Not sure what to do

[BiGuy1970]

Just before I sold my house, a neighbor (male) came onto me. It was a trucker come on. (overly adjusting their crotch). I responded by taking a leak where he could see my dick (in the back yard) (I lived in the country, so that's normal). We played around a few times. I even stuck it to him once a few months ago.

The problem is, I'm attracted to men in their 20's to their mid 40's. I dont like hair or big guts. I'm 50 and he's close to 70. A bit over weight. He's married, in the closet and his wife never leaves their house.

He bugs the hell out of me all the time about another hook up. I have to force a different subject of conversation, almost every time we talk. When I do, he looses interest in the topic.

He has another hook up he goes and see's. Now he's inviting me to either join them. Or go to a gay campground this coming weekend. Both options I'm not opposed to. It's just that's all he wants to talk about.

I'm almost to the point to telling him to knock it off. That I'll let him know when I wanna/can hook up.

Anyone else had this problem? I've turned him down so many times now, that most people would've just moved on. He knows I'm wanting to move away from this town, so I can find a partner and new friends. I don't want to loose him as a friend. And even a hook up. We always practice safe sex.

 

[Naughty_Monkey]

I've turned him down so many times now, that most people would've just moved on. .... I don't want to loose him as a friend. And even a hook up.

It sounds like you're sending mixed messages - you're telling us you don't find him attractive and don't want to have sex any more with him, but you also want to keep him as "a hook-up". I'm confused, so I'm sure he is too. Be direct with what you want from him. Just friends or friends with benefits? Be honest with him.

 

[aaggii]

Have you tried actually telling him you are not interested anymore? If you think it will hurt him, tell him you are getting serious with someone at the moment and you want to focus on that.

 

[KaraBulut]

...Anyone else had this problem? I've turned him down so many times now, that most people would've just moved on. He knows I'm wanting to move away from this town, so I can find a partner and new friends. I don't want to loose him as a friend. And even a hook up. We always practice safe sex.

There's something a little unsettling about the situation. He's likely to keep pestering you until you make it clear that it's not going to happen.

Maybe the best option is to just put it in terms of, "No, I would rather keep a good friend and not mess that up." If he keeps pushing the issue, it should tell you that he doesn't value maintaining the friendship, which should make it easier for you to move on and find the person that you're looking for.

 

[mcbrion]

Be honest and tell him you enjoyed it, but you just don't want that kind of relationship anymore.
Also, if he loses interest when you change the subject, it should be obvious he mainly (only?) wants you for sex. And he tunes you out when you try to talk about something else. That's a pretty clear sign he's not interested in "you," just the sex. So, why do you have misgivings?
Just say "I'm just not into that with you anymore, man," and shrug your shoulders as if to say, "sorry." If he presses you, he's trying to manipulate you. Period. Just repeat what you said. He'll get the message. I suspect he'll act angry. So what??? Just keep saying, "sorry."