Coming out was the best thing I ever did for myself. I would not be who I am today if I had not. I would not have the best boyfriend in the world if I had not. I would not have my job today if I had not come out Before I came out, I was in denial of everything and tried so hard to be normal and attempted online dating with girls. I got to the point where I was just so sad and depressed. I frequented these forums for years but thought it was just some phase or something. At the age of 22, I was still living with my parents, working full time and going for my Masters.
One day, I signed up on manhunt.net purley because I was horny and wanted to try to meet up with someone for low key fun. I knew that by signing up on that site, I had to be something else other than straight but still wanted to deny that. That day, I flew around to clear my mind. When I landed, I went home and logged on. I started talking to my future roomate/great friend online. Later that evening, I went to his apartment and we talked a lot about being gay. I came home, looked in the mirror and said... "I'm gay." That was all. I still wanted to deny it and could not accept it yet. So, I made a compromise with myself and said I was bi.
A few days later, I came out to my mom as bi. We cried, and she really didn't say much. I asked her not to tell my dad as I knew he would not take it well. Fast forward a week... I went out with my new friend and his friend and we just spent the evening around downtown Milwaukee. My dad called and was worried since I'm never out w/ friends. I finally told him I was old enough to have my own life and not to worry. That night, my mom told my dad. The next day we had a family discussion. That involved a lot of "Are you sure?" "How do you know?" "What have you done sexually to know?" "You never gave girls a chance!" My dad is a pilot and said... "When your mother told me, all I could think about was you having sex with a guy. Good thing I was flying with a co-pilot who knew what he was doing because I couldnt think straight." That still hurts... but alas.
I knew I couldn't stay at home so I moved out. My friend had an open room in his apartment and I moved in. We had a good time and became close friends. Sadly, he was a slob and I had to move out. During the time I was there, I went on dates with a few guys. Nothing amounted to anything but I had fun and allowed myself to experience things. I ended up moving back into my parents house for a few months until I found something I could afford on my own. While I lived with my parents, I ended up dating more and refused to let their ways keep me from living my life. I ended up getting a boyfriend which lasted a few months. That went sour when I found him cheating and being a jerk.
I was happy being single and being me. For a while, I was talking to my now current boyfriend online. When he found out I was single we talked more. He remembered my interest in aviation and other things we talked about over 10 months since then. He came over to my place in February and we went to the airport for our first date! He likes airplanes too! I took him onto an airplane that I work with and he thought it was awesome! During our date, I told him I never make the first moves. He said he never did either. Back at my place, he said: "Here's a first move for you..." and he kissed me! We spent the next few hours cuddling and kissing. It was such an amazing day. He left and went to hang out with his friends at the Milwaukee Bucks Basketball game. The next day, he came over again. I made him dinner and we cuddled on the couch listening to music. He told me he didn't think of himself as single anymore. We decided that on February 7th, we'd be boyfriends. It seemed soon, but we had been talking for a long time online and we meshed so well! Our lips were like one, our likes were like one and we both love aviation! Over the next few months we kept dating, seeing each other, etc etc etc - things boyfriends do.
A few months into our relationship, I got a call from an airline I had applied for that I loved. I worked for a different airline back in Milwaukee but just was not happy with my job and needed a change as the airline was taking a turn for the worse. My passion is in the aviation world and that's where I need to be. I told my boyfriend about it and he completely understood. He recognized my passion and desire to succeed in the industry and stayed by my side during my interview process. The only catch was, the job was in Dallas. I wanted to say no to any offer I'd receive because I wanted to be with him. We both knew we had to do what was right for each other and if I got an offer, I'd move to Dallas. I didn't want this to end our relationship... We both wanted to make us work!! A week before my interview, he took me shopping for a suit. The night before my interview, he came over to be w/ me and help iron and get me prepped for the interview. The day of the interview, he drove me to the airport and wished me well. My interview went well in Dallas that day and he picked me back up in Milwaukee later that night and we spent the night together again. Things kept at their normal routine for a month while I waited to see if I was hired.
On a Friday morning, I was laying in bed with my boyfriend after a night out with friends. I didn't sleep well and he had the day off so I said... "Screw it, i'm calling into work." Not 10 minutes later, I got a call with the job offer. I was so excited to have been offered a job at the airline of my dreams! He was really excited for me too and his support was amazing! We had a great weekend together as well as with friends! The next three weeks were very difficult and weeks I do not want to re-live. I had to give my notice at work in Milwaukee, pack up my apartment, say goodbye to family and friends, and spend one last night in Milwaukee with my boyfriend. The last night we slept in my empty apartment which only had my bed and a few sheets. He went to work while I packed the rest of my stuff up in the UHAUL. He picked me up for lunch and we ate close by. After that, he dropped me back off at my apartment and we said our goodbyes. It was so so so hard!!! I hated watching him drive away. I went up to my empty apartment and just burst into tears (as I am now actually). I told myself it wasn't the end. It was just the beginning... I picked myself up and said goodbye to my place. Over the next 48 hours, my dad and I drove from Milwaukee to Dallas (non-stop).
