Room mate with benefits ...

[Telstra]

I think i'm going to have a room mate with benefits.
Already slept with him once both naked and it was very nice. It felt good.

He is very nice, friendly and down to earth.
He wants to move in in a month time and i agreed. mmmm i'm going forward to it.


Anyone is having or had a room mate with benefits?
please tell your story.

 

[Harke the Boeotarch]

 

[Telstra]

^ no no, separate rooms but can be together for fun times.

 

[alley]

Just make sure he understands he's still gotta pay his share--or he's OUT...unless he's really good at the benefits part...then it becomes negotiable.

 

[Telstra]

Yep he pay his share. Nothing is free in this world.
Hope to hear stories about people having a room mate with benefits.
What did they do, what were the common problems ... etc.

 

[Telstra]

^ don't be silly. I'm very normal. But having abit of fun when posting on forums.

 

[alley]

^ don't be silly. I'm very normal. But having abit of fun when posting on forums.

You did not answer--and I have to leave for work.


I'll never find out about his foreskin.

 

[Telstra]

If you have a roommate with benefits Telstra make sure you both understand what the deal is. If he - or you - bring someone else home and one of you thinks this is more than it is you're in for a whole truck load of trouble.

Also, before he moves in make sure you know him well and can live with him once the sex dries up.

I've had a few flatmates in my time - never with benefits though, they've all been female - and it's been nothing but bloody trouble. I'd never have a flatmate again, I'd rather sacrifice something else to have my own home.

Thanks for the advice. We slept together so we know about each other.
Also i think it is important not to hide anything from each other.

I think you should try room mate with benefits.
I won't try a room mate with no benefits.

 

[Telstra]

You did not answer--and I have to leave for work.


I'll never find out about his foreskin.

well, it was cold, we slept with each other naked and i did play with his private parts and licking his nipples. If people don't smell things while doing it, how can you breath in and out ?

No he don't have foreskin.
Actually i did smell his private parts while doing it and it smell fresh and clean.

 

[Telstra]

How often does he do the washing up?
Does he do his laundry weekly or leave it all over the floor until he's out of clean underwear?
Does he clean up behind him or does he just leave it all for you to do later?
Is he a night owl or a morning person?
Does he pay his bills on time or sell you a story that he hasn't got it till next week and can you cover for him?
Does he have friends over at all hours of the day and night?
Does he know how to work a vaccum cleaner or will he just expect you to do it for him?

I know you've slept with him Telstra but that doesn't mean you know anything more important than he is good in bed. I'm not trying to be a shithead, and poke holes, but I am trying to bring to your attention a few things that tend to be really important when you live with someone.

One of my ex-flatmates was a pot-head with OCD and I had no idea before I moved in.

Another of my ex-flatmates started dating my manager and he was in my house all the time. So I had to deal with him all day at work and then all night at home. Trust me you don't want to be in the bedroom above your manager when he's playing Tarzan *shudder*

Another ex-flatmate was a total pig who couldn't boil water without dirtying every single pot, plate and piece of cutlery in the kitchen.

Another flooded the house with the washing machine cause she'd gone to bed and left it on and it went off balance?

Another ex-flatmate started dating the ex-boyfriend of our then flatmate and let me tell you fun and frivolity did not follow that decision.

Living with people is a big decision and if it's something you want and feel able to cope with then I give you 100% support. But you can't go into it with your eyes half closed or hazed by the possibility of sex.

Also, make sure you get paper work drawn up something akin to a lease so that the new flatmate knows exactly what is expected. How much they need to pay for rent, towards utilities, do they buy there own food or do they share what you by.

Just becareful Telstra, I know I joke about with you and your foreskin sniffing fetish but I'd hate to see you make a mistake.

thanks, i never experienced living with someone before.
I don't know what sort of paper work is available. Where can i download the paper work?

 

[voyager1994]

Haven't experienced 'roommate with benefits', the phrase itself sounds very opportunistic and don't like the sound of it quite honestly - kinda inviting trouble eventually. Well hope things work out.

 

[Telstra]

Haven't experienced 'roommate with benefits', the phrase itself sounds very opportunistic and don't like the sound of it quite honestly - kinda inviting trouble eventually. Well hope things work out.

I think room mate with no benefits is not as good because its all about money.
Room mate with benefits is closer and more personal i suppose.

 

[Telstra]

I wonder if there is any room mate paper work on the net.

 

[voyager1994]

I think room mate with no benefits is not as good because its all about money.
Room mate with benefits is closer and more personal i suppose.

I'd still prefer to get a roommate with no personal or emotional expectations whatsoever attached. Keep things between roommates business-like, it's less complicated that way. But that's me.

