Here is just what common sense (and personal experience) tells me about relationships and asking for relationship advice:
If you already have to ask another person, no matter what it is, about somebody else, then that innately proves that they are just not the right one for you. This could change, granted. But at the time, you are giving up your personal power on how to relate to that other person- you are not working things out yourself with that person, you are surrendering your personal power over to another by even asking for help in the first place. So you're not being a real man (or woman) about things.
They could give you wise, sage advice but they're ultimately NOT you, so the only thing they could really do to help you would for you to get you to realize what YOU really want to do here. If you don't know yet, then they don't know yet. They have to be a match to what you really wanted deep down otherwise things aren't going to go well.
I have a good gay male friend, let's just call him... Steve. ( not his real name) And I know that Steve really likes me as a friend, because I don't have to ask for anybody else's advice on how to handle Steve. I just accept him 100% selflessly as how he really is, and he does the same with me. I don't ask for anybody's opinion on how to handle him because I have such natural self-confidence on how to handle him myself that it's just completely unnecessary. I trust my own guidance system with him, and that's why I have such a good, eager feeling whenever we communicate with each other.
In fact, I only ask for advice on how to handle people that I don't like I found out. People that have been irritating me or boys that I thought I loved, but it was just a thing where they helped heal some psychological neurosis in my childhood, but it wasn't true love. They didn't ever accept me as how I really was, they tried to change me. =/ See in real love there is no condescending 'help' or playing fixer upper, or acting like you're in a need of a lot of help. There is only mutual support and complete acceptance.
We have a lot of chemistry together, and he makes me happy- even in just a friendship way, and he could possibly be a potential lover but who knows. I'm not concerning myself with that, cause he's such a great friend. Sometimes I forgot how good I have it, because he's such a great person.
So there's your answer. Anytime you have to ask a third party for help in a relationship with somebody, than it ceases to actually be a relationship. You have really just abandoning all your own resources for dealing with people and that's not good. Everybody is kinda forced to figure things out with themselves and 'see how it goes' if they're into somebody. We're not you. I don't know what you want. I just want you to want to know what you want. And get it.
Have a great day.
If you already have to ask another person, no matter what it is, about somebody else, then that innately proves that they are just not the right one for you. This could change, granted. But at the time, you are giving up your personal power on how to relate to that other person- you are not working things out yourself with that person, you are surrendering your personal power over to another by even asking for help in the first place. So you're not being a real man (or woman) about things.
They could give you wise, sage advice but they're ultimately NOT you, so the only thing they could really do to help you would for you to get you to realize what YOU really want to do here. If you don't know yet, then they don't know yet. They have to be a match to what you really wanted deep down otherwise things aren't going to go well.
I have a good gay male friend, let's just call him... Steve. ( not his real name) And I know that Steve really likes me as a friend, because I don't have to ask for anybody else's advice on how to handle Steve. I just accept him 100% selflessly as how he really is, and he does the same with me. I don't ask for anybody's opinion on how to handle him because I have such natural self-confidence on how to handle him myself that it's just completely unnecessary. I trust my own guidance system with him, and that's why I have such a good, eager feeling whenever we communicate with each other.
In fact, I only ask for advice on how to handle people that I don't like I found out. People that have been irritating me or boys that I thought I loved, but it was just a thing where they helped heal some psychological neurosis in my childhood, but it wasn't true love. They didn't ever accept me as how I really was, they tried to change me. =/ See in real love there is no condescending 'help' or playing fixer upper, or acting like you're in a need of a lot of help. There is only mutual support and complete acceptance.
We have a lot of chemistry together, and he makes me happy- even in just a friendship way, and he could possibly be a potential lover but who knows. I'm not concerning myself with that, cause he's such a great friend. Sometimes I forgot how good I have it, because he's such a great person.
So there's your answer. Anytime you have to ask a third party for help in a relationship with somebody, than it ceases to actually be a relationship. You have really just abandoning all your own resources for dealing with people and that's not good. Everybody is kinda forced to figure things out with themselves and 'see how it goes' if they're into somebody. We're not you. I don't know what you want. I just want you to want to know what you want. And get it.
Have a great day.
