i wish i could rename the title of this thread, i would call it my success story, cause thats exactly what it is.
I want anyone in the future that goes through what i went through to know its okay, yeah, haha its okay to be gay. i know that early on in the stage of trying to figure out who you are...its hard to accept anything other than what you want, its hard to understand now, but its really okay. anything that goes on naturally in your head is normal. if you force other thoughts into your head, thats when the thoughts becomes abnormal.
i am from a small town in iowa, i have never met a gay guy until i came out. gay is something that is rarley heard of around here. but its still normal, its perfectly okay. the support i got was amazing, its strange how accepting people are.
i dont know what i am. im not sure if im gay, or bi. idk. and guess what, i dont care. im going to date for love, im going to marry for love, im going to let love happen on its own. im going to not worry.
and for those that followed me all along to my last post.... i can let you know how my first date went...
it was fun, we hung out at his house and watched a movie...well....im not sure much watching of the movie went on. hes a real nice guy, so second date? sure, why not? ...that date didnt go as smooth, we went out to eat and hung around town, he, being out and open for along time, was comforable to hold hands make out in public...me, not so much, it was wierd, i was still worring about what people were thinking. another week goes by and i tell him...im not ready to date guys, its just still too new to me. he was upset and i felt real bad, but i couldnt rush into something i didnt want. now....feeling lonely, not sure what to do, im happy with who i am, but like i said, there isnt many gay people in this area of the state....
i did start taking to another guy, really good looking and funny, and i started to like him, we were planing to hang out and then he texted me...he said that he sucks at life.
of course im thinking that i can ask him whats wrong (and show him how caring i can be) but he tells me that his ex hung out with him the night before and they "did stuff" i was really upset and basically told him that i didnt have time to deal with that crap. he knew i liked him, so why did he tell me that? was he trying to make me feel like i had compotition?? i dont understand...it really hurt.... but like i said, im lonley...i regret saying that i didnt have time to deal with that...
should i ask for his forgiveness??
thanks guys.