Need some sound advice or reassurance

[TX-Beau]

Look, if everything you said in here is accurate, and not just your perception of it, and if there is really nothing else going on that you haven't told us - well, he blew something tiny into a huge conflict and dropped all the blame in your lap; and if he's doing that - and hasn't behaved like that all along, you have problems hope and a sunny outlook aren't going to fix.

You know, some guys tend to become huge assholes when they don't want to be the bad guy in a break up. If he want's out, and doesn't have the balls to tell you - well, this is what that looks like.

And IF that's the case, the decision has been made for you and no matter what you do, or what you say, short of telling him it's over, he's gonna make a scene about it - push you until you've had enough, or simply ignore you until you go away.

It doesn't matter if he cheated or not, if he wants out, you can string yourself along, or you can confront him and move on.

And if HE won't talk - that's pretty much it.

Hopefully I'm wrong, but you've got some kind of problem, and if you can't talk it out with him - rationally, no screaming hysterics, then you're doomed anyway.

 

[justsimon]

I can offer a different perspective on this situation.

On Halloween, my brother, his wife and I went to a gay bar to meet some friends. I called my girlfriend to say goodnight (we're in an LDR, as well and she was on a trip with her mom so she couldn't talk long).

My gf was grumpy when she answered the phone and when she found out where I was, she became even grumpier. She ended the call with, "Don't go home with anyone."

I was pretty upset about it for quite some time. We'd been having problems anyway and there were other issues in play. She knows I would never cheat on her (even if I were single, it's unlikely I'd go home with someone I met in a club) and she was clearly feeding off of her own insecurities. We've talked about and resolved the situation (she admitted to being passive aggressive and apologized).

If we'd been doing well at the time, the comment would have been said jokingly and I would have responded in kind. Your situation is made more complicated because you were texting and neither of you could read a tone of voice. You definitely need to talk over the phone or in person.