Odor trouble...down there

[openthedark]

Hi guys. I am trying to figure out how to handle this issue and would welcome useful advice.

My boyfriend is pretty clean and all, but he works late hours and sometimes we meet after work before he has a chance to shower. Sometimes he does shower, but he is horny for a while. What does that have to do with anything? Well, he is uncut, and he precums a lot. I don't have a lot of experience with uncut guys...ok, no experience actually, but with him at least, after a while, it smarts to...smell down there, sort of fishy? I don't know if he is aware that that happens, but if we fool around and he wants me to give him a blowjob, I don't like it at all and find myself turned off the rest of the time. The first time it happened I just went ahead because I didn't know what to do or say and it was awful. It has only happened a handful of times, but I forced myself to not say anything each time, except for the last. This last time, I went down on him, and then hesitated, and said I wasn't really feeling into it tonight, and ended everything.

I can't tell him to shower first because I will hurt his feelings and he is not a dirty guy, and like I said, sometimes it happens even if he does shower. And I don't want to tell him he smells down there. I am not very good with telling people things that will hurt their feelings or make them feel uncomfortable, but at the same time it is a total turn off and every time I go down on him I have a moment of "omg I hope it's ok this time." What would you do? Also, is this normal for uncut guys who precum a lot?

 

[KaraBulut]

I moved your post over to Health & Wellness.

There's two ways you can approach this.

You can tell him to take a shower. If you're old enough to be having sex, you're old enough to talk honestly about what you both want from sex. Don't make it a big deal- just say, "Hey, why don't you shower first- I love it when you smell like soap- it's hot" or "I'm going to jump in the shower- why don't you come make out with me in the shower". If that doesn't work- just tell him the truth and ask him to clean up.

The second way to handle this if a shower isn't an option is to have a frank talk with him about hygeine. A lot of uncut little boy's mothers and fathers don't tell them how to take care of their foreskin (especially in the US where many guys are cut). A little cleanup with a water and a washcloth (or some mouthwash) would probably make it a lot more pleassant for both of you.

One question I have is whether it's the smegma that is the issue or whether it's his cum/precum that has a taste/odor?

On your precum question - it doesn't make a difference whether he's cut or not. Some guys just have a lot of precum. There's a recent thread on this issue: http://www.justusboys.com/forum/showthread.php?t=268393

 

[openthedark]

Thanks Kara.

If I thought just showering would be the solution I would be more willing to tell him to do so, but this has happened even when he had just showered prior to meeting. That is why I questioned whether the smell is normal for uncut guys who precum a lot; I wasn't asking whether uncut guys have more precum, I know that there is no correlation there, I just figured that it is the precum getting trapped under there for a while that is causing this smell? I don't think it is smegma because I have not seen anything on his penis (though usually it is somewhat dark so I should look more closely), and I would think that that would be cleaned off when he showered...right? His precum does have a taste to it- also why I am assuming it is simply that which is causing the smell and not smegma.

 

[Nelson]

openthedark:

There is some truth to what Kara wrote - PART of the problem with any fishy smell down there - can be solved by a more thourough washing of the penis when the foreskin is retracted. Some Uncut guys or as I prefer to call - Natural guys have more creases and folds than others - making it necessary for them to spend a little extra time cleaning their penis.

The precum getting trapped under the foreskin might get a little smelly as you say - It can be dealt with by a wet warm wash cloth right before engaging in oral sex

The taste and smell of precum will vary and diet plays a role - here are some advice that makes precum/sperm taste better and perhaps also smell better:

http://ezinearticles.com/?Sperm-Taste---10-Simple-Tips-For-Better-Tasting-Semen&id=164106

One supplement that might help against this is to Use Chlorophyll geltabs or Chlorophyll liquid from Wild Oats/Whole Foods or health food store.

http://www.drumlib.com/supp/prod/chlorella_01.htm

This supplement along with probiotics as part of a daily diet may improve bodily odour problems. ... hope it helps you and him!

