My boyfriend's past keep coming back to haunt me

[mcbrion]

And, by the way, the American aphorism is, "Birds of a feather, flock together." Same thing: like attracts like; water seeks its own level, etc. I didn't realize one of my friends, who I would have jumped in front of a bus for, did not have the same loyalty to me. He once told me, back in the 80s, when I was dating a particularly sex guy who workekd downstairs in a tony restaurant (San Francisco), 'I'm going to take him away from you." And I loved him so much I just said, "If he likes you more than he liked me, Timmy, he's yours." It was only years later, when a different best friend was dying of AIDS and living with me and I was in therapy and mentioned this, that the therapist said, "What kind of friend says he's going to take your boyfriend away? And I said, I'd GIVE Jay to Timmy because I wanted Timmy to be happy. (I was pretty appealing and had a lot of guys I could have dated, but Timmy wasn't quite so built, so He didn't attract guys like I did). But she reiterated, yes, you were willing to allow it, but what kind of friend TELLS you he's going to try to steal your boyfriend and when I reflected on it, I thought, wow, what was I thinking?. That's not cool! I'd never go after someone else's boyfriend.
So, back to "...birds of a feather..."