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Problem with my first experience

  • Thread starter Thread starter island123
  • Start date Start date
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island123

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Hey! Well... a few days ago I had my first sexual experience. After so many years of wanting to do something, I finally got the chance with this amazing guy. The problem was...that I couldn't get an erection! :confused: I was so frustrated. I know this was performance anxiety( I mean, it was my first time doing anything!).

Do any of you have any advice? I would really appreciate it (*8*)
 
no advice, other than: don't worry!
it can happen, just be relaxed and take your time.
the more confident you'll be, the less problems you'll have.

don't rush things

enjoy!
 
Well, I'm not a medical person, so can't speak with much authority about this, but...

It's happened to me a few times too. Usually when I was way too emotionally aroused by a guy, or I thought he was in a league well beyond mine. In my first relationship it was weeks before I could top my boyfriend, I wanted to so much but when it came time to perform I just lost my erection. Like I said that went on for weeks and became very frustrating. Eventually I was able to do it. (And it was worth the wait. :-) ) As for bottoming, well sometimes I stay hard and sometimes I don't, it's a situational thing and I don't ever worry about that anymore.
 
I'm not a specialist but from the little experience I have I think it's perfectly normal.

You were probably too worried about actualy being with a guy for the first time, that you let it get in the way... Next time, just try to relax and let desire take control, talk with your partner and ask him to help you. And enjoy every moment of with him!! ..|
 
Hey, island 123. That happened to me, too, but it was so long ago, I'd forgotten about it. I hope your partner is a good guy. If so, he'll understand and not put any pressure on you. Mine was a super good guy. The main problem and a few minor ones all disappeared with time. I'll bet the same thing will happen to you!
 
It happens to us all at one time or another ... just don't rush ... take your time and enjoy yourself and your partner ... IT will rise to the occassion as needed ... Take care and Play Safe !!
 
First experiences are always the hardest! There is the fear of prforming for the firt time. fear of rejection, fear of not knowing exactly what to do! So many things play into a first time. As others have said, take your time, RELAX, and all wil be cool.

I was emailing and talking to my old xbf for months before we met! I was so excited that we where finally going to meet!!!!!! Was too excited and I also wanted our relationship to work! Guess what? There were days when I to could not get an erection!! Happens to all of us.....so as I said, chil out and enjoy your friend the next time!
 
What can I add? The others have all said it and I can't say it any better. It happens, no worries!
 
Thank you!!! I'll try to relax next time. It was just weird because I was so excited, yet I couldn't function!
 
It's happened to all of us at one time or another...not to worry.

You really just need to believe in your own sexual ability, and relax.

And when it happens to your partner, you need to be sensitive to it too.....
 
Hey island.

Like the guys have said... it happens to all of us at some stage or another! We'd all like to believe that we can get it up and perform at the drop of a hat but the truth is really that there are just times that despite what we so desperately want we just don't work!

Dont worry about it... relax. Its normal.

Just try to be in the moment next time...dont worry about the next step or what you have to do next when you're with your man, just feel whats happening right there and then... in that second.

Notice the tastes and smells and heat. Just get lost in that very moment as if it was all that was going to happen... the rest will unfold itself. When you just let go and look at it as relaxing fun and beautiful the pressure just disappears.

Then before you knowing you'll be poking eyes out with that thing!
 
It is quite common and it's nothing to worry about. Relax as best you can, try to enjoy what's happening and don't stress about who you're with - they WANT to be with you and that's a pretty damned good feeling!
 
As far as I'm concerned, sex is a journey, not a destination. (Not that the destination doesn't kick ass.) Don't worry about it at all. Most guys know that it can't happen, and most won't take it personally. Best bet - joke about it. "Looks like I've got a bit of performance anxiety." Then spend some time making out, or give him head for awhile. And throw yourself completely into what you're doing, and what he's doing to you. Don't keep checking to see how hard you're getting. Just enjoy what's going on now.

Lex
 
Thank you guys. I will surely follow all of your advice next time. I really appreciate the help and support you so kindly offer here to many :)
 
Performance anxiety. It happens to a lot of guys. My first time was the same. I couldn't stay erect.
 
island123 said:
Hey! Well... a few days ago I had my first sexual experience. After so many years of wanting to do something, I finally got the chance with this amazing guy. The problem was...that I couldn't get an erection! :confused: I was so frustrated. I know this was performance anxiety( I mean, it was my first time doing anything!).

Do any of you have any advice? I would really appreciate it (*8*)
Click to expand...

Not an rare problem at times especially if you are very anxious. Relax and don't rush it. Next time start with some prolonged, hot foreplay and your cock will respond appropriately. Good luck and enjoy.
 
just go slow be relaxed and let nature take it's course, dont be in a hurry. If you let it get to you it may come back next time. so dont worry about it. Just relax.
 
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