 

[KaraBulut]

Just out of curiosity- is he able to pull back his foreskin enough to clean well? I would expect that if he were having precum during a blowjob with a retracted foreskin, it shouldn't be a problem. However, if he can't pull back the foreskin enough to clean well.. then that's the problem.

 

[star-warrior]

If the foreskin is tight, it may take time to get it stretched by pulling back as far as it can go whilst hard and doing this every day until he can fully retract the foreskin whilst hard. What he shouldn't do is pull it back in one go and getting it stuck, that would cause a very painful problem. Look up phimosis on the net which is related to a tight foreskin.

If the foreskin is retractable during his flaccid state, that'd be be best time to get it washed.

 

[sixthson]

Run your finger under his foreskin and have him smell it.
He'll get the message...or get turned on by his own scent.

Sex is an intimate act that requires intimate conversation.
This truly is not as difficult as you are making it.

Practice these:

"Sweetheart, I love your ass, but before my tongue goes anywhere near it, we need to wash it".

"Baby, you know I love sucking your toes, but not after they have been in your socks and shoes all day. We need a shower first."

"Stud, you know I love how you look with a three day growth of beard, but your whiskers are murdering my balls. Let me shave you?"

Say it with love....and humor.

 

[aneal_lingus]

i dunno if this totally the same (i'm cut) but I know sometimes, expecially during the summer, my area would start to smell really bad. Like, I unbutton my pants and then I myself have to look twice to see whats going on. I never figured out if it was a health issue (think it was just a part of life, being musty sometimes). But I would also occasionally get a fish smell.

I did some research, and I found this magical product called "Crystal Deoderant". Sure many people have heard of it. Basically though, I put it on after I shower and I can go at least a full 24 hours without any scent on the applied area. I luv it. I actually check my genitals scent everytime I go to the restroom just to acknowledge the lack of smell, weird but lovely.

I don't put it on the tip of the penis, but the area around it. I tested a small spot to make sure I wasn't allergic. Its not very chemical though, just mineral and water. Look it up if your curious, I recommend it to the WORLD!

 

[Corny]

If I thought just showering would be the solution I would be more willing to tell him to do so, but this has happened even when he had just showered prior to meeting.

Then it means he just didn't clean properly ..

 

[sixthson]

Then it means he just didn't clean properly ..

Maybe we should make a dick washing video and have it as a sticky?

 

[bankside]

He would be embarrassed to know that things need a wash, but probably way more embarrassed if he realised he was putting you through a gross-out blow job.

Scenario 1:
Get this worried, serious look on your face, and tell him there is a stink issue that has been grossing you out so much that you had to ask internet strangers how to deal with it. Watch him shrivel up faster than his dick.

Scenario 2:
Send him to the showers with a big grin on your face and laugh it off. Don't analyse hurt feelings, it is like ripping off a bandaid. Quickly, with a smile, and without remorse. "Heh - seriously I'm not putting that in my mouth until you jump in the shower. Now go clean up so I can blow you, and don't keep me waiting."

 

[bankside]

Maybe we should make a dick washing video and have it as a sticky?

If it is washed properly it shouldn't be sticky.

 

[KaraBulut]

If it is washed properly it shouldn't be sticky.

There wasn't a "wink" after your post, so I'm not sure if you were kidding but if not, he's talking about the threads that are "stuck" on the top of the forum.. like this one.

Maybe we should make a dick washing video and have it as a sticky?

Excellent idea. I'll look around this evening and see if I can find something. It's not my area of expertise, so any suggestions for good videos/links would be appreciated.

 

[bankside]

If it is washed properly it shouldn't be sticky.

And apparently i have to say more because it isn't long enough. (the message, that is...)

 

[openthedark]

Just out of curiosity- is he able to pull back his foreskin enough to clean well?

