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One night stand... awful...

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goodlyric

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I felt so bad after one night stand with guys. I don't know why, just feel guilty.

How about you guys?

:confused:
 
I don't... as long as both guys have the same expectations going in. Hook-ups can be a lot of fun.
If you're looking for a boyfriend or true love though, I can see why a one-night stand might leave you with a hollow feeling.
 
^ Yeah, what Drops of Jupiter said. It's all about expectations.

I'm realigning my expectations to deal with my short term reality. Long term, of course, I want an LTR. But for now, I'm learning to deal with "short term solutions"! ;)
 
Drops of Jupiter said:
I don't... as long as both guys have the same expectations going in. Hook-ups can be a lot of fun.
If you're looking for a boyfriend or true love though, I can see why a one-night stand might leave you with a hollow feeling.
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I have the experience that after I have sex with a guy, I found I was kinda like him much more than before. I don't know what's his opinion. We could not see each other much because he moved back to his country.

So bad.
 
I used to like the idea of random casual hook-ups. But, I haven't had any of such in a long time and I seem to have lost my desire for that. I guess what I'm really after is love, so yes, it's all about expectations! :)
 
confusedboy23 said:
I used to like the idea of random casual hook-ups. But, I haven't had any of such in a long time and I seem to have lost my desire for that. I guess what I'm really after is love, so yes, it's all about expectations! :)
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I only look for one night stand when I feel desperate about loneliness... I think what I am really expecting for is love, but I am always doing the wrong way.

:(
 
EuroboyNYC said:
I just had one the night before last.

It was wonderful, he actually stayed the whole night and we showered together and he dropped me at work in the morning. We had a nice evening and I liked him (obviously enough to let him shag me) but now he keeps texting and he keeps wanting to see me. I don't feel guilty about the sex, but I feel a bit badly for leading him on because I think I knew that he expected it to be more than a one off.
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Sorry, Dude. That's nasty.
 
Like Drops said, as long as you both have the same expectations going in.
I am looking for long term but a boy has to check his oil every once and a while??:badgrin:
 
goodlyric said:
I only look for one night stand when I feel desperate about loneliness... I think what I am really expecting for is love, but I am always doing the wrong way.

:(
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Yeah, you're going about it wrong. One night stands are not about love. You're just preparing yourself to be heartbroken. :cry:

Don't do one night stands if you're looking for love.
 
Lube said:
Yeah, you're going about it wrong. One night stands are not about love. You're just preparing yourself to be heartbroken. :cry:

Don't do one night stands if you're looking for love.
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I just find myself weird that after having sex with him, I may change my expectation. That sucks I know but wonderful sex really makes me like him more. I am not the kind of person who may love someone immediately, but after great sex, sometimes it works!
 
What is "great sex" to you? Hot & heavy & kinky?

Or long, slow, & sensual?

If it's the sensual type, you're building a relationship as you have sex, so it's not surprising you like the guy afterwards.
 
Lube said:
What is "great sex" to you? Hot & heavy & kinky?

Or long, slow, & sensual?

If it's the sensual type, you're building a relationship as you have sex, so it's not surprising you like the guy afterwards.
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My recent one is with a hot guy. We secretly liked each other for a while but neither of us took action at the beginning because both of us are kinda in the closet. Not long before he had to leave this country we had a talk and both of us realized we really had wasted the time before. We had sex and I have to say I really like doing that with him.

I know before having sex I've liked him to some extent. But after that, I just like him more.
 
goodlyric said:
My recent one is with a hot guy. We secretly liked each other for a while but neither of us took action at the beginning because both of us are kinda in the closet. Not long before he had to leave this country we had a talk and both of us realized we really had wasted the time before. We had sex and I have to say I really like doing that with him.

I know before having sex I've liked him to some extent. But after that, I just like him more.
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Well that's totally understandable. (*8*)

It's not a 'classic' one night stand, in that you guys did know each other before, so there was some emotional connection there. You just built on that connection during sex.

Sorry that he had to leave. :(
 
Never had one actually. At least, I wouldn't call them one night stands. I wouldn't have sex with a guy just because I need to shoot my load...
 
Lube said:
Well that's totally understandable. (*8*)

It's not a 'classic' one night stand, in that you guys did know each other before, so there was some emotional connection there. You just built on that connection during sex.

Sorry that he had to leave. :(
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Thanks. Actually we never talked to each other even we could always see each other that time. I just too liked him so I dare not speak out this kind of stuff to him. It seems he also thought about me this way.

But I agree with you that it is not so classic one night stand. I like having sex with those at least I've known a little bit, though.
 
goodlyric said:
Thanks. Actually we never talked to each other even we could always see each other that time. I just too liked him so I dare not speak out this kind of stuff to him. It seems he also thought about me this way.

But I agree with you that it is not so classic one night stand. I like having sex with those at least I've known a little bit, though.
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Yes, trust helps a lot!
 
I don't do the whole "guilt after pleasure" thing. If I wanted to do it at the time, then why feel guilty?
 
EuroboyNYC said:
Yeah, I know. I feel really badly now. Don't get me wrong, I could get to like him and I am now planning to see him again (tonight actually for a drink) but I the thing that bothers me is that I did it anyway the other night without first having the understanding of what it would be. I am going to talk to him tonight about it and make sure that we are on the same page before anything else happens.
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Wish you good luck dude. I hope I could also do it like you.
 
guilt is for the weak.

just know that it's always best to regret the things you HAVE done than to regret the things you HAVEN'T.
 
Adding to everything else...
It's natural for a part of you to say 'What am I doing'?
On other words, your mind and body, as in other stages of growth mainly associated with adolescence, are adjusting to each other.
It's all just a matter of time. Don't sweat it too much.
 
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