My whole story in big lines

[tonyboy]

Hey Friend.
You wrote a beautiful, yet sad, letter here.
You have great courage. It seems that you are finding yourself and accepting you for the beautiful person you really are.
There is no doubt you will find the perfect man, the one to fit your life best.
There are many others here who will reply to you in better words than I am writing. None will have more appreciation for what you have been through and are feeling now.
A handsome and honest man such as yourself is bound to find the happiness he is seeking.
I have always wanted to be a teacher. Congratulations for your great achievements in school. I expect you will be an excellent teacher and have many happy years being one.
You have much to share with the world.

 

[luminum]

You're story's really moving. You must be pretty strong to have gone through all that and still come out trying to put things right. I think you'll do fine, just keep focused on what you want to do. You have a lot of experience and I htink that will make you a good teacher.

Good time come and go, so of course, some days you'll feel great and some days you'll feel depressed and thinkt hat all hope is lost. But on those days, just relax and focus and go to sleep and when you wake up, ut'll be a fresh start and the day can become good again.

I'm sorry that you're parents don't accept you, but a lot of us are in that same boat, so you're not alone and you have plenty of people here to talk to about it.

Thanks for sharing your story ::hug::

 

[Un_Golfo]

Hello OrangeBlood (nice nickname)

I am very touched by your story. Somehow, I feel identified with you in many points.

I am very bad giving advice, I never usually do it. But I will try this time, and I don't know why. Just try to not be sad, you need to push up your selfsteem. Forget about weed, about one night sex, but go for the basics: find yourself comfortable, try practising some sport, enjoy nature. Try to get back to some good old friend. If they were real friends, they will accept you are gay and you will have someone to trust, someone to talk when you feel down. You can have relationships with other guys. This will be positive. But be honest with you and try to find guys that treat you well. You seem to be a nice and smart guy, sure you will find them.

I don't know if you are still living in Groningen. Big cities, university is a good place to know other people. Gay and not gay, it doesn't really matter. Try to find an equilibrium. Friends, mates for some activities. Try to be alone just when you want to.

With your family is more difficult to give advice. It's something too personal. Juts give them time, don't let them make you feel bad, because being gay is not a personal decission. It's just something you feel inside. It's not good or bad.I think time will make them understand. We all hope that.

If you need something, a friend for chatting or emailing, just write me an email or a private message. I will be happy to talk to you when possible.

For sure, everything will be better at the future.

 

[operafan]

Thank you for telling your story. It seems that if you can talk about it (or in this case, write about it) it gives you a chance to look at your own situation as if it was someone else.

I think you have come a long ways in helping yourself because you were able to describe it so clearly. It isn't a happy story but I have the feeling that it is the beginning of a new and happier life for you.

Best wishes on finding just the right boy.

 

[Pegasus69]

Thank you for sharing with us. It is good to hear that you are doing better, but I want to let you know that it will get even better with time. As you grow and mature you will shed those expectations of others and will live the life you are meant to. You will become more confident and your self esteem will soar like a bird. It is sad that your story is a common one among gay men of all ages, but take comfort that you are not alone and there are many great people in this site that are great listeners and many who have gone through the same things and are happy, healthy and living a wonderful life.

You have much that is going to help you with this, you are intelligent, you are in touch with your emotions and you know that you want more and know that it is out there for you to get. You are an attractive young man and that should not be a concern, but more importantly, I get a sense that you are a beautiful person inside as well. Please keep in tough and tell us how your journey is going. All that you have experienced will serve to make you a better and stronger person in the future that lay ahead for you.

Steve

 

[3nipples]

Thank YOU for sharing your story with us.

 

[newkidondagayblock]

HI, I actually cried reading your story, I think it is real (im not trying to belittle your life).

You are very attractive, but still everyone has to go through ups and downs. Im still going thro the same things as you. At this point all I can do is give a big hug and say that everything will be alright, that's what everyone will say.



Hope you have learnt the good things from your past life and make good decision for your future based on them. All (or most) of us here have at some point have been through the things you have gone thro. Each is unique but we have to take comfort that we are not alone to suffer.

All the best, I hope you don't misunderstand me in anyway, I mean the above things in a good way.

I don't want to take advantage of your situation, but if you feel like you can send me a pm.
Bye, take care.

 

[Kyanimal]

THANK YOU! for sharing your story!

Each of us have our own, unique, experiences. And, yet ... we all have so much in common with Thousands (and Thousands) of others. Though it may seem like we are Alone, at given moments, what we are going through is also being shared, by SO Many, World Wide!

That may be "small comfort" when You could really use a HUG! But, it does affirm that "We", YOU, are not weird, strange, "different", odd, or any less of an important, valuable, worthwhile, Human being!! And, Your story, will help others realize that, too!!

You are Young, Very Attractive, but more importantly (and even rarer), Intelligent! You are self aware, and quite capable of making "smart" choices! Your experiences/education (and I don't mean Formal schooling), though sometimes painful, can be a great source of understanding (WISDOM), and a strong base for Your ongoing choices/decisions in assuring a Bright Future! Regrets? Of course! But also a firm footing for stepping forward! You've been there, done that, and, now, KNOW "Better"! YOU are going to be O.K.!!

