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Playing it by ear

bwbw86

bwbw86

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So last week this guy messaged me on myspace and he seemed really cool so we started talking. we were texting back and forth some and the next day I had a really SHITTY day at work so I was telling him about it and he ended up driving an hour and a half. When he got there I was pretty psyched cos he looked even better than his pictures. We drove around and smoked for awhile and just talked which was great. I love simple stuff like that. Then he came back and we watched Texas Chainsaw Massacre the beggining (great date movie I know ha) and I could tell he was like gettin closer to me on the couch and he looked so effin cute in his basketball shorts and hoodie. So we ended up cuddlin on the couch for a while. Then he stayed with me and we just like cuddled and made out. Pretty awesome.

Honestly typing this out makes it seem pretty fuckin ridiculous. I meet a dude and in one night he's stayin with me. Blah.

Eitherway we hung out once more last week and then we were planning on hanging out again yesterday. Having an actual date. But he ended up not being able to make it. Something about getting lost?? ha

What I'm wondering is, did I fuck it up by moving way too fucking fast? I like him a lot. And he just doesn't seem to want to talk to me that much lately.

I think I'm just gonna chillout and not make any effort to get ahold of him. Let him do the work.

Do you think it's a good idea? ](*,)
 
bwbw86 said:
Honestly typing this out makes it seem pretty fuckin ridiculous. I meet a dude and in one night he's stayin with me. Blah.
Click to expand...

Everything happened a bit fast. But no one twisted anyone's arm here- you're two adults who chose to do this.

And you weren't the first to mess around on a first date. You won't be the last either. It happens all the time.

bwbw86 said:
Eitherway we hung out once more last week and then we were planning on hanging out again yesterday. Having an actual date. But he ended up not being able to make it. Something about getting lost?? ha

What I'm wondering is, did I fuck it up by moving way too fucking fast? I like him a lot. And he just doesn't seem to want to talk to me that much lately.
Click to expand...

The problem when things move too fast is that you're left in that awkward period where you don't know, "Was it just a one-time hookup?" or "Is he looking to date?".

If you are interested in this guy, the only way you're going to resolve this is to have the talk that you should have had before the two of you got naked. It's quite simple, "I think you're a great guy and I enjoy hanging out with you. Are we just friends or are we more than friends?"

As Lex would say:

Talk to him.

Not us.

Him.
 
Well...may have messed it up further.

Haven't heard much from him since I wrote this. I've been thinking about him alot. I wrote this to him earlier this afternoon and haven't gotten a reply.

"how was your weekend? mine was...different ha. but amazing.

I wanted to send you a message cos I've been thinking a lot and was just wondering about some stuff. I had a really good time when you were here and it wasn't just the making out and cuddling, but just the hanging out! I think you're really cool, really chill and we could have a LOT of fun together in the future. that first night just driving around smoking...perfect dude. that's about all I need honestly.

I don't know if this freaks you out but I thought about you pretty much all weekend.

I just wonder what you think about me. I'm freaked out to ask you about this because I don't wanna mess anything up. I finally feel like I met a cool guy that I'm actually interested in and I just don't wanna fuck it up.

I want to know more about you. But it seems like you're pretty busy or maybe you're not that interested in me. It could just be me freaking out. But I just wanna know...

Is this just messing around...or is it something more?

I don't want you to feel bad about anything you say just as long as its honest. Don't worry about hurting my feelings or anything. I can take it a lot better than I can being strung along.

Hope to talk to you soon man!"
 
No...it's cool. Harsh is what I need.

You're right. It did sound paranoid. I think I might need to just cool it really.

It sucks cos I do like him a lot. But I think with my inexperience I just pushed it too hard.
 
bwbw86 said:
Well...may have messed it up further.
Click to expand...

Well, there's no "it" at this point to mess up. So, you don't have anything to lose.

The first three paragraphs of your message were just fine. Lesson learned: sometimes simple, short, sweet and honest is best.
 
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