My Girlfriend Problems Semi long

[Lewis1]

Ok I am not fully out and if I was no one would really know because i am sorta of a loner. But there is this girl that I used to go to high school with back in the state I used to live in. She kind of befriended me and we weren’t cushy but we always talked and had like a lil courtship. We used to have like mini competitions in our classes cause we usually wound up being the smartest people in the classes but nevertheless. I moved away and we really didn’t speak for a while till about a year ago and we have been talking (off and on) on MySpace. But for the past month we’ve been talking (on yahoo messenger) like every day. We’ve become like so much closer while we're mile away than ever like she told me so many personal things and opened up to me and then I felt comfortable enough to share that I had some feelings for guys. and it’s just so nice to talk to someone about this stuff. I always thought I would be more comfortable talking to guys about it loll Ok now getting more to the point. Before I started high school I told myself that I will not become real close to a female cause I hate it when girls just tell me oh you’re a friend or you’re like a brother. I guess I have that brotherly quality about me but I really got sick of it and every time I made a new friend it was a girl and all of em wanted to treat me like "their girlfriend" and I really got tired of that so I said I wouldn’t let myself go that far with a female till the point they see me as a girlfriend ( just to mention I am not a feminine kind of guy) So I tried focusing on guys and building friendships with guys (which never works out for whatever reason)so the question is should I continue to avoid female friends that want me to be their girlfriend? I want girls to see me as the datable type even though I am not that into girls it’s kind of weird to explain but I still need some friends and if all I can rake in is chicks should I just accept this?

 

[rareboy]

Ok I am not fully out and if I was no one would really know because i am sorta of a loner. But there is this girl that I used to go to high school with back in the state I used to live in. She kind of befriended me and we weren’t cushy but we always talked and had like a lil courtship. We used to have like mini competitions in our classes cause we usually wound up being the smartest people in the classes but nevertheless. I moved away and we really didn’t speak for a while till about a year ago and we have been talking (off and on) on MySpace. But for the past month we’ve been talking (on yahoo messenger) like every day. We’ve become like so much closer while we're mile away than ever like she told me so many personal things and opened up to me and then I felt comfortable enough to share that I had some feelings for guys. and it’s just so nice to talk to someone about this stuff. I always thought I would be more comfortable talking to guys about it loll Ok now getting more to the point. Before I started high school I told myself that I will not become real close to a female cause I hate it when girls just tell me oh you’re a friend or you’re like a brother. I guess I have that brotherly quality about me but I really got sick of it and every time I made a new friend it was a girl and all of em wanted to treat me like "their girlfriend" and I really got tired of that so I said I wouldn’t let myself go that far with a female till the point they see me as a girlfriend ( just to mention I am not a feminine kind of guy) So I tried focusing on guys and building friendships with guys (which never works out for whatever reason)so the question is should I continue to avoid female friends that want me to be their girlfriend? I want girls to see me as the datable type even though I am not that into girls it’s kind of weird to explain but I still need some friends and if all I can rake in is chicks should I just accept this?

If you don't want to be Will to their Grace, then don't play the game. Obviously, girls see you as a supportive and interesting companion.

From your post, I'm not sure why since you seem to have no clue about the purpose and value of friendship. Like 99% of all children under the age of 22, who only have bookspacefacepage relationships you also are confusing friendship for just being friendly. At this point, you're just a pen pal. You're just being used as a kind of 'dear diary' or a bouncing board for opinions.

I'd be asking myself, why am I apparently unable to make friends with guys as well as women.

By the way, please don't post in bold italics. It triggers seizures. And if you were among the smartest kids in the class, then you understand how helpful paragraphs and grammar can be to those trying to read your text.

 

[KaraBulut]

Lewis1:

Part of this is about you and part of this is about them.

will not become real close to a female cause I hate it when girls just tell me oh you’re a friend or you’re like a brother.