Wishing You ALL of the Very Best!! And ... THANK YOU! ... again, for sharing Your story!!

Seriously ...

Keep smilin'!!
Chaz

 

[halubtsi]

Well, I actually have very little to say. I have no advice for you. But I just wanted to say thank-you for sharing your story. I can identify with your situation to a certain extent. I am happy to hear that you've turned over a new leaf in your life.

I very recently came out fully, though I told my parents when I was 23. Hindsight is 20/20, and though I would have been "better" for me to have come out at 18, at the time, I really didn't know who I was. The experiences I gained over the next 8 years were priceless and they helped me to discover who and what I am. I don't dwell on the past, and I hope that you won't either. Thanks again for your story.

 

[Riverrick]

Wow, what a story. Really moving, touching. So sad.

You know those lost years - the puberty ones when everyone else was dating and you weren't? A lot of us lost those years also and can never get them back. Sometimes I think that is why we run around acting like adolescents far too long.

Thanks for sharing your story.

 

[thehayesman]

Yay! I agree. I never experienced the hurt of others ridicule or physically harming me. I kept everything hidden well. The journey of my mind was similar, though. I felt "down" and "different" when everyone talked about girls, girls, girls. I would only think of guys to get aroused, but I shoved that away as evil in Jesus' sight. I would just point out to myself how good a Christian I was for not lusting after women's bodies.

Coming out and then taking a step to seek to date guys made me feel peaceful inside. And made me stop searching hysterically for friends. I also used to be closer to my friends than my girlfriend (lots of people commented on it). I'm feeling much better about myself now.

Thanks for your story. We should all live honestly as soon as possible.

 

[kirboy]

Hey Guys-- This is my first "public" reply to a thread-- I just want to say that not only was I deeply affected by Orangeblood's story, but I also am deeply moved by all you guys coming in to suport him and tell him he is not alone. Bravo!! If we stick together we can help ourselves as well as our younger brethren to survive a hostile environment. It is great to know that we have a HUGE community that can make our individual lives more enjoyable! My love to you all....Kirboy

 

[Un_Golfo]

Thx to you for sharing your story and make some of us restate our own story

 

[CoolBlue71]

I read your story, OrangeBlood, and I welcome you to Just Us Boys. I'm not an expert, because I am still coming into my own. But of all I've read, all I can do is encourage you to become a stronger person. While your mother and father have emotionally bailed, perhaps your siblings will be more reciprocal because they're at your age level. Perhaps.

It sounds like you've had no choice but to leave the background in which you were born and bred -- and your struggles and rebellion were a part of your dealings with your plight.

What is great is that you've pointed out how more socially accepted it apparently is in your country. More people being "out." I think that should encourage you in having all-the-more support.

Going back to your family, it could turn out that your mom and dad aren't ready -- who knows with them. Sometimes family is so steeped in their background of tradition and beliefs that it is a matter of tearing themselves away -- or evolving -- that is crippling. I personally find nothing wrong with the tradition -- it's the refusal to recognize the diversities in sexual identity that is a part of the human condition. The word normal is the worse in the English language because what people really mean is correct. Normal should only be used in science -- talk of weather conditions, diagnostics, and so on.

Orangeblood, I wanna say that I am glad you're in your mid-20s because it's easier, compared to say the previous five years, when it comes to acquiring better understanding of conditions, the people, and the world around you. I think you should be happy for yourself in surviving -- and look forward to thriving. You can do this alone, and if there are others who'll back you that'll be more comforting. Sometimes you've got problems that speak to yourself -- but for others it is not your responsiblility to cater to, nor appease, them. Your parents aren't in your shoes -- so you have it a lot more difficult than they do in terms of your sexual identity. (Don't feel too sorry for them. No matter how much you love them. Your situation is rougher than theirs.)

Before I end this, I wanna tell you that I've checked out your gallery. Those pictures are of you, correct? If yes, than you are very good-looking. Nice ass, too. And I hope you start looking more at the positive -- and keep the negatives in perspective while no longer letting such matters eat your insides out.

All the best to you, OrangeBlood!

 

[puppy]

I was beautiful!!!

 

[bi-one]

Thank you OB.

 

[slobone]

Great story, OrangeBlood, thanks for being so honest. As you've already discovered, the most important part of coming out is coming out to yourself. If you understand that being gay is really just the same as being straight, only you happen to like guys instead of girls, you will project that idea out to whoever you meet, and they will accept you too. (Of course I know it's not that simple, but that's where you should start.)

It would probably help to meet more gay people at Groningen who will support you. Do you know about this website:

http://www.gaygroningen.info/

It's in Dutch. I'm sure there are other sites too. Good luck!

 

[Croynan]

removed/inapproptriate/eM.

 

[looseliam]

It's just Croynan. Don't worry.

Anyway, how have you been? Any updates?

 

[operafan]

yeah I quit school

Why? You know we are all pulling for you.