Nowhere to go but up

[belamy]

 

[LiquidSky]

Hang in there marley. I had to go on unemployment years ago when I got laid off. It helped me until I found the job that I've now had for 14 years.

 

[kevbo]

Technically unemployment is not other people's money. It's your previous employer's money.

 

[tooliso]

I was unemployed for 2months which is nothing compared to you but I bit the bullet and signed on to the dole (UK), well they call it Job Seekers Allowance here, but to be brutally honest, the majority of the toothless scrots in there really didnt have any intention of finding a job. The worst two months of my life! It was about the money but more so the boredom of having nothing to do, not getting out of bed until lunchtime and becoming nocturnal because there was fuck all to get up for.

Chin up though, you just have to bite the bullet and accept the fact you might need to do a shit job for a while. If that fails, you may find peace, as you say, at the end of a crackpipe...

 

[tooliso]

I know this girl, I went to school with her, anyway, she claims benefits (an example of how they throw money at tramps here in the UK for you) for mental damage or something on top of child support. Because her baby daddy set their council house on fire whilst her and the kid were in it (classy people) and she gets £14,000 per year for the fucking privelage!!!!!!
Needless to say this £14,000 a year goes on financing nutritionally balanced meals in various fast food places, fags, booze, getting beautiful new outfits (the type of material that, should you decide to go sans underwear, which she probably does, would certainly give you a yeast infection) to go out in, and, the cherry on the cake, an evenings worth of coke everytime she goes out.

 

[Alpha1851]

After 11 months of unsuccessful job-hunting I threw my pride out the window and filed for unemployment today. It feels like I've hit rock bottom. All the jokes I've made about welfare moms and people who mooch off other people's tax money are coming back to bite my nipples. It sucks cuz I'd rather work for my money but I've exhausted every possible resource.

There's no shame in govt aid. That's what it's there for—to help you when you need it. I especially wouldn't feel bad about collecting unemployment (which isn't govt aid) and I can't believe you waited 11 months. Pffttt, I would've filed right away. Sign up for food stamps if you need them.

Good luck w/ your job hunt. I'm keeping my fingers crossed!

On a side note, I read that more folks are signing up for the military b/c they can't find any other job right now. One veteran who was interviewed had served two tours in the Middle East. He recently got out of the Army (honorable discharge), but decided to re-enlist b/c he could not find another source of income. They were even getting food stamps and other govt. aid, but it wasn't enough.

 

[kevbo]

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFYZYXP2Ca8[/ame]

Oh yes, I went there...

 

[tooliso]

.



Sweet, you know where I can find some?

Give Whitney Houston a call

 

[Elwood]

I do not know how it works in the States but here in Canada we pay into employment insurance. A certain % gets deducted from every paycheck. I am a contractual worker and I always collect Employment insurance between contracts. Also at tax time if you make over a certain amount you may have to pay back some of that employment insurance. It is a good system that I do not feel guilty about using.

 

[tooliso]

Uh-uh, Miss Whitney makes too much money and has too much class to ever fool with crack. Okay, crack is wack.

She does cocaine, the pure, expensive shit. Not that shotty cheap ass baking soda.

Whitney is street, she does crack, she can go to Maaco and get her face painted up all she likes but her face tells no lies.

Have you considered being a guinea pig for medical testing?

 

[Rex]

What retailer did you work for?

I've been fired by quite a few. You could always prostitute yourself to old, fat men and women on craigslist. Just make sure to use protection.

Also, how did Belamy's post get to be first in the thread if it's not his thread?

 

[tooliso]

He was joking, Whitney said in her Diane Sawyer interview that she's "too classy for crack." We all know Whitney is hood as hell.

I should have known that, I mean, I think I did know that but I forgot about it then remembered it.

HUH?! Care to elaborate further what it is you mean by that?

You know, test drugs for pharmaceutical companies, like animals do. It would be like crack except getting paid to take it. Just make sure you dont take this http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/TGN1412, the press in the UK dubbed on of them the Elephant Man because his face swelled

 

[Ram]

Get your damn book published.

 

[Ram]

I rather read your shit than the shit on the shelves nowadays.

We are our worst critics. Just do it. And be prepared to be the black J.K. Rowling.

 

[tooliso]

Oh. I understand you now.

And since I do, I'm gonna quote my girl Whitney as an answer to that.

HELL TO THE N-O!

I wasnt being serious, fuck knows what drugs they would give you if you did.

Do online surveys in your spare time for vouchers and shit, they are boring but at least its a way of wasting time until you find something?

 

[tooliso]

Nooo, he's gonna clean his windows and surfaces, fertilize the garden, and top the car up with antifreeze so its all nice and clean for when we go over for tea and sandwiches. Who wants to bring the filling?

 

[looseliam]

Nothin wrong with it.

I went on unemployment when I left my last job.

Uncle Sugar paid for a summer of drunken bliss!

Good luck on the hunt - don't give up.