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Now I need advice, guys!

J

Just_Believe18

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Now, I've been a regular member of this sub-forum for a very long time. I hope my input has helped a lot of you resolve your differences and needs. This time, I need some advice! Ok, here we go. This is about a hot guy at the gym and I'm not sure how to read into this (long-winded, bare with me).

Tonight, I went to the gym. It was like any other night, working out, lots of cute guys, etc. While I was using the machines, I noticed this very cute guy who frequently walked past me. Every time he'd walk past, he'd briefly make quick eye contact with me. So I was having fun checking him out every time he'd walk by. Eventually, I noticed he was working out at the same machine next to me. He'd finish a set, then walk to the front of the gym and then back to the machine to see me.

After I was done with the incline, I moved to the decline machine next to it. Then I notice he moves to the decline machine I was just on. As I was finishing my 2nd set, all of a sudden he turns and asks me how my weight lifting is going. Surprised, I turned my head and started talking to him.

Ok guys, here's his stats. He's about 6'2'', 150+ pounds, blonde, chistled face, a beautiful body under his white T-shirt and shorts. Very fine leg hair (didn't even notice arm hair). Basically, he's the equivalent to a Corbin Fisher model. Or the most beautiful looking Mormon stereotype you've ever seen. Seriously.

So he starts talking to me about weight lifting, the gym, eating habits, etc. He asks how old I was. When I told him 21, he laughed and said, "Wow, you're the same age as me but you look so much younger." And the conversation doesn't stop. We're not even using the machines. Every time I'd answer what kind of body I wanted or how long I've been at the gym, he'd keep the conversation going by asking a new question. Then he tells me he works at F______ and the fantasy in my mind explodes.

I remembered him from shopping at F______! He was the produce boy I'd always get excited to see every time I went to go pick out bananas. And here we were, at the gym, and he's talking my ear off. I told him I recognized him and he thought that was cool saying, "oh wow, small town. Really small town." Meanwhile, he's constantly sucking the side of his finger because he cut it lifting and it's so cute in a vampiric way.

But then.. my ride shows up to interrupt the conversation to tell me he's exhausted and doesn't want to work out tonight and was going home. AGHGHHHH!!! So I have to go and I introduce myself, shake his hand and tell him I'll see him next time. He seemed disappointed by the interruption and abrupt departure.


Ok. So, what happened here? Am I being a typical gay and reading too much into this guy? Let me say this: I've never had a single guy EVER come up to me at the gym and just start chatting. I've had eye sex but never this level of intensity. The way he started working out next me and just instigated conversation is a strategy I would use to get to a guy. Furthermore, he wouldn't stop the conversation. He kept it going for a solid 10-15 minutes and stopped working out. If I had more time, I knew I could have had his number.

So what should I do? I'm planning to go again tomorrow. I hope he's there. I'm thinking of starting chit chat with him again and then ask for his number or e-mail address so I can "get more tips" from him about weight lifting. Good idea? Can you think of something better? Is there any kind of subtle conversation I can use to see if he's interested? He instigated it but I don't want to push too hard and scare him away. Again, he could be a really nice straight guy (but he wasn't talking to anyone else at the gym).
 
Souns to me like he was as happy with you coming into F______ as you were seeing him there while shopping. You've def got a green light...I'd go back to that gym every day until I saw him again, 4 sure. Good luck!
 
Hmmm, my thoughts on the matter:

1. Straight guys who go to work out don't even notice other guys exist unless they are their friends and they came together.

2. If they do notice someone other than themselves, they don't continue looking. And they don't strike up conversations with strangers. And they certainly don't remark on how young a guy looks. Or continue to suck their fingers, no matter how much it hurts--it's a gym; pain is a badge of honor.

3. Have you seen your own pictures in your gallery??? Of course he was interested in you! :)

I think your instincts are right on. Go back, say "hey," see if he pursues conversation again. If he seems a little gun-shy, then you ask some questions. Or ask him to spot you on some equipment. Ask him about his physical regimen or tips on nutrition. Play it cool, but not aloof. I'm thinking if he was interested enough to talk to you today, he will again tomorrow.

Good luck...and for God's sake, update us tomorrow! ..|
 
That's what intrigues me Killjoke. It's not typical straight behavior. Eye sex can mean anything but to corner me in a secluded area of the gym and instigate conversation is very unusual.

The key was just the way he started the conversation. Quick, abrupt, and with a question. Almost nervous to break the ice. But it just flowed after that. The conversation only ended because I HAD to go.

I will keep everyone updated. The moment I encounter him again I'll let you know. Any other conversation tips?
 
The best conversation tips I can think of are:

Listen, listen, listen

Don't try to think of what to say--when you go into your head, you fall out of the conversation. Just let it flow naturally.

Be genuinely interested in what's he saying.

Relax, be yourself, and remember--he's already interested. You don't have to try.
 
I think you must go and buy some more bananas from him at the store. Thats a great way to go 'oh wow, what a coincidence that we are bumping into each other again, are your bananas ripe and firm today,etc?' im kidding. I would suggest you go talk to him as much as you can in the next few days, then invite him out to coffee or a bar, and chat to him about whether he has a girlfriend, how many babies he would like one day, marriage etc. These can give you signs on his sexuality.
 
