I am too forgiving a person can treat me like shit walk all over, I get pissed and basicly tell them off and the person apologizes. I accept their apology and not too long after that they go right back and do it again.
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Okay, so just how forgiving are you?
- Thread starter operafan
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I dont think i can be that tolerate. The closest i can be to that tolerate is if the straight guy genuinely apologised in front of my face, looking straight into my eyes, and ask me for forgiveness. Else i dont know, i would probably not speak to him ever again even if i work side by side with him.
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It takes seven years for anyone in my family to forgive someone who has crossed them. I am the same. It apparently has been like this for some centuries.
Do not make me send out the flying monkeys.
Do not make me send out the flying monkeys.
JOHN B
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I can hold a grudge FOREVER! I may be able to forgive, but I never forget...
Forgiving is a process that takes willingness and determination. Some things are so bad that you can't just forgive and go on. I'm very forgiving because I don't want to carry a lot of negative emotions with me. Forgiving does not excuse the person who wronged you, nor do you have to become their friend. Forgiveness lets go of the anger and you stop being a victim. I know it's not always easy. It took me several years to forgive a certain person.
C
Crew81
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Okay, dont mean to thread hijack (if i am) or want sympathy for my experience at the end
I would choose not to forgive
"Its not me you need to ask for forgiveness, its yourself"
People ask for forgiveness to stop their guilt and I think forgiveness can be given too easily.
I would hope for him to realise the wrongness of what he did and make drastic changes to become a better person
As stated in previous posts, It takes more to forgive ones self - that is a huge accomplishment that can only be achived through (hopefully) genuine guilt feeling for the act and wanting to become a better person.
The range of emotions that you would go thorough to get to self forgiveness would take you on an amazing rollercoaster ride of that is good and bad - a genuine self discovering and life changing journey. Looking at yourself and finding fault then wanting to change those faults is a very hard process. There is no easy way to do that. Just saying "I forgive you" is too easily done.
I choose not to forgive the following incident :
2 years ago, an ex jailbird nextdoor neighbour in a hick town where i once lived beat the shit out of me. Broke my cheekbone, knocked some teeth out (which i still dont have) and punched me in the face so hard my contact lenses fell out. Then he left me to go get an axe, (my Q to run like hell and get some help)
Not a day goes by that i dont wish ill on him, and the only thing i think of is that hes back in jail hopefully getting the shit kicked out of him (and more) but the best thing i hope for is that he'll genuinely realise how utterley animalistic the incident was and try self forgiveness. I dont hold high hopes for that because he had a habit of physical violence on people without showing any remorse. For this reason, i will not forgive.
I spent the past year and a half going from forgiveness to rage to wanting revenge then back to forgiveness - a dreaded cycle. It becomes obsessive and then when youve settled on forgiveness something will happen that makes you go through the forgive-revenge cycle again.
Is it possible to truly forgive?, or is it just an emotion that changes?
I choose to forgive him for my own reasons : for being a hick gaybashing bogan ("trailer trash" for you usa people) and I genuinely hope that he will learn and make peace with himself and stop hurting others. That gets me through it when the incident unnerves me
But in no way do i forgive his actions. I would not even want to see him if he wanted closure.
As its said "to forgive is to forget" and damn me! : I have a mind like a steel trap! I can never forget
Drats!
I would choose not to forgive
"Its not me you need to ask for forgiveness, its yourself"
People ask for forgiveness to stop their guilt and I think forgiveness can be given too easily.
I would hope for him to realise the wrongness of what he did and make drastic changes to become a better person
As stated in previous posts, It takes more to forgive ones self - that is a huge accomplishment that can only be achived through (hopefully) genuine guilt feeling for the act and wanting to become a better person.
The range of emotions that you would go thorough to get to self forgiveness would take you on an amazing rollercoaster ride of that is good and bad - a genuine self discovering and life changing journey. Looking at yourself and finding fault then wanting to change those faults is a very hard process. There is no easy way to do that. Just saying "I forgive you" is too easily done.
I choose not to forgive the following incident :
2 years ago, an ex jailbird nextdoor neighbour in a hick town where i once lived beat the shit out of me. Broke my cheekbone, knocked some teeth out (which i still dont have) and punched me in the face so hard my contact lenses fell out. Then he left me to go get an axe, (my Q to run like hell and get some help)
Not a day goes by that i dont wish ill on him, and the only thing i think of is that hes back in jail hopefully getting the shit kicked out of him (and more) but the best thing i hope for is that he'll genuinely realise how utterley animalistic the incident was and try self forgiveness. I dont hold high hopes for that because he had a habit of physical violence on people without showing any remorse. For this reason, i will not forgive.
I spent the past year and a half going from forgiveness to rage to wanting revenge then back to forgiveness - a dreaded cycle. It becomes obsessive and then when youve settled on forgiveness something will happen that makes you go through the forgive-revenge cycle again.
Is it possible to truly forgive?, or is it just an emotion that changes?
I choose to forgive him for my own reasons : for being a hick gaybashing bogan ("trailer trash" for you usa people) and I genuinely hope that he will learn and make peace with himself and stop hurting others. That gets me through it when the incident unnerves me
But in no way do i forgive his actions. I would not even want to see him if he wanted closure.
As its said "to forgive is to forget" and damn me! : I have a mind like a steel trap! I can never forget
Drats!