About them: Girls are incredibly competitive with each other. There's a lot of dysfunction in the way that girls interact with each other. That's why girls are ecstatic to have a gay male friend that they can let their hair down, dish about guys and not have to worry about all of the drama that comes with girl friends. And they love it when they can be around a guy without all that "does he like me and does he want to get in my pants" stuff.


I want girls to see me as the datable type even though I am not that into girls

About you: Rareboy covered alot of ground about the difference between a chat, Myspace "friend" and a real friend that you can hang with and be yourself. I understand what you are saying in the quote above but it is really wrong to use girls in this way.


I felt comfortable enough to share that I had some feelings for guys. and it’s just so nice to talk to someone about this stuff.

In this sentence above, you just told yourself why having friends who can talk to is important.

Let go of all this other BS and focus on being a friend.

 

[Lewis1]

If you don't want to be Will to their Grace, then don't play the game. Obviously, girls see you as a supportive and interesting companion.

From your post, I'm not sure why since you seem to have no clue about the purpose and value of friendship. Like 99% of all children under the age of 22, who only have bookspacefacepage relationships you also are confusing friendship for just being friendly. At this point, you're just a pen pal. You're just being used as a kind of 'dear diary' or a bouncing board for opinions.

I'd be asking myself, why am I apparently unable to make friends with guys as well as women.

By the way, please don't post in bold italics. It triggers seizures. And if you were among the smartest kids in the class, then you understand how helpful paragraphs and grammar can be to those trying to read your text.

well oh sorry bout the bold lol

but um with us its not just a bookspace page type of thing because weve actually met and interacted with each other before i moved away and we both cant afford long distance charges all the time so we just use yahoo lol

i dont feel as though i am being used by her its a 2 way street with us and she actually was liking me (to date ) at one point so eh

hey i know the value of friendship but i dont want the same types of friendships and thats not all i want to be is a sideline male girfriend lol

 

[Lewis1]

Lewis1:

Part of this is about you and part of this is about them.

will not become real close to a female cause I hate it when girls just tell me oh you’re a friend or you’re like a brother.

About them: Girls are incredibly competitive with each other. There's a lot of dysfunction in the way that girls interact with each other. That's why girls are ecstatic to have a gay male friend that they can let their hair down, dish about guys and not have to worry about all of the drama that comes with girl friends. And they love it when they can be around a guy without all that "does he like me and does he want to get in my pants" stuff.


I want girls to see me as the datable type even though I am not that into girls

About you: Rareboy covered alot of ground about the difference between a chat, Myspace "friend" and a real friend that you can hang with and be yourself. I understand what you are saying in the quote above but it is really wrong to use girls in this way.


I felt comfortable enough to share that I had some feelings for guys. and it’s just so nice to talk to someone about this stuff.

In this sentence above, you just told yourself why having friends who can talk to is important.

Let go of all this other BS and focus on being a friend.

oh i see but what do you mean it is wrong to use girls in that way?
i dont feel like iam using them lol please explain
but i get what you are saying

 

[KaraBulut]

oh i see but what do you mean it is wrong to use girls in that way?
i dont feel like iam using them lol please explain
but i get what you are saying


There's probably a dozen active threads in this forum about how straight guys are leading on their gay male friends. They get referred to as "dick-teases".

What you are doing is no different.

You want girls to see you as "dateable" but you don't have any interest in dating them because you prefer guys.

 

[Lewis1]

oh i see but what do you mean it is wrong to use girls in that way?
i dont feel like iam using them lol please explain
but i get what you are saying


There's probably a dozen active threads in this forum about how straight guys are leading on their gay male friends. They get referred to as "dick-teases".

What you are doing is no different.

You want girls to see you as "dateable" but you don't have any interest in dating them because you prefer guys.

lol i knowwwwwwwwwwwww but
i have a slight interest if the chemistry is right
alot of times after getting to know a girl i start to like them lol and want to date them but by that point they have thrown out the "like a brother card"
its weird lol i guess i got to be upfront with what i want