So here I am, in Dallas. I'm happy with my airline (granted I am looking to change departments). I want to retire from here. It's the best place I've ever worked and we have so much fun. My boyfriend is still living in Milwaukee and we're doing well. For being so far apart, we see each other often. Over the summer I flew up to Milwaukee most weekends except two. After the summer my schedule changed so I've only been able to fly up to see him on Wednesday nights. While the constant travel is annoying at times and stressful with heavy passenger loads on our aircraft, it's so worth it being able to hold him in my arms and kiss him. He travels on my passes almost once a month or so to visit me for a weekend. We talk on the phone most nights when we're not out with friends and text good morning every day.
At this point, there are no plans to move to the same city. It's a goal we have at some point in our lives... but nothing is set in stone. That is a difficult thing for me because there's no end date to our long term relationship. However, being able to fly back and forth for free makes it so much easier. He wants to change jobs and wants to get his masters in Chicago. I am fully supporting him like he did for me when I made my choice to move here. As with all couples, there have been some disagreements, but with open and honest communication as well as TRUST, things have a way of working themselves out. Love also helps too!
The sex is always great with him but after not seeing him for a while... lets just say it feels like internal fireworks!
I came back from Milwaukee today. I cried on the flight back as I had not been able to see him for three weeks. I just flew in yesterday at noon and only had the night to see him. It was amazing. I didn't want it to end. But, next week I'll be flying back for TWO nights!!
Sorry for the long story... I think that was more than what most of you wanted to read/hear, but I enjoyed telling it.
For those of you with significant others near or far, don't take for granted what you have and times you share together. Cherish those special moments, laugh and live!
For those of you coming out or accepting yourselves, I know what it's like. A lot of people here will support you. You can't live your life in the eyes of someone else. You can't deny yourself of who you are. You can be scared. You can cry. You can ask for support. As hard as it is, sometimes you have to look in the mirror and say: "I'm gay."
Cheers!
Aaron
P.S. Did I mention I miss my boyfriend like CRAZY!?!?!
One day, I signed up on manhunt.net purley because I was horny and wanted to try to meet up with someone for low key fun. I knew that by signing up on that site, I had to be something else other than straight but still wanted to deny that. That day, I flew around to clear my mind. When I landed, I went home and logged on. I started talking to my future roomate/great friend online. Later that evening, I went to his apartment and we talked a lot about being gay. I came home, looked in the mirror and said... "I'm gay." That was all. I still wanted to deny it and could not accept it yet. So, I made a compromise with myself and said I was bi.
A few days later, I came out to my mom as bi. We cried, and she really didn't say much. I asked her not to tell my dad as I knew he would not take it well. Fast forward a week... I went out with my new friend and his friend and we just spent the evening around downtown Milwaukee. My dad called and was worried since I'm never out w/ friends. I finally told him I was old enough to have my own life and not to worry. That night, my mom told my dad. The next day we had a family discussion. That involved a lot of "Are you sure?" "How do you know?" "What have you done sexually to know?" "You never gave girls a chance!" My dad is a pilot and said... "When your mother told me, all I could think about was you having sex with a guy. Good thing I was flying with a co-pilot who knew what he was doing because I couldnt think straight." That still hurts... but alas.
I knew I couldn't stay at home so I moved out. My friend had an open room in his apartment and I moved in. We had a good time and became close friends. Sadly, he was a slob and I had to move out. During the time I was there, I went on dates with a few guys. Nothing amounted to anything but I had fun and allowed myself to experience things. I ended up moving back into my parents house for a few months until I found something I could afford on my own. While I lived with my parents, I ended up dating more and refused to let their ways keep me from living my life. I ended up getting a boyfriend which lasted a few months. That went sour when I found him cheating and being a jerk.
