account to view adult content on the site.
    If you do not have an account, please register.
    REGISTER HERE - 100% FREE / We Will Never Sell Your Info

    PLEASE READ: To register, turn off your VPN (iPhone users- disable iCloud); you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.

  • Hi Guest - Did you know?
    Hot Topics is a Safe for Work (SFW) forum.

Moving out: pros and cons

Do you know anyone who is looking for a roommate? If so, you could always move in with them. Otherwise, maybe find a place very close to home? That way you have your own place to help you become a more independent person, but you are still close enough to home that you can go home for a bit whenever you find yourself feeling lonely. I think that could be a good way to transition for you. Moving out of the house could potentially help you build self-esteem, self-confidence, and help you create a more active social life for yourself. The longer you put off moving out, the harder it is going to be to actually do it.
 
Paws said:
:eek:

- you can invite men over and have wild sex
- you will not get fat because you have to buy food and do the household yourself
- you're seriously missing out in your development if you still stay with your parents at such an age

You can still pass by mommy weekly and give her the dirty laundry to do :cool:
Click to expand...

Sex is not likely to happen. Can't get a handjob in a darkroom, remember? And one of the reasons I got fat last time I wasn't living here was basically because I was living off Burger King. I doubt it would be that bad second time around, but I just wanted to point out that buying healthy food on a limited budget isn't always easy.

I'd also like to know what "development" I'm missing out on. I know that having your own address makes some things easier, but up until now, moving really hasn't been an option, and from my POV at the moment, the cons still seem to slightly outweigh the pros.

But hey, admitting that there *are* pros has gotta be progress, right?

SamTheMan said:
Well, but I guess you're right, I don't know this guy at all, was only trying to help out.
Click to expand...

You want the potted history? Most people here have heard it enough so I try not to bring it up any more unless someone specifically asks.
 
I would agree with gsdx. It is a good thing to be self-sufficient as long as it works from a practical standpoint. With the dismal state of the economy the past couple years, few will admit it but a LOT of people have been dashing BACK HOME to live with the folks...out of necessity. The deciding factor is something only you can really determine. If you are ready and financially able to leave the nest, do it. If not, perhaps a point in the future is a better time. It doesn't sound like you have any urgency to move.
 
If you have the money, GTFO your parents house at 30 or you'll be doomed to a life of zero dates.

I'm 25 and I still live at home, but only because I just graduated university a couple years ago and lived at home that whole time too. My dad didn't want me to rent ("It's a waste of money!" he said), plus Italian families tend to have offspring at home for a longer time. But I did it, I bought a duplex and I move out in February just after my 26th birthday. I'm excited.

I know that I'll have less money, but it's worth it. I need to be free.

And why do you have to give up the gym? That seems like an excuse more than anything. Gym memberships are cheap.
 
MindBlast said:
And why do you have to give up the gym? That seems like an excuse more than anything. Gym memberships are cheap.
Click to expand...

I'm barely breaking even on my bank account as it is. I could just about afford to move out, but I would have to cut back on some stuff to cover the additional expenses, and since I don't need a gym membership to live, it would be one of the first things to go.
 
winterknight said:
I'm barely breaking even on my bank account as it is. I could just about afford to move out, but I would have to cut back on some stuff to cover the additional expenses, and since I don't need a gym membership to live, it would be one of the first things to go.
Click to expand...

If you ever eat out, cut that out first. Cut out things like bread (you don't need it), coffee (you really don't need it), sugars where possible, processed foods.

Live with someone to split costs. There are lots of other things you can do too.
 
You're asking the wrong question. Instead of "if" you need to ask yourself "when".
 
Before you move out try to have one years rent saved up in case of an emergency.

If you can not save while living at home, unless you have to pay rent at home, don't move out.
 
What I mean is, you'll find personal ways to enjoy your own privacy. It may be as complex as finding a way you like to arrange your apartment, to something as simple as having music playing from the radio all the time. You may enjoy hanging out naked or eating and cooking whenever you want.

Sex is one thing, but there are plenty of things people do and enjoy about their lives when it's in a space they control alone.
 
I've been living on my own since I was 19... can't imagine living with parents in my 30's, but I don't know what your life is like. But in general, I think the answer is yes, moving out might be a positive step towards socialization.
 
Other than work and the occasional gym visit, my life is essentially non-existent.

And I doubt anything will be happening until I've got the credit card paid off - whenever that's likely to be.

But hey, a few months ago I wouldn't even have admitted that there are pros. So that's got to be progress, right?

Anyone?

Bueller?
 
Is your parents house kind of big enough to make your own apartment?

Maybe make the basement into your own apartment, your own personal space with everything needed. Bathroom, kitchen. Maybe even pay your parents rent etc, so you get the feel of living away from your parents, the privacy, but the comfort of home. And it won't be embarassing, because you're paying rent for your own place....it just happens to be connected to your parents place :p
And if that day comes and you bring a sexy boy home...you have all the space and privacy you need!

Something like your own entrance, would be awesome also. But I'm not sure where you live, or how your house is set up.

But by the sounds of it, moving out on your own doesn't really seem like an option. You need money to be independent. To go out, to meet people, to stay healthy physically and mentally...diet and exercise etc, you need money. Don't move out if you can't afford it...you'll end up back at home, and things may get worse.

Just my opinion.


Also, have you thought of volunteering somewhere?

You have work...and work is work. You don't want that to be your life obviously. But if you have a limited social life, put your thoughts, time and effort into helping people! It could open opportunities to meet people, socialize, feel good about yourself, fill up time, and you get out of the house! Adding things to your CV never hurts as well.
 
MrEleven said:
Is your parents house kind of big enough to make your own apartment?

Maybe make the basement into your own apartment, your own personal space with everything needed. Bathroom, kitchen. Maybe even pay your parents rent etc, so you get the feel of living away from your parents, the privacy, but the comfort of home. And it won't be embarassing, because you're paying rent for your own place....it just happens to be connected to your parents place :p
And if that day comes and you bring a sexy boy home...you have all the space and privacy you need!

Something like your own entrance, would be awesome also. But I'm not sure where you live, or how your house is set up.
Click to expand...

We don't have a basement. I'm in the same room I've been in since my sister was born in 1982. I've semi-taken over one other room as a study, but it's still just two rooms in a house that there's no way of getting to - or even between - without going through the "shared areas". There's not even a separate bathroom I can use. Nice idea, but not workable, I'm afraid.
 
You've actually made incredible progress and if I'm sometimes (usually?) harsh with you it's only to nudge you further onwards.

Think 30 or so years to the future with your parents getting ripe for a nursing home. Where are you going to be living? So I say to you again, the question isn't really about "if", but when... and where and yes, there is also a big "how" element.
 
winterknight said:
And I doubt anything will be happening until I've got the credit card paid off - whenever that's likely to be.
Click to expand...

This seems like a real problem.
When you are still in debt I really don't recommend to move out.

Step 1: Get rid of debt.
Step 2: Save at least 6 month of rent.
...
Step X: Move out.


And I'm sorry if it's to personal but how did you accumulate your debt if you have a job live with your parents and your only recreational spending is the gym?
 
ANGEL_FCK said:
And I'm sorry if it's to personal but how did you accumulate your debt if you have a job live with your parents and your only recreational spending is the gym?
Click to expand...

I'm woefully underpaid (the going rate for my job is about £5000pa more than I make) and I've had a lot of big expenses (new furniture in two rooms, new computer, driving lessons and associated car-related stuff, first real holiday in seven years) over the last couple of years. It wiped out what I'd managed to save and still left more on the card than I can pay off in one go.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top