I agree with killjoke but how do you cut your finger lifing? I would have thought crushing would be easier !! :lol:
 
Killjoke said:
Hmmm, my thoughts on the matter:

1. Straight guys who go to work out don't even notice other guys exist unless they are their friends and they came together.

2. If they do notice someone other than themselves, they don't continue looking. And they don't strike up conversations with strangers. And they certainly don't remark on how young a guy looks. Or continue to suck their fingers, no matter how much it hurts--it's a gym; pain is a badge of honor.

3. Have you seen your own pictures in your gallery??? Of course he was interested in you! :)

I think your instincts are right on. Go back, say "hey," see if he pursues conversation again. If he seems a little gun-shy, then you ask some questions. Or ask him to spot you on some equipment. Ask him about his physical regimen or tips on nutrition. Play it cool, but not aloof. I'm thinking if he was interested enough to talk to you today, he will again tomorrow.

Good luck...and for God's sake, update us tomorrow! ..|
Click to expand...

I'd say, Killjoke got it down to the science here... ..| ..| ..|

In addition to all of that, you may want to recalibrate your short-range sensors here.

You have been trying to pick up his 'gay vibe' and the pings coming back are certainly not loud enough for you to draw all of your conclusions.

I would not worry too much about it for the time being. He finds you both interesting and attractive. He is signalling 'I am interested in you' on all the frequencies. So, you want to pick it up from there and start building upon THAT vibe.

Do yourself a small favor and leave out that GAY vibe for a moment out.

He is signalling, 'I am interested in you.' (Not necessarily, I want to jump your bones this evening.) He also needs his time to build up his trust and some sort of friendship with you. He is only 21. He may be gay, str8, bi, or just curious. None of your direct concern at the moment.

Take him into your world, for who he really is, a stranger trying to make friends. What comes afterwards is written somewhere, too but it may not be for us to read from that book just yet.

Enjoy your new friendship. Show initiative and be good about it.


SC
PS. If your ride back comes again to interrupt a similar conversation:

#1
Tell him that all of his legal protection has been lifted and that he is now considered a free game for all.

#2
Thank him for his concern and let him know that you have just made alternative arrangements.
 
Hey, thanks for the extra advice to take a step back and keep it casual. I shouldn't be thinking about his sexuality. I should be focused on his interest in me and see where it goes. ..|
 
JB18 ...

Ever since I first saw this pic of you ...

180514.jpg


I've been completely enamored! :luv2:

So ... I can certainly understand why ANYONE would want to talk to You!!

Don't let HIS attractive qualities get in You way! Accept His interest in You at face value. It may not mean anything on a "Gay" level, at this point, but at least he finds You interesting enough to talk to! ..| And, "New Friends" are always a "Lucky" find! :D

For what it's worth ... if I happened to run across You, in person, I'd be so overwhelmed that I probably wouldn't have the nerve to even talk to You in the first place! #-o "Mormon Beauty" has more "balls" than I do!! ](*,) :cool:

So ... definitely keep up the "chat"! And, of course, let "Us" all know how it goes! YOU seem to be "One Lucky Guy"!! (group) :hurray: (!w!)

Keep smilin'!! :kiss: (*8*)
Chaz ;)
 
Asking for a contact info because "you might need tips" seems a bit...contrived. Why not simply express interest in him as a person? "Maybe we can hang out sometime." And yes, pursue it. :)

Lex
 
Just_Believe,

It's ironic how the scenario you're seeking advice on is so similar to ones that you have brilliantly responded to in the past. I think you know the answer to this one! ;) Keep chatting him up casually, now that you guys know each other. It sounds to me like sooner or later in the conversations he'll be bold enough to ask you out first, so go with the flow man!

Good for you! You deserve it (*8*)
 
Update: He wasn't there tonight at the gym :/ It's ok. I'll keep going regularly and I'll let you know when I see him again.
 
I too am interested in reading an update on this thread. And I agree with Chaz, you are hot!!! I dunno if I'd be to embarrased to talk to you, but I'd definitely be eye fuckin the hell out of you :-)

And if the Mormon Beauty didn't go for you, hell there are plenty more people out there that will like you. Not only are you very good looking, but you are pretty intelligent and good hearted (from what I've seen here on JUB).

Look at me blabbing around here like a little school girl...lol

OKay, I'll stop drooling now :-)

But we want updates!
 
You've got this, at the very worst, he is bisexual or something, hes just giving too many signs he's gay. "DO EETTT!!"
 
Aw, seeing this thread back up at the top makes me sad.

I have NOT SEEN this guy since that first night and it's driven me crazy. I've gone to the gym 2-4 times a week every week and I have not seen him at all. Otherwise, all of you would have been the first to know if something happened.

I'm sorry this one fizzled out :/

But if I do see him and if we hit it off again, I'll be sure to let you know. Thanks for your interest and advice in this matter.
 
Wow, I'm sorry to hear this. I wonder if he was there on a day-pass trying out the place?

You do know where he works--at that store you go to. Any chance of accidentally-on-purpose bumping into him there and inviting him out for a late dinner after work?

(*8*)
 
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