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Clumsy, no literary imagination at all.
Put the B5 references back, and you do it this way:
... the faun lay dead on the ground, the beast gone. Visions spun in his brain, visions of things and creatures far away. Had they been real? Was he delirious? There had been advice in those visions, but he remembered only one thing: powers beyond him offered him paths, and it was his choice -- turn to the darkness and be like the creature that had killed the faun, or stand to face fire and storm defying that darkness. No one could make him choose, it was his coin toss to call.
Or he could be an innocent, and ignore it all. But the sight of the torn dead fairy creature in front of him dashed that idea: look what innocence had brought it!
Choose, Crelwyn, he told himself...
Not yet, he answered. I'm not ready yet. Then he went and kissed the faun's forehead, for no reason he could think of; it just seemed right....
