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Question about Cheating

marquismike

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I haven't formed a strong opinion either way, but the topic came up in conversation earlier today, and I had never really considered it before and decided to throw the question up to the collective wisdom of JUB.

Would you consider jerking off with a buddy to be cheating on your significant other?
If not, where would you draw the line? Lending a helping hand? More than just one friend in the room?

And, more importantly, would the sexual orientation of those involved make a difference? For example, would it be cheating if a gay man in a relationship beat off with a buddy, vs if a heterosexual man in a relationship with a woman did the same thing?

Looking forward to your responses :-)
 
if, afterward, you feel like you need to hide the activities from your partner, I'd call it cheating.

yes, cheating is however you both have defined it.

If you have an understanding with your partner that there will be no sexual related activities with anyone else (including JO) then yes it would be cheating.
 
Questions like this are why I like clear, well defined boundaries.

It may not be grandly romantic to sit down and talk expectations, but it does eliminate all the confusion.
 
For me, cheating is basically a betrayal of trust--it's doing anything that one would have to hide through lying and deception.

It doesn't really matter what the act is. If a couple agrees that fucking someone is okay, but flirting is not, then flirting is cheating, and fucking is not. I think the variance in what's considered cheating is quite large. But, I think one thing is universal--if it's done behind your +1's back, then it is cheating.

So, to answer the question more directly: if my +1 did this behind my back, I definitely consider it cheating. If he asked me if it'd be ok that he jerk off with someone else, I'd probably not be okay with it, unless I get to join in or watch. That would be my line.
 
Some people think they can separate sex from emotion. My question is why? Consistent treatment of people as objects may be a sign of sex addiction.
 
And what everyone else has said.

Couldn't say it better.

I do think though that it is possible for sex to be just about the pleasure of it and not about an emotional attachment.

Kind of like playing volleyball.
 
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