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My straight best friend sent me this...

I kind of feel like it's been too long since they initially sent it for you to be able to give yourself an easy out if you don't want your feelings coming to light. It reads as slightly more suspicious about your motives for asking. From their perspective, why would you bring up a several weeks old text rather than ask them about it closer to when you originally received it?

Not saying you can't approach them about it, just that in my mind it seems more risky.

And you seemed to express a fair amount of reluctance to risking the friendship for more. The picture could be a way to test the waters of if they're expressing interest but it seems pointless to discuss if you're not going to be able to go beyond that point.
 
SeaCore said:
I kind of feel like it's been too long since they initially sent it for you to be able to give yourself an easy out if you don't want your feelings coming to light. It reads as slightly more suspicious about your motives for asking. From their perspective, why would you bring up a several weeks old text rather than ask them about it closer to when you originally received it?

Not saying you can't approach them about it, just that in my mind it seems more risky.

And you seemed to express a fair amount of reluctance to risking the friendship for more. The picture could be a way to test the waters of if they're expressing interest but it seems pointless to discuss if you're not going to be able to go beyond that point.
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True! I am going to wait for him to give me several more hints indicating that he wants more then I will take it from that point. If not I'm going to drop it. 😎
 
knockmeupbaby25 said:
True! I am going to wait for him to give me several more hints indicating that he wants more then I will take it from that point. If not I'm going to drop it. 😎
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I know it's hard, and almost every gay man has this experience at least once in their life, but you have to be honest with yourself. There are literally dozens of stories, books, songs, and movies about the unrequited love between gay and straight friends. Don't romanticize your relationship. Be honest with yourself. Has his dating history been only women? If he's only dated women then that's what he's interested in. Has he ever asked you to do something and in the middle it felt like a date? Straight men often enjoy the emotional support and encouragement they get from gay men since they don't have to "bro" it up. I'm willing to bet that he acts differently when it's just you and him alone as opposed to when others are around because he can be less guarded.

I know it's a difficult situation to be in and it's hard not to catch feelings. He knows you are gay and I'm guessing since you are asking for advice on this that you are single and don't date. If he wants something more with you then he will be far more obvious. Men generally lack subtly when they become attracted to someone. I'm willing to bet that given the dreamy way you described him that he knows you find him attractive. Therefore, if he shared that attraction he'd let you know.

I'm not trying to be a downer about it but it can turn to resentment and jealous when you've developed feelings and suddenly he's found a girl that he dotes on or he stops having time for you to hang with his straight bros. The best thing you can do is accept that you love him but he can't return the same love to you.

Then again you might be that one in million gay boy that turns his straight crush permanently. I say permanently because these situations often ended up with the straight guy experimenting but move on back to hetero side after he's tried it.

I'll repeat...be honest about it to yourself and don't cross any lines until he gives you an honest green light.
 
Allicide said:
I know it's hard, and almost every gay man has this experience at least once in their life, but you have to be honest with yourself. There are literally dozens of stories, books, songs, and movies about the unrequited love between gay and straight friends. Don't romanticize your relationship. Be honest with yourself. Has his dating history been only women? If he's only dated women then that's what he's interested in. Has he ever asked you to do something and in the middle it felt like a date? Straight men often enjoy the emotional support and encouragement they get from gay men since they don't have to "bro" it up. I'm willing to bet that he acts differently when it's just you and him alone as opposed to when others are around because he can be less guarded.

I know it's a difficult situation to be in and it's hard not to catch feelings. He knows you are gay and I'm guessing since you are asking for advice on this that you are single and don't date. If he wants something more with you then he will be far more obvious. Men generally lack subtly when they become attracted to someone. I'm willing to bet that given the dreamy way you described him that he knows you find him attractive. Therefore, if he shared that attraction he'd let you know.

I'm not trying to be a downer about it but it can turn to resentment and jealous when you've developed feelings and suddenly he's found a girl that he dotes on or he stops having time for you to hang with his straight bros. The best thing you can do is accept that you love him but he can't return the same love to you.

Then again you might be that one in million gay boy that turns his straight crush permanently. I say permanently because these situations often ended up with the straight guy experimenting but move on back to hetero side after he's tried it.

I'll repeat...be honest about it to yourself and don't cross any lines until he gives you an honest green light.
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Spot on... Thanks 😎 I do have feelings for him but his friendship is way more important than maybe a possible 1 night stand. The only thing that I have gotten from him is the gif. And then of course he was very persistent about having to tell me that he & his girlfriend has broken up. Maybe I am making it something that it isn't... Sigh 😢
 
What the hell......keep talking to him........sounds like HE might make the 1st (2nd) move........ ;)
 
Dude, give it a rest.

Enjoy your friend's company for what it is and let that be the love you keep instead of obsessing over a single image on your phone.

You're going to drive yourself bananas and make yourself sick, AND you're going to drive him away by the simple act of constantly questioning and guessing (in your head or otherwise) what every simple movement and dialogue between him signifies to you and whether or not it means you stand a chance.

