Need help with a friend...

[FloridaBoi]

Okay, My best friend is a girl. I am also very good friends with her boyfriend, That came to be because his brother is also gay and his brother and I were friends for a short while.

Ok so on to the problem, When she and I hang out shes always talking to other guys on the phone, she tells them that shes single and sometimes she even goes out and meets these guys. She even got pregnant last month by another guy but told her boyfriend that it was his when it actually wasnt but she went on to have a miscarriage which helped her with her lie.

The problem is, I am also really good friends with her boyfriend and he doesnt have neone to talk to so hes always trying to pull me to the side and talk to me about things that he suspects might be going on with her and he is always asking me if I know anything. I always get myself out of the situation, I try to comfort him without saying anything which makes me feel like sh!t because now I am having to lie to him because of her.

I get confused because she turns back around and says how much she loves him and talking about getting married and having a baby with him but turns back around and does that same sh!t over again.

I feel really bad for him, I look up to him like an older brother, He was there for me when I came out and helped me thru the issues with my family. He has always been honest to me and has never did nething to hurt me. So my question is WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO HERE! Should I tell him the truth and risk losing my best friend or should I keep going along with her and act like everything is fine. Hes always upset crying, It makes me feel terrible because I see how much in love he is with her and I try to make her see that hoping she will treat him better but I just dont know. I am really confused.

I have been weighing my options and it seems like to me either way I lean I am going to be the one that loses. If I keep it quiet hes going to find out sooner or later and hate me, If I tell him, hes going to lose it and go to her and shes going to end up knowing it was me that told him and I can just see it blowing up in my face.

I dont know what to do guys please help me! I love them both they are like family to me, Sometimes I feel like just breaking my friendship with both of them now before it gets any worse.!!

 

[G-Lexington]

Well, if you're going to be forced to play favorites - and it seems headed in that direction - I know which side I'D pick. But why not simply confront your female friend about it? Say, "Look, your boyfriend is getting very suspcious...and for good reason. If you don't want anything getting back to him, can you make sure you don't do anything around me that can get back to him?" If she tells you that if you were her friend, you wouldn't tell him anything, just say "And if you were MY friend, you wouldn't put me in a position where I'd have to choose between you."

Lex

 

[Narcissism is fun]

"I'd rather be hated for what I am than loved for something I'm not."

Nice sig, it applies really well here, if you don't want to cover for her, then tell her you won't do it anymore. Being friends with someone is great, but friends shouldn't act the way she has.

 

[backpacker]

Once again, Lex gives perfect advice. She is neither respecting her bf nor you the way she is carrying on. I would talk to her seriously about breaking up or having an open relationship with the guy. She obviously isn't ready for a serious relationship.

If it comes down to picking one or the other, I would definitely pick the guy. After all, she has her true colors. If she will treat her serious bf like this, she will treat her friends in the same manner. In fact, she is already treating you like that by putting you in a position to keep secrets from a person she knows is a good friend of yours.

 

[kramer362]

I would talk to the female friend and tell her she's your best friend but you can't believe what she's doing and she's being a bad friend by putting you in a position to lie, especially to a good guy. I would try avoid getting involved in their troubles but maybe just imply to her boyfriend that you get the impression somethings going on as well, but don't say it for sure. But either way you should probably talk to her before him.

But that might be shitty advice listen to what everyone else says

 

[KaraBulut]

It sounds like you're confused about which one is your "best friend".

This girl has put you in a difficult position- covering up her lies. Do you really want a "best friend" who is a slut and a liar and hurts people who care about her?

It sounds like the boyfriend is the better friend.

 

[Swallowmysperm]

I think you should tell your friend, that if she doesnt tell him you will. No one deserves to be cheated on. its just not fair to him. If she lies to him, there is a chance she could lie to you too.

 

[FloridaBoi]

He called me this morning and we talked until the battery on my cell phone went dead. I didnt come straight out and tell him everything that I know but I told him that in my opinion I think he should move on with his life and find someone thats going to treat him the way he deserves to be treated.

I know in my heart he is the better friend but I love her so much, we've been thru so much together. I feel like I did something wrong by telling him that but when he told me that she lied and told him that she was meeting me last night to go shopping which was a complete lie, I dont feel so bad now that I know she is using me to cover up her sh!t.

Its just a seriously bad situation, someones going to end up getting hurt before its over.

I do have to say though that after we talked it felt so much better like a weight had been lifted.

Neways, Thanks guys!
I hope I am doing the right thing.


-Matthew