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not sure where to post this - but i need advice
B

BTWbaby

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okay so i'm 19 and gay, not bi or straight. i need advice. i am very inexperienced (only had legit sex once in years ago in high school, and topped; i've never bottomed) but have always felt i would be a vers or vers. bottom. however, i recently had a few hookups and them fingering me just never felt good, it felt pretty uncomfortable honestly. i have enjoyed it when i've done it occasionally to myself though - never like OMG AMAZING, but it felt good and improved my orgasm. my friend i hooked up with, aside from the fingering, was also rimming me, and by surprise, stuck his dick in my ass (a pretty thick dick at that) and it hurt really bad and i was like NOPE. i don't think there was really enough prep and i wasn't relaxed enough, but like idk. soo I'm supposed to have legit sex tomorrow, try to anyway. any advice on taking a peen? plz helppp :)
 
well sex is not about being top orr bottom.. its about enjoying it.. anyways u can use lubricant.. it initially pains later feels great something inside ur ass coming in and out..
 
and ya i have always topped.. just my bottom friends say the above!!
 
Practice with yourself. You like one of your fingers in you, work up to two and so on. Use toys or carrots that gradually increase in size. You seem to want to be fucked, and I've yet to meet a bottom that had the same issues you did that didn't find a way by working up to it.
 
Practice always makes perfect :)

Don't rush things and don't 'make' it happen. Let someone who you have been to bed with several times try. You will be much more relaxed with them
 
No real way to know if you're cut out for taking dick or not. You just have to try it and work through it and see what happens.

I wouldn't try to base all future experiences on that one time w/your friend who didn't give you any warning.

Most importantly you have to relax. Put it out of your mind in assuming that it's going to hurt real bad or be uncomfortable, based on what your friend did to you.

I'd suggest the first thing you do is tell the guy you're going to be with that it IS your first "real" time and you need him to work with you and LISTEN TO WHAT YOU'RE TELLING HIM as it happens.

Lots of GOOD lube is a must. Fingers first for a while. 1, 2, even 3, in and out in the beginning. Relaxing and getting used to it is most important step. Even some toys would be a good idea, if you've got that kind of a setting and the time. Getting relaxed and "broken in" a little will make all the difference.

Set up the situation ahead of time if you can and make sure you're in a comfortable place, and that you both have plenty of time. Make sure he listens to you. If you're uncomfortable and you tell him that you are and he doesn't back off or stop, and keeps hurting you, then tell him to fuck off, put on your clothes and split. No reason to do this with a guy who isn't respecting and listening to you.

You'll just have to work through it. Some guys have no real problems, others just can't do it. And that's too bad, because it's an awesome feeling to have a dude in you like that.

So, to sort of summarize it all:

UNDERSTANDING: Make sure you talk it out ahead of the game. Let this guy know you're a newbie to this, and that you want to do it, but you don't want to be hurt or made uncomfortable. He HAS to agree to make this about YOU, and him, not just him.

TIME: Make sure you have plenty of time.

ENVIRONMENT: Make sure you're in a relaxed, inviting environment that's comfortable for both of you. You really can't do this the first time in a car or behind the dumpster in an alley somewhere, and expect positive results.

LUBE: Have a quality lube in large quantity on hand and don't be afraid to use it. (AstroGlide is the best, I think. You can get it at Walmart) lol VASELINE and petroleum based lubes destroy condoms, use the stuff MADE for this event, please)

STRETCH: Work fingers and/or other things slowly in and out of your hole to help it relax and stretch.

LISTEN: Make sure he listens to you and does what you ask him to do.

GO SLOW: There's no rush. Once you get it in and get used to it, then you can start working at speed and depth, etc.

POSITION: My first time, I had the guy on his back so I could get on his dick at MY own pace and control. You can experiment with positions.

Just like anything new or first time - you just have to go easy and listen to your body.

Good luck my man!
 
Matt: you Sir, nicely summed up the thing.
Just one addition to that: breathe! if you control your breath, you can have fun for hours without getting tired (just like Sport).
 
You'll like it much better if he rims you good. My first time bottoming, the guy was an expert rimmer. I took him with little problem, and his cock was 9!"
 
ZeFrenchy said:
Matt: you Sir, nicely summed up the thing.
Just one addition to that: breathe! if you control your breath, you can have fun for hours without getting tired (just like Sport).
Click to expand...

Thanks! And you're right - BREATHE! Very import to control and relax the body and the right muscles. ..|
 
Wow, you guys are awesome. :D Thanks. I'm still debating whether or not I'm actually going to do it. I'm gonna be 20 next month though, I feel like this needs to happen haha. Thanks for the advice though! I really appreciate it. Whether I do it now or later, I will definitely listen to all of this.
 
HI baby!!! :wave:

Seriously -- from you OP, you CANNOT know whether or not you're going to like it...

And don't even come to a decisive conclusion based on tonights experience...

Some guys are just ROUGH in general -- and that is sometimes NOT fun -- they have to be somewhat good at topping as well... ;)

The initial pain of insertion USUALLY goes away FAIRLY QUICKLY -- and then it is ALL fun...

From YOUR posted experience -- I can see how a bad fingering -- and a bad initial fuck CAN lead you into thinking you cannot bottom...

BUT, don't give up so easily!!!

HAVE FUN!!!

:):):)
 
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