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need some help >_<

M

max-19

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Hi everyone

I have complicated relationship with my best friend ( at least i think he is ) I am in love with him I love him too much sometimes i hope that he is my bf and the problem is he is not gay but we had sex almost every week he called me just to have sex he loves having sex with girl and I am the only boy he had sex with i don't know why

can anyone tell me what to do I am so in love with him
 
I suppose the best thing might be to enjoy the moment and realize that it will never be anything more deep than physical sex. You do not mention whether there is any interaction between you in other areas of life.

What you should do, is find someone that will view you as an entire person and who will create a complete relationship with you. You should love yourself enough to know when you are being used and when you are investing in a long-term relationship. I do think he is using you and, to be fair, you are using him. However, he has dictated the rules and boundaries of the relationship and they are not what you want. I doubt he will change. Will you?

do celebrate your life,
take care of yourself,
Rand
 
Well, this sounds like one of those situations where you do know what to do, you just want someone to tell you not to do it.

Walk away.
 
Tell him you love him and see how he reacts - explain that love can happen between mates and ask him how he feels about your saying that. All you can do is try. You may get hurt by the answer so be prepared for that. If he says that having you as a friend and an occasional sex partner is all he wants and you are comfortable with that then you may be able to carry it on but also if you looking for a deeper and closer emotional attachment to a person then you will have to look elsewhere for that. Good luck and may your life be fullfilling on all levels. Cheers, G
 
Rand said:
I suppose the best thing might be to enjoy the moment and realize that it will never be anything more deep than physical sex. You do not mention whether there is any interaction between you in other areas of life.

What you should do, is find someone that will view you as an entire person and who will create a complete relationship with you. You should love yourself enough to know when you are being used and when you are investing in a long-term relationship. I do think he is using you and, to be fair, you are using him. However, he has dictated the rules and boundaries of the relationship and they are not what you want. I doubt he will change. Will you?

do celebrate your life,
take care of yourself,
Rand
Click to expand...

well said.

eM](*,)
 
max-19 said:
... almost every week he called me just to have sex ...I am the only boy he had sex with i don't know why
Click to expand...

Why? Because you say "yes" every time he calls.

The fact that you're posting here implies that you're not totally happy being just a "booty call" to someone who is taking advantage of your friendship.

If you're not happy, then say, "Either it's a relationship and I get what I want... or you can find someone else to use but I'm not satisfied with the way things are".

Find your self-respect. Find someone who is interested in your needs. Find someone who can provide what you're looking for.
 
Stop having sex with him, no good can come of it...I know from experience. You may think that one day he'll change his mind or that you can see signs that he may want more, but it's all in your head. You're gonna get hurt, he is taking advantage of you.
 
The key is to not be totally dependent upon him to meet all your gay needs. Try to do something every day to get on with your gay life. Safe sex for me also implies safe mental and emotion health. If you are doing too much waiting and doing nothing while you wait this works against your mental and emotional health. It can be hot to be somebody's cum dump, but only if it doesn't throw you into despair. It's a whole different picture if you are equals in a fuck buddy arrangement.

The key is in not becoming locked into an arrangement where you think crumbs are better than not having anything, but then being imobilized and not functioning in other areas of your life.

When you are ready to ge a little stronger tell him you are not available when he wants sex. Know what the consequences might be, but hopefully you'll be on your way toword meeting more available guys. It's very easy to fall into a rut which could last years.
 
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