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Private Message Etiquette

BenF

BenF

Vodka and mouthwash
Joined
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Now that my thread about the private message that I received from a member saying

Youre going to die alone :)
Click to expand...

has been pulled for no good reason by the prefects; I was advised by one of them that it is "bad form" to post private messages in a thread (I shall spare you, dear reader, from the rest of the patronising guff in the second PM).

Whilst I accept that normal PMs probably shouldn't be posted in the open forum, I do think that unsolicited and uninvented correspondence (especially if abusive) should be considered fair-game and non-confidential and the cowardly arseholes should be named and shamed.

There was a reason that I didn't press the Reporting Button - the reason being is that it is for knob-ends.

My question is:

Is it always unacceptable to share the contents of a PM on the open board?

Some clarification is needed.
 
Whilst I think naming and shaming has its merits, it will prolly deteriorate into a mass bukkake session of vitriol against named whoeveritis. Now that would fall foul of the CoC guidlines

:goodevil:
 
In my experience there have been times where PMs have been shared and deemed acceptable when there is little or no controversy in the shared PM. When there is controversy or a whiff of drama, then the whole thing is tidied up, so I suppose there is no hard and fast rule when it comes to sharing PMs.
 
BenF said:
Is it always unacceptable to share the contents of a PM on the open board?
Click to expand...

326023.jpg

Can I share this pm, Mods?
 
Inwood said:
In my experience there have been times where PMs have been shared and deemed acceptable when there is little or no controversy in the shared PM. When there is controversy or a whiff of drama, then the whole thing is tidied up, so I suppose there is no hard and fast rule when it comes to sharing PMs.
Click to expand...

No hard and fast rule - but in general it's pretty easy. If you share a message which was meant to be private to mock, insult, ridicule or otherwise expose another JUBber in a negative way it will get removed.
If you share a PM with either sensitive data or where the sender tells us he doesn't want it to be shared - it gets removed.
If you share a PM from a mod it will probably get removed (unless we see an educational value in the resulting thread). If a mod PMs you in his "mod role" it is between you and the mod. We don't run around an tell the whole board which member we slapped for what, and expect the members to do the same.


BenF said:
There was a reason that I didn't press the Reporting Button - the reason being is that it is for knob-ends.
Click to expand...

Yes you are a tough guy who can deal with it on his own, no need for telling the mods.
But not tough enough to keep quiet about it, eh? It's hard to be a tough guy if the mob isn't cheering you, isn't it?
 
Sorry but I would prefer that obusive PMs be treated as private and reported if you feel the need.

There really is sufficient agressivity here without providing an additional means of creating more.
 
Corny said:
Yes you are a tough guy who can deal with it on his own, no need for telling the mods.
But not tough enough to keep quiet about it, eh? It's hard to be a tough guy if the mob isn't cheering you, isn't it?
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Au contraire, Herr Corny. It wasn't because I needed some positive reinforcement from The Mob that I started the thread, it was because I found the randomness of the message so amusing, that I wanted to share it with the rest of the board.
 
So why the need to add and emphasize his name then ;) ? That's not less pointing fingers than just clicking the report button. Au contraire.
 
Corny said:
So why the need to add and emphasize his name then ;) ? That's not less pointing fingers than just clicking the report button. Au contraire.
Click to expand...

Why not share his name?

If I wanted [STRIKE]The Scooby Gang[/STRIKE], [STRIKE]Breakfast Club[/STRIKE], [STRIKE]Ladies Detective Agency[/STRIKE] Mod Squad to investigate the member, I would have asked you to. I didn't, hence I didn't press your silly little button.
 
BenF said:
Why not share his name?

If I wanted [STRIKE]The Scooby Gang[/STRIKE], [STRIKE]Breakfast Club[/STRIKE], [STRIKE]Ladies Detective Agency[/STRIKE] Mod Squad to investigate the member, I would have asked you to. I didn't, hence I didn't press your silly little button.
Click to expand...

Scooby is cool..................

images
 
*Wanders in .... reads posts .... yawns .... wanders out.*
 
A google search for JUB revealed the following extract
326025.jpg


So I dare say that JustUsBoys being "Trusted Gay Porn Experts for over 10 Years" now............how dare anyone querstion the "Gay Porn" experts!
 
I actually didn't have a problem outing someone who is unknown who sent a random message.

I think the secret is to make a more oblique thread about it, so that it all seems more hypothetical, but that the poster clearly knows that one more step over the line and they are going to get a complaint registered against them.

I refuse to dignify a PM poster who sends a hate post with a personal response back, but like Ben, don't see why the first response would be to tattle to the hall monitors either.

Just a warning shot across the bow may be all that was needed.

And everyone knows that Ben and I don't always see eye to eye on things, so this isn't me with my nose up his glutei maximi.
 
BenF said:
Why not share his name?

If I wanted [STRIKE]The Scooby Gang[/STRIKE], [STRIKE]Breakfast Club[/STRIKE], [STRIKE]Ladies Detective Agency[/STRIKE] Mod Squad to investigate the member, I would have asked you to. I didn't, hence I didn't press your silly little button.
Click to expand...

But when will you press my button, Ben?
 
Ben, did you reply his PM ? and what did you say.

If you didn't reply, why not.
 
Well - of course, Ben always did want to work by his rules and not the ones generally accepted by everyone else.

I was going to post something - but given that Corny has already done so, the only thing I shall add is, should someone receive a PM which concerns them, it can be reported - or there is always the 'Ask the Mods' forum to make enquiries about it.

Either of those is preferable to making a public issue out of it by quoting the alleged PM AND the name of the alleged poster.
 
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