my straight crush story

[Cedric]

About 2 1/2 years ago, I moved to start a new job and found myself in a strange city where I didn't know anyone. Because I didn't have any friends, I started hanging out with a straight coworker a lot. I think he knew I liked him, and I think he liked encouraging it because it made him feel good about himself. I know that before I came around, there were two women at work he was pursuing, but they both weren't interested in him.

The long and the short of it is that after 1 1/2 years of obsessing about him, I realized what a loser he was. He wasn't a mean person in any aspect. He was just an insecure person, and he had no social skills. He was also very self-absorbed. He was the type who would talk endlessly about himself with no ability to see if the topic was interesting to the person listening or not. He could always turn something around to make it all about himself. He would also put me down from time to time and make me feel bad about myself.

Last summer at the company picnic, I had two houseguests staying with me at the time--good friends of mine, 1 lesbian and 1 gay man--and brought them along. There, my friends met him and almost busted a gut afterwards laughing at me about how far below my station my crush is. They both agreed between themselves that my crush was socially inept, not that smart, insecure, and ugly. One of them said to me, "this guy would have to take an elevator to get to up a level that was below you," a line that still makes me chuckle to this day.

Anyway, I post this bit about myself to add some perspective to these straight crush stories I've been reading here. These guys are probably not worth your time and attention, especially if they've been inconsiderate or hurtful to you.

 

[mrbubbles69]

I couldn't agree more in!

In high school I had a crush on a straight guy that wasn't all that great. He was good looking, but not as amazing as I had him built up to be. I finally decided to lessen my interaction with him so the feelings would go away. And they did eventually.

I got to the point where I could be his friend with out the feelings. It was so weird cause then I seen all of his flaws. He was still as good looking as before, but he was an idiot, kind of a loser and all he was interested in doing with his life was playing video games.

So I feel like the lesson of that story was that "crushes" blind people from seeing a who someone truly is.

 

[Eagle653]

So I feel like the lesson of that story was that "crushes" blind people from seeing a who someone truly is.

This is really very true.

To Cedric, I'm glad that you seem to have moved on past this guy, and can even see the humor--and appreciate the humor of other's--in being attracted to him at all. But, those crushes are real when they occur, and it's doubly frustrating because if the guy is truly straight, there's no way to win at that game and hurt ensues.

Good luck and glad you've moved on. It's a far healthier place to be!

 

[shaker22]

thanks a lot for sharing, im having a similar problem at the moment so trying to distance myself from the straight crush... hard to do because there's always that glimmer of hope that he is curious and would be interested... but i think it is time to move on.

 

[Cedric]

thanks a lot for sharing, im having a similar problem at the moment so trying to distance myself from the straight crush... hard to do because there's always that glimmer of hope that he is curious and would be interested... but i think it is time to move on.

Yes, as Eagle653 said earlier, when these crushes happen, they are real, but trust that eventually it will pass, and then you will have someone more appropriate to be interested in (i.e., someone who will be interested back!).

 

[slnattak]

I guess. When I crush on somebody I'm still aware of the reality and their many faults/flaws but I love them anyway. I don't care that they hurt other people, when they're around me- we're tight, and we get along and we mesh well. I don't think crushing on somebody blinds you to the reality.

Yeah I noticed the mainstream gay community is kind of too preppy and looks down on nerds. Not really my cup of tea. I would take a gay nerd that has bad social skills and plays too much video games over some prep that tries hard to 'make it in society.' But that's just me. Something is very spiritually soulful about being a 'loser.'

You're being mean. Can't you just say 'I got over my straight crush and I'm happy.' =( NO need to insult him. He is NOT below you. He's just different. You're not better than anybody else. Thinking that you are actually means you have an inferiority complex deep down. There's no need to tear others down to make you feel better but I guess I can also understand the circumstance heh...

 

[Charmander]

I find the sentiment in the original post pretty mean.

 

[aijalon18]

Cedric, I think ur first post was perfect. It is just the tough medicine some gays need to get some self-worth and stop all these pathetic obsessions with straight guys. They only see with rose-colored glasses and don't see the truth. They put straight guys on this pedestal where they are superior to gays and lose touch with reality. Hopefully the people who are complaining will wise up before they end up wasting time and energy on a straight guy.