On Topic Discussion Pec fetish: offensive?

[Level27]

Hey, all,

So, to preface my post, I'm an introverted, kindhearted gay man who respects people's boundaries; they say no to certain things, I oblige. In general, people enjoy my company and find me "down-to-Earth", approachable and relatable. I've been also described as tolerant and un-gossiping.

With that being said,

Pecs is my primary sexual fetish. I love playing with them. I love grabbing and quaking them. I love stimulating the nipples beyond control. I seek to make hot guys horny by complimenting the shit out of their beautiful pecs, making them feel lost over big round breastmeats. I love pecs.

I've noticed, though, that in at least a handful of situations where I come into physically-intimate contact with a hot guy with nice big pecs (could have been a Go-go boi, a hookup, a boyfriend, or even a random fellow friendly member at gay pride), he actually gets offended when I play with or merely touch his round meaty breast-steaks; they weren't otherwise offended by my physically-intimate contact.

Also, when I'm on Chaturbate and I request with a tip for the male model to play with their large grabbable pecs, most don't have an issue with it, but then again, there are at least those few who do firmly shake their heads and say "I don't do that shit." (Like they're irritated that I even requested that of them.)

So, it's mostly not a problem. But, still, those occasional receivers of my pec-fetish do get turned off and/or peeved by it.

If you would be one of those such guys do would get anoyed, what would your reason be for it? No attacks, no judgement from me. I'm casually curious.

(The reason I described my character at the beginning of my post is, some might wonder if perhaps my behaviour/personality was off-putting and played a roll in said-offended guys getting offended. Never in any of these cases have I acted in a socially-annoying manner; for them to be turned off specifically by my involvement of their pecs.)

 

[Peloso]

Maybe those off-put guys mistook it for some kind of man-boob or female breast fetish.

 

[rareboy]

If they are pitching their bods for tips, fuck 'em.

They have zero right to be peeved by anything that anyone requests unless they say....'no feet...no tits...etc. etc.'

Otherwise they are just whores and selling their time.

Let your freak flag fly baby and keep asking them to flex those man tits as much as you want.

 

[Zeno Lorea]

Well, I personally don't get horny if people touch my nipples. To the contrary, it makes me less horny. So when I play with strangers and they touch my nipples I tell them ever so gently that I don't like that, and usually tell them what I prefer instead. To be frank, I like anything else, so if they were happily doing this or that, I tell them I prefer this or that. I don't get angry or upset about it because I understand that most people love it. Of course it's annoying for me, but it's nobody's fault, and everybody is probably annoyed by something.

So, the reason I don't like is because that's just how my body works. Softly caress my shoulders and back with your two hand symmetrically and within a minute we can fuck. Touch my nipples and I'll be less interested. Nothing personal, ever.

 

[Peloso]

Jab your finger in my belly button and I will double over and knock you off the bed.

Kiss my neck and all is forgiven.

 

[cabinfever]

So, it's mostly not a problem. But, still, those occasional receivers of my pec-fetish do get turned off and/or peeved by it.

If you would be one of those such guys do would get anoyed, what would your reason be for it? No attacks, no judgement from me. I'm casually curious.

(The reason I described my character at the beginning of my post is, some might wonder if perhaps my behaviour/personality was off-putting and played a roll in said-offended guys getting offended. Never in any of these cases have I acted in a socially-annoying manner; for them to be turned off specifically by my involvement of their pecs.)

Only because you asked - yeah - I am one of the guys you describe who does NOT like it.

I don't like anyone I don't know aggressively touching me in any way. My chest and pecs were hairy and well defined when I was single in my 20s and alot of guys thought it was cool or maybe thought I would be turned on if they put their hands inside my shirt and/or rubbed my chest and even pull my chest hair out (like who the fuck wants that?)- it is NOT cool.

I stopped taking my shirt off when I was dancing at some clubs and got soaking wet instead with my shirt clinging to me but it cut down the grabbing at least. Maybe one of the worst experiences of my club days was going into The Eagle in SF on a Sunday afternoon when you couldn't even move a step because a friend I was with that day wanted to go there. I had a shirt on but it got ripped and it was so busy I couldn't even move - getting five steps in any direction was like playing TWISTER - and the nipples/chest thing I couldn't avoid - worst club experience ever and I never went back.

I am older now and my husband can and does grab me anywhere he wants to and I like it - because I love him and he turns me on so the feeling is mutual (that is the key - for me anyway - MUTUAL.

I hope I didn't offend you - I would normally just scroll on by but you seemed sincere when you asked so - there you go. That is my reason - maybe other people have different reasons.

 

[rareboy]

My partner of 40 years made it very clear the first time we fucked that he didn't like nipple play so that was the only time I needed guidance.

On the other hand, I am up for it if is gentle.

Not into nipple torture at all and have had to tell a couple of guys in my younger years....nicely but firmly.

 

[ShadowCat]

Jab your finger in my belly button and I will double over and knock you off the bed.

