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OptimisticallyPessimistic - Archived Blog Posts

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OptimisticallyPessimistic

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Dec 6, 2006
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Finally took a chance on meeting some guy through craigslist. Yeah, I know not the worlds brightest thing to do, but got to meet guys somehow. The guy's add asked for a response with stats and pics, I replied with all the stats he asked for, and a few pics similiar to his; cock pics. He responds got any face pics? I figure I'm taking a chance to actually meet some one here, tired of just sitting around waiting for some guy to take notice. I sent him a few face pictures. Four fucking hours later no response. No e-mail, no instant message, nothing! Like WTF!!! I kow I'm not super model quality but I'm cute. I've heard from people that some people on there get you to send them your pictures and then never make any good on their ads. Guess I was just added to the list of con-ed people. Why are people so munipulative? I just can't win. Never going to meet a guy at my rate. It's no wonder all my friends are girls.
 
Had a chance to come out to my best friend tonight. Totally blew it. Danced around it until she forced out an answer and it wasn't the right one. She kept throwing guesses and I kept saying no, no, no, finally started saying maybe, and I thought she was going to guess gay next so I got so siked myself up to say yes, had it ready on the tip of my tongue, and she threw bi out there. Before I could stop myself yes slipped right out. It's half true isn't it? I mean I have no attraction to women what so ever. So it's sorta true. I'm just an all around fuck up, oh well. I keep running it through my head, and I've thought of a few ways I could have made that go better. Still thinking of a few others. But it's not as easy to say it when it comes time, even if you can imagine actually saying it. God forbid I should try and tell my parents; I'll probably whimp out and say something about a girlfriend.
 
Finally and truthfully came out to my bestfriend. I waited until we had a chance to talk about it in person and I just let it all out. It went so much better than I could have even imagined. She gave me a hug and said that's okay. Then she asked a lot of questions. I've never been one to freeze up when asked a sex question but for everyone of hers i need promting to answer it. So awkward...but I'm glad I got that off my chest. Now I can worry about telling my parents.
 
Finally told my parents tonight that I'm gay. I had myself prepared for the worst. Instead I find out not only did they suspect, but they thought I would be since I was 3. To top it off my dad had been going to F.L.A.G. meetings to help prepare for tonight's conversation. Now I feel like a total dumb ass for waiting so long to tell them. Instead of getting the surprised reactions I thought there would be I end up being the surprised one. I guess your parents are the ones who know you best, sometimes even know you better than yourself. But I am just so glad that they took it so well and that they excepted me.
 
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