Seriously, man, this thread has been nonstop for like two weeks now. It sounds to me like you want people to tell you what to do but not to actually follow their advice. I wouldn't be surprised if you end up talking to him about that damn GIF ANYWAY, despite what the majority of the people here have been telling you.

It's your life, of course. But you only get the one to do it right.

Be more like Elsa... Let the fucking thing go and enjoy your dude's friendship. That'll mean more to you than any time in bed, any day.
 
kibunoubu said:
Dude, give it a rest.

Enjoy your friend's company for what it is and let that be the love you keep instead of obsessing over a single image on your phone.

You're going to drive yourself bananas and make yourself sick, AND you're going to drive him away by the simple act of constantly questioning and guessing (in your head or otherwise) what every simple movement and dialogue between him signifies to you and whether or not it means you stand a chance.

Seriously, man, this thread has been nonstop for like two weeks now. It sounds to me like you want people to tell you what to do but not to actually follow their advice. I wouldn't be surprised if you end up talking to him about that damn GIF ANYWAY, despite what the majority of the people here have been telling you.

It's your life, of course. But you only get the one to do it right.

Be more like Elsa... Let the fucking thing go and enjoy your dude's friendship. That'll mean more to you than any time in bed, any day.
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It's my fucking JUB account & I posted in the Straight & Bisexual forum because there's other fucking people who may not even read posts in the other fucking forum! Don't like the F-Bombs..? Don't come into my post thinking that it's to be a condescending prick!
 
Just a tip for the future, when you crosspost (Post the same thing to several places) it's a good practice to specify that you're doing this because it can be a little disorienting to see the same thread twice. This is part of why I was confused on if you'd been sent the gif again.
Simply mention either in the title that it's a cross post in parentheses or say it somewhere in the body of the opening post. Including a link is good too so other people can reference what was said in the other thread.

It can also read, when you're asking for advice, as if you're fishing for an answer you want to hear to justify your immediate impulse.
I'm not claiming this is what you were trying to do, only that it can come across this way.

Specifying the crosspost helps build trust between you and your peers because it shows an acknowledgement that you have gotten advice and that you're not stripping away any context.

I think you're totally justified in being a bit miffed but I can also understand why some people might have reservations about your intent and adding that little bit of context goes a long way in avoiding those reservations.
 
I second the above post. When I read this thread I felt like It had already been asked and answered elsewhere, LOL
 
knockmeupbaby25 said:
It's my fucking JUB account & I posted in the Straight & Bisexual forum because there's other fucking people who may not even read posts in the other fucking forum! Don't like the F-Bombs..? Don't come into my post thinking that it's to be a condescending prick!
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I love the F-bombs, keep 'em coming!

This is EXACTLY the kind of reaction I'd expect from someone completely unwilling to hear what he doesn't want to hear.

Bon voyage, dude! I hope you get to keep your friendship when you fuck it all up!
 
He might be giving you a hint. Ask him is that's his in the picture. If you want to play, ask if he's interested. If he declines back off, but at least you've planted the seed. Life is way too short to hesitate.
 
kibunoubu said:
I love the F-bombs, keep 'em coming!

This is EXACTLY the kind of reaction I'd expect from someone completely unwilling to hear what he doesn't want to hear.

Bon voyage, dude! I hope you get to keep your friendship when you fuck it all up!
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There's no reason to be so condescending. That's why you got a bunch of F-Bombs. I didn't think that people would have a stroke over me posting the same post in a different section of the site.
 
A stroke?

Haaaardly.

But being gay and being friends with soooooo many straight guys I had a crush on at some point, I know what it's like to be frustrated and read miracles into a bunch of nothing...

Whatever lesson you'll learn from this, clearly you'll learn them the hard way.

I wish you the best of luck, pal!
 
kibunoubu said:
A stroke?

Haaaardly.

But being gay and being friends with soooooo many straight guys I had a crush on at some point, I know what it's like to be frustrated and read miracles into a bunch of nothing...

Whatever lesson you'll learn from this, clearly you'll learn them the hard way.

I wish you the best of luck, pal!
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Fine I didn't know that your heads would explode... Yeah you're being practical but do you have to be condescending?
 
knockmeupbaby25 said:
I am definitely not going to approach him about it until he possibly says or does something that tells me that he is interested... But really I am still shocked by him sending me gif of a cock... He knows that I am gay & he supports me... But I am baffled as to why would my straight best friend just out of the blue send me a picture of a dick... Why would a totally straight guy send me a picture of a nice cock if he wasn't interested in me playing with it? The picture isn't him though... Smh Any advice from any straight guy's?
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Why don'y you just ask him??????
 
My straight best friend made a move on me after my wife left and now we’re a couple.
 
I'm straight and my best friend is bi. He's my best friend, he can tease me and it's genuinely funny. If you are best friends, keep him and just say thank you and tell him you got inside your head. Because that's exactly what you're doing.
 
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