Kiss my neck and all is forgiven.

What if I lick your belly button??

 

[Peloso]

My partner of 40 years made it very clear the first time we fucked that he didn't like nipple play so that was the only time I needed guidance.

On the other hand, I am up for it if is gentle.

Yeah, gentle. I seem to gravitate toward guys whose idea of nipple play is to squeeze them tightly like they're holding a balloon shut.

What if I lick your belly button??

Sure but brush your teeth first. I don't want any pepperoni chunks in my jizz cup.

 

[Alistair]

My partner of 40 years made it very clear the first time we fucked that he didn't like nipple play so that was the only time I needed guidance.

On the other hand, I am up for it if is gentle.

Not into nipple torture at all and have had to tell a couple of guys in my younger years....nicely but firmly.

I spent a weekend with a hookup, we were walking around the next day and he complained about his nipples hurting. My answer was “I wonder why” I can get a little carried away on nipples and necks.

 

[Level27]

So, I noticed that most participants who responded to this thread shifted the topic from pecs into specifically nipples. And, one participant was particularly focused on the interpersonal rules and regulations revolving around him and his partners grabbing each other anywhere.

(Two members, Peloso and Rareboy, actually addressed the inquiry at hand and stayed on topic. Thank you both. haha)

In fact, I take that change of specific topic as an answer.

It seems that, sub-consciously for a lot of English-speaking gay guys, pecs is less interesting; it doesn't prominently exist as a part of the sexual experience. I'm guessing that some of our English-speaking Western cultures in general haven't much caught on to having eroticized that particular part of the male body; as much as it has done so for nipples. Hell, in a sexual setting, we still call them by "pecs" and "chest", their generic terms; not (muscular male) tits. Not thick "breasts"; not "steak breasts", like what I said. (I'm going to bet some people took my conscious effort to turn pecs erotic in that method as a joke; probably even thought I was trying to be a troll. I wasn't.)

If you look at a lot of Japanese porn with muscular gay men, a common occurrence amoung those hot models is their grabbing, massaging and "tenderizing" each other's muscular breastmeats. They don't even consider it a separate fetish. They don't mention it. They don't have a name for what their doing. It's just an integrated part of their sexual act. In western gay porn (with mostly Caucasian and Latino models), the hot models tend to lick each other's nipples. Any pec-grabbing seems more of a separate uncommonly fetish there; much akin to cockrings, piercings, smoking, and other vices.

I would say, after much thought, I think Peloso does actually have a point: some might treat grabbing the pecs as akin to "treating him like a woman"; or like he's fat. I have a few examples where the receiver of my pec fetish didn't get offended per say, but they started treating the request as if I was meaning to treat them like women.
In the first instance, there have been a couple of cam models who, after I tipped and requested them to "grab and caress the muscular male 'tits' ", didn't say no. On the other hand, on camera, they would squish their pecs together to create a burrowed cleavage, and they'd then dance and step like a woman stripper. I would immediately laugh and tell them, No!! Not like that!" Embarrassed that I made him do that, I would then leave his camroom. In yet another another instance, I had grabbed a beautiful man's pecs, and soon after during our hookup, he told me tenderly, "for you, I'll pretend like I'm a woman." ... ... ... ... I looked at him and responded, "... I'm gay. I'm into men."

Over all, at best, it appears pecs to these guys is sexually less interesting or uninteresting altogether. At worst, it's offensive. In both situations, it probably has ties to gender politics.


Added - Also, Rareboy, thanks kindly for the encouragement. haha I try not to tip them too heavily until they actually perform my fetish. I suppose the first small tip is a "down payment" of sorts.

 

[Level27]

I don't like anyone I don't know aggressively touching me in any way. My chest and pecs were hairy and well defined when I was single in my 20s and alot of guys thought it was cool or maybe thought I would be turned on if they put their hands inside my shirt and/or rubbed my chest and even pull my chest hair out (like who the fuck wants that?)- it is NOT cool.

I stopped taking my shirt off when I was dancing at some clubs and got soaking wet instead with my shirt clinging to me but it cut down the grabbing at least. Maybe one of the worst experiences of my club days was going into The Eagle in SF on a Sunday afternoon when you couldn't even move a step because a friend I was with that day wanted to go there. I had a shirt on but it got ripped and it was so busy I couldn't even move - getting five steps in any direction was like playing TWISTER - and the nipples/chest thing I couldn't avoid - worst club experience ever and I never went back.

Needless to say, a good rule of thumb to always bare in mind is that any sexual contact should be mutual and consenting. That's a reminder to anyone and everyone.

What this thread is focused on is not the topic of breaking trust and boundaries with unwanted touching but about (consenting) encounters where specifically touching a guy's pecs is a turn-off; as opposed to all other sexual acts.

I hope I didn't offend you - I would normally just scroll on by but you seemed sincere when you asked so.

Why wouldn't someone inquiring this be sincere? I suppose I'm not completely understanding what you mean.