His foreskin does go back but it's not what I would call loose. To get it back all the way he would have to move it himself, when he's erect it doesn't fully go back naturally.

Run your finger under his foreskin and have him smell it.
He'll get the message...or get turned on by his own scent.

Lol!

I did some research, and I found this magical product called "Crystal Deoderant

I'll take a look.

He would be embarrassed to know that things need a wash, but probably way more embarrassed if he realised he was putting you through a gross-out blow job.

That is definitely true, I know he would probably be more upset that I didn't tell him about it. It's just uncomfortable.

Using humor sounds like the easiest way. He always asks me to shower with him, so maybe I'll say something like "I like sucking you but after we were out all day I don't really like the smell...want to finally shower with me? *wink*"

Or maybe I could just link him to this thread, heh.

 

[spencer]

some uncut guys don't retract before urinating.

just think, moist urine skin, marinating all day long.

watch him piss and see if he does retract.

I would feel really guilty if I didn't take care of my shit before being with someone.

 

[Lukeee]

A little cleanup with a water and a washcloth (or some mouthwash) would probably make it a lot more pleassant for both of you.

Mouthwash?! Is that safe?

 

[KaraBulut]

Mouthwash?! Is that safe?

Sure. There was a discussion thread about this a while back.

Generally the rule is that anything that you can use in your mouth is safe to use on the outside of your body (with the exception of your eyes).

I wouldn't recommend that you soak in it but if you don't have access to soap and water, you can put a small amount of mouthwash on a tissue and clean up with that.

 

[CTorontoC]

I had this problem with my boyfriend a while back. Id been with uncut guys before but only ever in a hookup scenario and therefore I'd only been with an uncut guy when he was freshly showered. With my boyfriend, since sex could happen any time, I eventually came across the odor when I was going down on him. Although Im cut, I knew that if I didn't clean up properly after jerking off it could sometimes cause even my dick to have a bit of a smell so I let it pass.

I let it pass a few more times too, knowing that uncut guys often had this sort of problem but when my Jaw problem started to act up and giving head became a special event I didn't want it ruined by something stupid like a scent so I mentioned it to my bf really nicely and now before sex if there's any chance of oral he'll just use fragrant soap and water to clean the region and instead of fish I smell flowers. Takes all of 30 seconds and since he's technically playing with himself he can stay hard no prob. I didn't see such a big problem with asking, it's not like I was telling him he revolted me or anything to make him feel bad. He was really surprised at how often the problem had occurred and wanted to fix it.

Best of luck!

 

[bankside]

Using humor sounds like the easiest way. He always asks me to shower with him, so maybe I'll say something like "I like sucking you but after we were out all day I don't really like the smell...want to finally shower with me? *wink*"

Except that isn't humour, that sounds more like "softening the blow."

Humour has to be over the top. Lean down. Open your mouth. Close your mouth. Lean up and with a big grin on your face you say while looking into his eyes and laughing kindly, "Your dick smells like it was just shit out of a sick monkey."

He looks shocked and says "Seriously?" And you say "You have a choice - shower with me or on your own, but do it fast because I want to blow you." Then lick his nipple and give him a kiss.

This will only work if he has a sense of humour and a reasonable amount of self esteem, and you can't be shy about things... But you should only be dating guys with a sense of humour and a reasonable amount of self esteem. Well, that is what I think anyway, but it's your call if you can get away with that or not.

OH news flash!

He always asks you to shower with him? My first thought was why even discuss it then? Just get in the shower with him and soap him up. Are you saying no?

Then my second thought was: I can picture it now... he is on another site saying "I keep trying to get my BF into the shower with me because he needs a bit of a rinse before I go down there but he keeps saying no. How do I tell him it is not an option."

And then the guys on the other site are giving him bad advice, saying "Wow that's awkward. Hey I know, you should rub anchovies on your dick so he starts thinking maybe a shower together isn't such a bad idea."

That would be funny.