The Original Gay Porn Community - Free Gay Movies and Photos, Gay Porn Site Reviews and Adult Gay Forums

  • Welcome To Just Us Boys - The World's Largest Gay Message Board Community

    In order to comply with recent US Supreme Court rulings regarding adult content, we will be making changes in the future to require that you log into your account to view adult content on the site.
    If you do not have an account, please register.
    REGISTER HERE - 100% FREE / We Will Never Sell Your Info

    PLEASE READ: To register, turn off your VPN (iPhone users- disable iCloud); you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.

  • The Support & Advice forum is a no-flame zone.
    The members offering support and advice do so with the best intention. If you ask for advice, we don't require you to take the advice, but we do ask that you listen and give it consideration.

Old music teacher..... help!

Keeland said:
Any chance he could have hummed a few bars with the older man, so that's he knew you are gay?
Click to expand...

Nah, I don't think so. They live in totally different areas and to my knowledge definitely don't know each other... but that would be quite an interesting turn of events, that's for sure.
 
Soilwork said:
.. he was your freaking piano teacher.
Click to expand...

Haha, ok, when you put it like THAT it really doesn't seem like such a huge deal I guess.

UPDATE: I actually have plans with him tonight.... so it should be interesting to see what happens, considering I still haven't made my mind up about what to do. I guess it'll depend on how we both feel and ...... how much alcohol I've consumed....... yea...........

But I'll let you guys know what happens.

Thanks for all the advice, as always.
 
Hey, this is just like Julia Roberts sister in mystic pizza! Only with a piano and no pizza and you're both gay and he's 20 years older rather than 10 and you are already in college. But other than that it's the same thing! I say do it if you want. This guy could be your age and( i hate to say it)it would probably still not work out. 20 year olds are not known to settle down. Rock this guys world and help him "out". He needs a little starter fuck before he moves on to the big leagues.Than he'll meet someone who he will fall in love with who is his age and you will go back to school and fuck hot frat guys till graduation. Why does everyone have to be so heavy hearted? Have fun!!! This is the best time of your life! :gogirl: Don't think so much.
 
Hmmmm if your cool with it, go for it. Like everyone has pointed out, this prolly won't be anything but a rebound or sex relationship. Don't expect a hubby out of this.

I dont think I'd be cool with the situation, like Celine Dion's husband that knew her as a teen........always kinda creepy. But like i said, go for it if it works for ya.
 
bluedragon4 said:
He needs a little starter fuck before he moves on to the big leagues.Than he'll meet someone who he will fall in love with who is his age and you will go back to school and fuck hot frat guys till graduation. Why does everyone have to be so heavy hearted? Have fun!!! This is the best time of your life! :gogirl: Don't think so much.
Click to expand...

perfect advice.
 
^
Yes and no.

Good advice in many ways, but he really should start to think about what he wants in a relationship.

It's never a bad thing to question our lives. It is, in fact, usally very helpful.

So listen to the advice people gave you and think carefully.

I still think there could be a HUGE gossip fallout.

But I hope that it is simply another postive experience.

:)
 
Great fantasy material.
 
bluedragon4 said:
This is the best time of your life! :gogirl: Don't think so much.
Click to expand...
If he doesn't think a little bit about what he's doing and why, where he wants to go and how to get there, this WILL be the best time of his life. But this time of his life is very short.

It's sad when someone reaches the long years of mid-life and the best time of their life is past. It doesn't have to be that way. You can have a lot of fun in your 20s and 30s while learning to make smart choices.
 
OK guys, help me out here. I'm writing this literally minutes after getting home from his house (where I spent the night last night....). So basically we talked forever and he told me he wasn't really looking for a relationship, which was fine. I was actually relieved to hear him say that b/c that kind of takes the pressure off. Of course if he wasn't looking for a relationship then what did he want from me?

Oh yea, sex.

But this is where it gets bizzare. We didn't even do anything b/c he was so nervous!! We basically made out for like an hour on his couch and it was horrible! I don't know if he's just a bad kisser or if he really was truly nervous, but it was NOT good. He was really awkward and kind of trembling... I didn't know what to make of it. But he was the one who initiated everything; it's not like I was pressuring him to do anything (if anything, it was the other way around). So eventually we wind up in bed together (don't ask me how). But ugh.... we're on our sides facing each other, making out, and he's clenching my waist like he's holding on for dear life... I kept wanting to scream "RELAX!" and I did keep asking him if he was okay and he would say yes and we'd continue doing what I guess humans would call "kissing" even though I was miserable the whole time. I eventually said I was tired and we just went to sleep...

