Scally/Chav Lads

[Sniffademskidz]

-Hey Jason! How are you doing? Are you up for a bit of extracurricular activity at my place after school?

-Sure Mr.Jones!

-You know Jason when I first fucked you your hole was so tight but last night I noticed that it is really quite stretchy now and I think there might be room for another dick. The new Science teacher has noticed you and is keen to join us!

So what do you say to a double dicking!?

-Well Sir you are my English teacher and in class yesterday we were studying proverbs and in particular :

"Too many cooks spoil the broth."

So in answer to.your offer all I can say to you is:

"Too many cocks spoil the froth!"

Sorry Sir!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-Come to collect the rent mate and I assume you haven't got it!

-Cause i ain't and let's face it you'd be upset if I had got it cos you've got so.used to fucking me on the first day of the month!

-Yeah you're a filthy bastard but you're a fucking good ride! You know the drill- on the bed with your ankles on.my shoulders!

Try not to get fag ash on my neck!

Kinda got addicted to your shitter so how about I come round every week in exchange for paying your fuel bill and council tax!!!!

Suits me mate! Although I probably get the better deal when I feel that fhcking great black mamba of yours rearranging my guts!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Which lube would you choose!?

This one costing five quid or this one at half the price from Oucher!?

Choose Oucher- think Ouch!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-I've still got that rash on my arse and the doctor told me I need to rub the prescription cream on it twice a day but I've left it at home!

-Don't worry mate I think I've got some cream here that might just do the trick- it's not exactly the same as what you've got but by the time I've applied it I think you'll agree it is just what the doctor ordered!

-Really appreciate that mate! Can you make sure you rub it well into the cheeks and in between them!

Oh yes! On that you can rely!!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-Is your mate doing Tai Chi?

-Well if he is it's purely unintentional-he's pissed out of his fucking head!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-Why the fuck did you let her take the photos! ?You know that she always cuts everyone's head off!

-i know but practice makes perfect and she has made me a solemn promise that when it cums to the naked shots she will make sure that she doesn't cut off his PURPLE head!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-What are you doing down there mate!?

-Just waiting fir you to step out of those jeans and lower your smelly arse onto my face! Once my nose has properly engaged with your pretty pink pucker I have no intention of coming up for air till next Christmas!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

So on the first day of the Ofsted inspection at assembly on the screen go the words of the first hymn but it is not:

"Oh for a thousand tongues to sing Thy great redeemer's praise!"

But

"Oh for a thousand tongues to rim our great headmaster's arse!!!"

Thanks for that Bradley!

Oh come on Sir! You know this school stinks and while you employ 20 year old teachers with tight buns, donkey dicks and no brains we are always going to score INSUFFICIENT!

You know I'm going to have to spank you for this don't you!

I wouldn't expect anything less Sir! At least you will score OUTSTANDING for that!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Two very firm reasons for not quitting my job as manager of the Homeless Nightshelter!

"Straight up the stairs mate, turn right and room 69 is on your left!

You can't get lost! I'm right behind you! ( Closer than you fucking think!)"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Two very firm reasons for not quitting my job as manager of the Homeless Nightshelter!

"Straight up the stairs mate, turn right and room 69 is on your left!

You can't get lost! I'm right behind you! ( Closer than you fucking think!)"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Isn't he absolutely divine? I'm surprised he didn't do himself some damage when he fell from Heaven!

Observe those perfectips, the high cheek bones, that mischievous little chin so why when he is blessed with such beauty does he wear an expression of extreme sadness!?

The answer lies in what is unseen in this photograph.

He is being rimmed for the first time by the manager of a company who knows that this boy desperately needs the job to get himself out of debt and is prepared to do anything!!!!

Our hearts go out to this boy and I'm sure that you would join with me in offering him any consolation that he desires.............

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Well I've managed to service your stink pipe mate!"

"Time for me to return the favour then!

You know what they say:

"One good turn deserves another!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

It's brilliant being a dog because I can stick my nose up his arse or bury it in his crotch both in private and public with people looking on and laughing cos that's just what dogs do and my hunky owner stroking me and saying:

"Good boy!"

"A man's best friend is his dog!" so let's pray we are all reincarnated as sniffer dogs and I don't mean sniffing for drugs or explosives!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Up here in space I thought we'd be far away from our wives to be able to fuck in peace but we obviously hadn't reckoned with this gravity bollocks!!!!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"When I come home from work I expect my dinner to be on the table!"

"Well you've never raised any objections to eating me before!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Right as soon as he's put his dirty socks and undies in the washing machine you grab them and we sent them off Special Delivery for display in the Tate Modern in London!

If they won't accept them then I'm sending those skidded skuns to Farmers' Weekly cos there's enough man dirt on the seat of those babies to plant a row of strawberries AND be assured of a good crop in the summer!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

All I want for Christmas are his two tight buns, his two tight buns ,yes his two tight buns!

Gee if I could only have his two tight buns
I would spunk up his arse tons and tons!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Never thought I'd still be suffering from acne at my age!"

"I used to have that problem! My doctor refused to give me any pills but told me to have plenty of sex! He told me that I should get married and I said:

"OK Doctor but I'm only 14!

Mind you he was from Pakistan!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Fuckin hell mate! It's tough going! I don't have this trouble when I'm drilling a hole in a piece of wood!

It's like the fucking Amazon forest in there!

Might need to get my electric sander out!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-Hey Matt what's that red spot on your thigh!?

-That's where my pet cobra bit me last week and my girlfriend had to suck out the poison!

-Well if your pet cobra ever bites you on the purple head of that beautiful cock that you flash about in the showers with such pride just phone me and I'll happily suck the poison out of it!

No.need to bother your girlfriend! I'm sure she's very busy and after all it's all part of a physio's job!