Rant.

[glasvegas]

Unlike most of the people posted here, I generally don't have any issues with my sexual orientation. I mean I used to. But now, I just want to know who I am. I know deep down inside, I already knew, but somehow, I am too blind to see it. So here goes.

When I was little, around, 10 years old where you finally see the 'light', I got aroused when guys are shirtless. Well, I thought it was normal, and never told anyone about it. From then, I always check out when there is shirtless guys around, be it in reality or in tv. When I hit puberty, that feelings went away. I met a girl, we got really close and I really love her, she's awesome in very way, and I did told her that I wanted to date her but she turned me down, but we remained best friends, which later she said she's actually a lesbian, that's why she can't be with me. The second girl I fall in love with, she's insecure, she doesn't know that she is pretty and she has it all, but I didn't ask her out because we been friends and she said that it'll be awkward if her friends asked her out. Since then, my feelings for guys came back. I started noticing guys more. But still romantically involved with a few girls which ended up with nothing. Three of them rejected me, one asked me out a year later which I ignored, another two is just flirting, when it got serious, I back out,because they aren't really my type.

I am so confuse. I mean, do I really like guys? I did asked a guy out, he's my friend and he's curious too, but the fact is that I know I don't really like him, I just wanted to experience. When, I started to post here, I get the attentions, attentions that I never had in real life, and I met a few guys but, a few of them acted like a jerk. They're very nice in the first place but then, once they get what they wanted, they dumped you, removed you and stuff. It does break my heart, I am being serious with everyone I talked to. I generally wanted to be their friends and possible more serious relationship. It kinda turns me off. I am wondering whether I should just stop pursuing guys? But, I do really like to check out guys, wanted to hook up with a guy, and some point, wanted to get fucked by a guy.

Just who I am?

 

[Seasoned]

At first we follow our libido and then our heart. I think the key to your question is your bond with "safe" females. I'd guess you're gay but only you have the ability to know for sure.

Remember you are dealing with people and not things or pets. The chemistry has to be right for dating. Hook ups are a different matter, but it seems as if you are looking for something more. That requires some work and perhaps a lot of patience.

 

[I-Like-Dudes]

I consider my sexual orientation as follows: 70 percent of me likes guys, and 30 percent of me likes girls. In middle and high school I never loved a girl. I always got crushes on guys. You're the other way around. When you said that you liked girls before, that showed me that you are probably like 80 percent straight and 20 percent gay. Being bisexual doesn't have to be 50/50.

Also, you may just be curious. Or you may just need someone, and since you're giving up on girls, that leaves guys. (Don't give up on anything you want)

Another important thing to note is that there's no reason to put a label to it. It's human nature to want to know everything about yourself, but if you're labeled (by yourself) then you may also be constricted to it.

 

[glasvegas]

Remember you are dealing with people and not things or pets. The chemistry has to be right for dating. Hook ups are a different matter, but it seems as if you are looking for something more. That requires some work and perhaps a lot of patience.

Thanks for the advice.

 

[glasvegas]

I consider my sexual orientation as follows: 70 percent of me likes guys, and 30 percent of me likes girls. In middle and high school I never loved a girl. I always got crushes on guys. You're the other way around. When you said that you liked girls before, that showed me that you are probably like 80 percent straight and 20 percent gay. Being bisexual doesn't have to be 50/50.

Also, you may just be curious. Or you may just need someone, and since you're giving up on girls, that leaves guys. (Don't give up on anything you want)

Another important thing to note is that there's no reason to put a label to it. It's human nature to want to know everything about yourself, but if you're labeled (by yourself) then you may also be constricted to it.

I think I am more to guys thou. I don't know. I have been thinking of being with a guy lately rather than a girl.

 

[I-Like-Dudes]

I think I am more to guys thou. I don't know. I have been thinking of being with a guy lately rather than a girl.

There's a lot of research on homosexuality, and while I didn't look into it far, it was interesting. Basically it said that people are scaled on how gay they are, and that it changes during your life. You definitely might have changed. Embrace it! (Not that I should be talking- I'm not out yet!!)

 

[glasvegas]

There's a lot of research on homosexuality, and while I didn't look into it far, it was interesting. Basically it said that people are scaled on how gay they are, and that it changes during your life. You definitely might have changed. Embrace it! (Not that I should be talking- I'm not out yet!!)

Kinsley scale? LOL. I am embracing it. My gay side is getting stronger everyday. I been thinking to actually come out to a few of my friends. ( Some of them already knew that I am a flipper but then I wasn't finalize on anything. ) Just hoping that I can study in Australia, a place where no one knows about me, then i can truly be myself. I can gay and hay. LOL

 

[I-Like-Dudes]

Haha sounds like a perfect plan. Australia, eh? I'm jealous!