I was happy being single and being me. For a while, I was talking to my now current boyfriend online. When he found out I was single we talked more. He remembered my interest in aviation and other things we talked about over 10 months since then. He came over to my place in February and we went to the airport for our first date! He likes airplanes too! I took him onto an airplane that I work with and he thought it was awesome! During our date, I told him I never make the first moves. He said he never did either. Back at my place, he said: "Here's a first move for you..." and he kissed me! We spent the next few hours cuddling and kissing. It was such an amazing day. He left and went to hang out with his friends at the Milwaukee Bucks Basketball game. The next day, he came over again. I made him dinner and we cuddled on the couch listening to music. He told me he didn't think of himself as single anymore. We decided that on February 7th, we'd be boyfriends. It seemed soon, but we had been talking for a long time online and we meshed so well! Our lips were like one, our likes were like one and we both love aviation! Over the next few months we kept dating, seeing each other, etc etc etc - things boyfriends do.
A few months into our relationship, I got a call from an airline I had applied for that I loved. I worked for a different airline back in Milwaukee but just was not happy with my job and needed a change as the airline was taking a turn for the worse. My passion is in the aviation world and that's where I need to be. I told my boyfriend about it and he completely understood. He recognized my passion and desire to succeed in the industry and stayed by my side during my interview process. The only catch was, the job was in Dallas. I wanted to say no to any offer I'd receive because I wanted to be with him. We both knew we had to do what was right for each other and if I got an offer, I'd move to Dallas. I didn't want this to end our relationship... We both wanted to make us work!! A week before my interview, he took me shopping for a suit. The night before my interview, he came over to be w/ me and help iron and get me prepped for the interview. The day of the interview, he drove me to the airport and wished me well. My interview went well in Dallas that day and he picked me back up in Milwaukee later that night and we spent the night together again. Things kept at their normal routine for a month while I waited to see if I was hired.
On a Friday morning, I was laying in bed with my boyfriend after a night out with friends. I didn't sleep well and he had the day off so I said... "Screw it, i'm calling into work." Not 10 minutes later, I got a call with the job offer. I was so excited to have been offered a job at the airline of my dreams! He was really excited for me too and his support was amazing! We had a great weekend together as well as with friends! The next three weeks were very difficult and weeks I do not want to re-live. I had to give my notice at work in Milwaukee, pack up my apartment, say goodbye to family and friends, and spend one last night in Milwaukee with my boyfriend. The last night we slept in my empty apartment which only had my bed and a few sheets. He went to work while I packed the rest of my stuff up in the UHAUL. He picked me up for lunch and we ate close by. After that, he dropped me back off at my apartment and we said our goodbyes. It was so so so hard!!! I hated watching him drive away. I went up to my empty apartment and just burst into tears (as I am now actually). I told myself it wasn't the end. It was just the beginning... I picked myself up and said goodbye to my place. Over the next 48 hours, my dad and I drove from Milwaukee to Dallas (non-stop).
So here I am, in Dallas. I'm happy with my airline (granted I am looking to change departments). I want to retire from here. It's the best place I've ever worked and we have so much fun. My boyfriend is still living in Milwaukee and we're doing well. For being so far apart, we see each other often. Over the summer I flew up to Milwaukee most weekends except two. After the summer my schedule changed so I've only been able to fly up to see him on Wednesday nights. While the constant travel is annoying at times and stressful with heavy passenger loads on our aircraft, it's so worth it being able to hold him in my arms and kiss him. He travels on my passes almost once a month or so to visit me for a weekend. We talk on the phone most nights when we're not out with friends and text good morning every day.
At this point, there are no plans to move to the same city. It's a goal we have at some point in our lives... but nothing is set in stone. That is a difficult thing for me because there's no end date to our long term relationship. However, being able to fly back and forth for free makes it so much easier. He wants to change jobs and wants to get his masters in Chicago. I am fully supporting him like he did for me when I made my choice to move here. As with all couples, there have been some disagreements, but with open and honest communication as well as TRUST, things have a way of working themselves out. Love also helps too!
The sex is always great with him but after not seeing him for a while... lets just say it feels like internal fireworks!I came back from Milwaukee today. I cried on the flight back as I had not been able to see him for three weeks. I just flew in yesterday at noon and only had the night to see him. It was amazing. I didn't want it to end. But, next week I'll be flying back for TWO nights!!
Sorry for the long story... I think that was more than what most of you wanted to read/hear, but I enjoyed telling it.
For those of you with significant others near or far, don't take for granted what you have and times you share together. Cherish those special moments, laugh and live!
For those of you coming out or accepting yourselves, I know what it's like. A lot of people here will support you. You can't live your life in the eyes of someone else. You can't deny yourself of who you are. You can be scared. You can cry. You can ask for support. As hard as it is, sometimes you have to look in the mirror and say: "I'm gay."
Cheers!
Aaron
P.S. Did I mention I miss my boyfriend like CRAZY!?!?!
My other friends however know about it.
I was 45 when I came out.How about you?