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Open Relationship Question

H

huggies1f

Joined
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Hey all,

So my and boyfriend are in our early twenties and have been together 3 years. We have been in a open relationship for almost 8 months now in which we play occasionally apart. Problem is my bf has already hookup with 5 guys over the span of the 8 months and yet I cant actually bring myself to go through with it. I want to explore sexually because I am young but I just find hooking up so hard and unnerving despite how many apps and sites there are.

My question is how can I get over this nervousness inorder to explore my sexuality?
 
Maybe your nervousness is there for a reason.

Do you really want an open relationship...or do you feel like it is something you talked yourself into? Are you doing it because he wanted to or because you wanted to...or did you both decide together?

What kind of exploration of your sexuality do you think you want to experience? Is it important to explore with a variety of people or would it be exciting for you to explore with one person?

The reason I ask these questions is because I think being true to yourself is the best possible route to travel and it doesn't sound to me as though you are entirely sure what that means as you have said you can't
"bring yourself to" that place...there must be a reason for that. Figure out what the reason is before you proceed. .
 
The term "open relation" is a contradiction in term. Either you are in a relationship or not.

If you are having sex with other people then what are you saving just especially for your partner?

I have seen this many times, it is just a matter of time before people in open relationships find someone they like better and it ultimately ends their relationship.
 
If you both really into each other,
i don't think both want an open relationship.

Maybe there is something missing like his or your cock is not much fun ?
 
No I want a open relationship, but sometimes its get difficult. 80% of the time I am content with it.

To be honest, I love porn and jacking off way more than hooking up.
 
Dashriprock3172 said:
The term "open relation" is a contradiction in term. Either you are in a relationship or not.

If you are having sex with other people then what are you saving just especially for your partner?

I have seen this many times, it is just a matter of time before people in open relationships find someone they like better and it ultimately ends their relationship.
Click to expand...

There isn't one perfect type of relationship. While open relationships are harder to sustain and more risky, they're no less valid if that's what both people want.

And what you're saving just for your partner are your feelings for him.
 
Well, in my last relationship, I was sort of the same way. I did not really care that my boyfriend had a few casual partners on the side, and I actually liked most of them. Yes, I knew them personally. They were respectful, intelligent guys. The thing is, although I never felt threatened by them, I never felt like I could do anything like that. It's not that I was averse to doing it, but I just couldn't get into the idea if I wanted to.

I think that some people might actually just be wired that way, and it's something you have to accept about yourself like you accept being gay. Or maybe someone here could give you advice on how to overcome it. I don't know. If you really do want to explore your sexuality more, though, and it's with your boyfriend's blessing, good luck to you.

Maybe you would feel more comfortable with another guy, though, if your boyfriend happened to be present at the time. It might sound weird, but it's all I know to say other than "good luck."
 
I wanna point out that being in an open relationship doesn't mean you HAVE to have Alex outside, just that you could. What's important isn't that you're fucking around, it's that you're not bothered when your partner is.

And of course, the moment this changes, the relationship needs to be redefined. There's nothing wrong with people's feelings about something like this changing overtime.
 
Maybe at this stage in your life you'd have an easier time exploring if you weren't in a relationship. There's a strong divide on the entire topic of open relationships, proponents seem to think it makes sense an argue that there's a huge difference between sex and living making, while opponents argue that relationship, by defintion means monogamy. I've come to believe from my experience on JUB that we must all be wired differently. The key is to find out what is right for you.
 
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