Premature ejaculation

[toyasex]

Well, the thing is that for a while now I've noticed that when I masturbate, I ejaculate very fast, like 30 secons or a minute into it. Also, when I get too aroused, like watching porn or something, I suddenly cum without control, even without touching me. And on occasions, especially when I'm the most aroused, my right ball starts to hurt right after cumming. I am kinda worried about it.

Also, and I don't know how related or unrelated this is, right after I cum, I get turned off immediately, not even ten seconds after. I'm still hard after it, but it's super hard to concentrate on something to keep me aroused, and soon the erection is gone.

How concerned should I be? Does anyone is or has been in a similar situation?

Should I go see a doctor?

 

[KaraBulut]

A couple of additional questions:

1. How old are you and is this something that just started or has it been going on for a while?
2. How often are you masturbating and how often are you using porn in connection with masturbation?

 

[toyasex]

A couple of additional questions:

1. How old are you and is this something that just started or has it been going on for a while?
2. How often are you masturbating and how often are you using porn in connection with masturbation?

1. I'm 31, and this has been going on for about a year. Before that I had been able to control my emisions normally.
2. I masturbate, say, three to four times a week. I actually don't masturbate when watching porn, I masturbate while I shower, and in the shower I try to train myself to last longer, like going almost to the point of ejaculating and then stoping and trying to hold back, repeating a few more times.

When it comes to porn, occasionally (not often, like once a month) I like to pull an all nighter watching porn, not masturbating, just watching, but if I get too excited by a particular scene, the climax is so high that I cum without even touching myself. It's frustrating because after that all the rush is immediately gone.

 

[darian]

right after I cum, I get turned off immediately, not even ten seconds after. I'm still hard after it, but it's super hard to concentrate on something to keep me aroused, and soon the erection is gone.

Men have a refractory period after ejaculation, during which further interest in sex is diminished and arousal reduces: it's quite normal. The penis is often very sensitive during this period and stimulation can be perceived as actually painful. Only the very young or those who have developed specific techniques that bypass the usual ejaculatory process seem to be able to keep going, rapidly.

Edging could conceivably result in discomfort because you are continually engorging tissues but preventing release in a process that is not usual within the biological sexual mechanism. Inflammation of tissues often causes discomfort because that is not their normal state. Whilst edging may lead to a more satisfactory result temporarily, it is not biologically "usual" and thus could have unintended consequences (as can not ejaculating for a long time lead to "blue balls" discomfort).

Did you take up edging because your previous experience was becoming less satisfying?

Similarly, masturbating in the shower as the sole, long term method of sexual stimulation is not biologically "usual" and could have unexpected side effects such as tolerance and adaptation. Perhaps you could try different stimulation techniques and environments that more closely mimic biological sex, to switch things around occasionally and see if that makes a difference to the result. It's not impossible that your body is so adapted to the shower stimulation technique that it is anticipating the result as soon as you feel the warm water and taking a short-cut.

Perhaps you could take the time to go back to basics and get back in touch with yourself and what various types of stimulation over your whole body feels like. Reading about prostate and full body orgasms, one thing becomes clear and that is we often ignore the subtle bodily sensations of arousal in a rush to traditional orgasm/ejaculation, when they can also bring pleasure and trigger other types of sexual experience if we take the time to smell the roses as it were.

 

[darian]

Well, the thing is that for a while now I've noticed that when I masturbate, I ejaculate very fast, like 30 secons or a minute into it.

I have a similar issue and it feels like the arousal sensations are so overwhelming that it speeds the process to completion too rapidly: like it's charging ahead of my ability to catch up and affect it.

More recently I have attempted to get more in touch with the subtle sensations of arousal and to go very slow with stimulation, focusing on only small areas of my body at a time. I have found this slows arousal to the point that I can follow the buildup without it getting ahead of me and resulting in ejaculation more when I want it and with a bit more feeling than I normally get. However, it is "frustrating" in that the process is very far from the traditional wham-bam-thank-you-maam expectation of sex that I grew up with. So I have to question what it is that I want: to experience the most sexual enjoyment that I can or to follow the traditional template and expectations of sex.

When it comes to porn, occasionally (not often, like once a month) I like to pull an all nighter watching porn, not masturbating, just watching, but if I get too excited by a particular scene, the climax is so high that I cum without even touching myself. It's frustrating because after that all the rush is immediately gone.

Isn't a high climax what you are aiming for? The fact that it occurs just through visual stimulation is unusual, but not necessarily unexpected given it is intense stimulation and orgasm is all in the mind anyway. Ejaculation almost always ends the experience and if you had a satisfactory rush, why be frustrated (unless you dislike the lack of control over the process)?

Perhaps consider what is most important to you and just relax over achieving it. Maybe you have an unrealistic expectation that sex should only ever follow a very narrow and specific modus operandi. My own experiences are suggesting I have been constraining myself to a narrow vision of how sex is supposed to be, when I personally need something different for whatever reason. The difficult thing is letting go of the stereotypes and the security of belonging to them, in favour of individual satisfaction.