Otherwise, have a written contract or agreement signed between you and him which is already a business transaction to begin with. Where do you then draw the line between business and personal?

 

[Telstra]

I'd still prefer to get a roommate with no personal or emotional expectations whatsoever attached. Keep things between roommates business-like, it's less complicated that way. But that's me.

Otherwise, have a written contract or agreement signed between you and him which is already a business transaction to begin with. Where do you then draw the line between business and personal?

That is a very good question.
Thats why i made the thread to see if people had such experiences.

 

[fabulouslyghetto]

A mess. Roommates = trouble, friends with benefits = trouble to fucking a roommate = trouble squared.

Be careful girl.

 

[AdmiraalW238]

I wonder if there is any room mate paper work on the net.

In New South Wales a roommate is not covered by any of the tenant rules that apply under the Tenancy Act. You can get a standard rental agreement from most newsagencies but there is nothing to stop you from creating your own specific rental agreement in a word document that covers things like the length of the tenancy (suggest just making it a month to month tenancy) with a stiplulation of each giving each a two week written notice of termination, how much the rent is, when it is due, a clause that stiplulates that all utilities are split equally and things of that nature.

My housemate and I have such an agreement and we basically have an agreement as to the utilities/food/internet/phone/electricity. Basically for us I pay my rent and then pay for all the food shopping and he pays all the utilities but I keep a running excel spreadsheet going so that I split the food bill and he knows what he owes and then when he pays a utilities bill I deduct my share from anything that he owes me for food shopping. Once my spreadsheet hits a specific figure that he owes and there are no bills due the housemate brings what he owes down to zero and pays me.

This works for us but may not necessarily work for you.

But make sure you get something in writing to protect yourself.

 

[Telstra]

Thanks AdmiraalW238,
yeah i google search and found Tenancy general agreement.

 

[fetaby]

My roommate and I once had a friends with benefits arrangement. At one point, I developed more feelings for him. It didn't go where I wanted it too. So I dealt with it. (Isolation and icecream) Once I finally got over it and started seeing other people, he confessed to having feelings for me! But he dealt with it. (Isolation and a serious compulsion to buy DVDs)
We have since completely dropped off the benefits and remain best friends. We'd do anything for each other if asked.

As far as the bills and such. We both split the rent 50-50. He pays the electricity bill. I pay the cable/internet bill. Food- I buy the food I want to eat and he buys the food he wants to eat. Our tastes are really different so this works out well. Any other bills are the ones which solely belong to either of us so we don't get mixed up into paying things for eachother. (car notes, insurance, cell phones)

I don't think you need to worry as much with the monetary side of all this though. I'd say the biggest thorns are going to be falling for each other, and then domestic lifestyles. My roomie and I realy only disagree about the tidyness of our place. I'm the type of person that leaves things where ever they are last used otherwise I'll never be able to find something when I need. At which point a mad dash of looking through every drawer and searching every cupboard ensues.

Who knows this may turn out to be the best thing for you.
My question to you. What are you exactly wanting from this guy in terms of the whole situation? Help with the rent/bills? Casual no strings attached sex? Or the chance that you two will hit it off and become old and grey together?

Whatever, wishing you the best of luck.

 

[Telstra]

My roommate and I once had a friends with benefits arrangement. At one point, I developed more feelings for him. It didn't go where I wanted it too. So I dealt with it. (Isolation and icecream) Once I finally got over it and started seeing other people, he confessed to having feelings for me! But he dealt with it. (Isolation and a serious compulsion to buy DVDs)
We have since completely dropped off the benefits and remain best friends. We'd do anything for each other if asked.

As far as the bills and such. We both split the rent 50-50. He pays the electricity bill. I pay the cable/internet bill. Food- I buy the food I want to eat and he buys the food he wants to eat. Our tastes are really different so this works out well. Any other bills are the ones which solely belong to either of us so we don't get mixed up into paying things for eachother. (car notes, insurance, cell phones)

I don't think you need to worry as much with the monetary side of all this though. I'd say the biggest thorns are going to be falling for each other, and then domestic lifestyles. My roomie and I realy only disagree about the tidyness of our place. I'm the type of person that leaves things where ever they are last used otherwise I'll never be able to find something when I need. At which point a mad dash of looking through every drawer and searching every cupboard ensues.

Who knows this may turn out to be the best thing for you.
My question to you. What are you exactly wanting from this guy in terms of the whole situation? Help with the rent/bills? Casual no strings attached sex? Or the chance that you two will hit it off and become old and grey together?

Whatever, wishing you the best of luck.

thanks for the story.
well, i didn't expect a room mate so suddenly but the oppotunity comes along and i think he is a good person so i said why not. Its all good i think ....