I just don't understand it. I'm very attracted to this guy, but I think his nervousness really did turn me off in ways I can't even explain. (Am I being an asshole?) It was honestly just weird having a guy twice as older than me not know what the hell he was doing..... And plus, why was he even nervous??? He was married for all these years; his wife saw him naked all the time... I don't get it.

And I know it can be scary being with a guy the first time and all that, but I was just shocked at how nervous he actually was. You guys seriously don't understand!!! It was insane.... We're talking shaking, trembling, the works.

(By the way, I don't mean any disrespect towards him. He's a dear friend and I love him to death. I'm being brutally honest right now b/c I need to vent and obviously this forum is the only place I'm going to do that. I would never talk about him in a negative way to anyone in my social circle or anything like that. I don't even have any negative feelings towards him anyway, I just wanted to tell you guys what happened).

But I felt sorta bad b/c this morning he was being VERY affectionate and sweet... He wants to hang out again tonight but I made up some lame excuse and said maybe another time this week.... (he lives like 30 minutes away from my university).

So yea... not feeling so great right now.
 
if he's not ready, he's not ready.

If I were you, I'd move on and forget about anything but friendship until he's ready for more.

If you even reall want to at all.
 
He must be freaking out! I can't imagine coming out as gay at that age. You missed all the good stuff! That would turn me off also though. I love a cock sure man and not into someone being all unsure.
 
The guy has been living a straight life all his life. You can't expect him to break down those walls entirely (even if he tries his very best). He's nervous. He's unsure of himself! He wants it but he doesn't know how to do it.

It was nice you were very patient with him. He'll get better but he is learning his first times from you.

I still think it's kinky though that he has known you since you were 8.. lol I don't know, it's just me.
 
"No, no, Adam. Wrong key. Let me see your fingers... You hit the note, here."
haha :lol:

And then years later, those fingers are somewhere else ;)
 
maybe if you want to help him, you will show him some gay dating sites on the web or such or even some group that he might join - there has to be one, but heck if I know what it is.

but there are many guys with mistakes out there, some have divorced them, some still have them. help him find the first group and build a life for himself.

I am glad that you are such a compassionate person. I may not understand your logic.
 
I can understand his nervousness. I have been there, I came out at 38 after being married and having kids. Not only that you were a student of his which is probably on his mind as well. For the record I do not think there is any problem with that. You have no idea whats going on in his mind, let me tell you there is a tornado rolling around in there. You should have told him to relax, it would have helped the situation.

If you want give him another chance, but speak to him first it will help. Do not forget this is all new to him and he probably has no one to talk too about all these thoughts going on in his head. I remeber when I first came out I thought I was the only married dad who came out and seeing as I came out late I had no gay friends and no one I could speak to about my feelings. It was rough at first. Tell him about JUB, Jub helped me tremendously with the whole coming out process.
 
Adam, please be careful with people's feelings.

There's a similarity between this relationship and the one you recently were in with another older man.

I can tell from way over here so I hope you're aware as well that this man is going to very easily become emotionally attached to you. If he hasn't already. He's vulnerable. It doesn't matter how old he is, the transition he's navigating through is very rough -- in fact in some ways it's even rougher at his age than at yours.

I'm not saying you have any malicious intent but you are feeding food to a man who has starved himself and it's clear you're not comfortable with that position. Unless these two relationships are a departure for you, you seem to invite sexual/emotional situations that, once consumated, you then resist and get frustrated by. You seem to expect something of older men that comes from your fantasy rather than the reality of the men involved. You know, age doesn't magically erase insecurity or fear or need. Despite all the growing and learning and evolving I hope you'll do in the next 20 years, when you're 40 you're going to feel like essentially the same man you are today. As Paul Simon put it, "After changes upon changes we are more or less the same."

There is some reason you're attracting these men and some reason you're seducing them into pursuing you. From what you've described I don't believe for a minute that that music teacher had the nerve to pursue you without your encouraging it. Your subconscious is looking for something and trying to draw it to you. Try to figure out what it is and this pattern of frustration will resolve itself.
 
Adam2299,

Sex with anybody not your wife, let alone the same partner or that of a new sex partner of the same gender, sounds new and scary for the man. It's like stepping out of one's elements. The "unfamiliar." Your reaction to him may be exaggerated -- or that you just don't fathom where he's coming from. Perhaps you are not the one to help this man along.
 
sorry, not to make you feel any more weirded out but i was cringing and kinda felt creeped out while reading
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top