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Share Stories of your First visit to a Gay Bar

My first experience at a gay bar was the stonewall inn back at the top of 2012. The anticipation prior to going there was exciting. However when I went in there along with the group that I was with, it was a different story.

One thing is that I experienced racism first hand. The white lesbian bouncer almost kicked me out claiming that I "looked like I didn't belong there". I was there for like 10 minutes with my jacket trying to calm my nerves and this woman who was staring me down stone faced the whole time telling me I have no business being there. One of the guys I was in the group with jumped in and told her that I was with them and she backed the fuck up.

Despite that bullshit, I was able to enjoy the rest of the night. There was a drag show and a male stripper. It was fun.
 
I was on weekend leave from the RAF, i popped into central London and found Old Compton St. So Comptons in London was my 1st gay bar.
 
The first time I went to a gay bar was in the middle of the day. I was 24, still in the closet and had been to an interview in an office building on the end of Oxford Street. After the interview I wandered up Oxford Street for the first time. There was music coming from a bar and I spent a good while working up the courage to walk inside. I had no idea what to expect. I went in and was sort of surprised. The walls were painted in terracotta, the floors were wooden floorboards. There were black and white photos of male nudes on the wall. I bought a beer and went and sat in the corner. A couple at the next table saw me sitting on my own and came over and joined me. We talked for a while, ended up playing pool and drinking long into the afternoon. The population of the club became a lot of older guys and younger Asians. We stayed playing pool and chatting all afternoon. I ended up meeting a French guy that night who was over here on a Rugby trip. He was rather sweet. I came out a week later.
 
we've had some great times in gay bars, but I'm looking forward to a day when everyone can go to every bar and have fun. The gay clubs in NYC were always packed with everyone gay or not who just wanted to dance and party.
 
FPNY said:
we've had some great times in gay bars, but I'm looking forward to a day when everyone can go to every bar and have fun. The gay clubs in NYC were always packed with everyone gay or not who just wanted to dance and party.
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That'd be an interesting thing, but I've got people bitching that I'm in the same bathroom. I doubt they want me in their bar when bars are, in part, used to pick people up.
 
FPNY said:
we've had some great times in gay bars, but I'm looking forward to a day when everyone can go to every bar and have fun. The gay clubs in NYC were always packed with everyone gay or not who just wanted to dance and party.
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I agree with you, but for some reason I have never felt completely comfortable (as much as I can be) in a regular bar. Oddly I feel much more judged in a gay bar though.
 
I was relatively older when I first went into a gay bar. It was the late-1980s. It was Christmas Eve, and I was with a couple of guys that I used to hang around with at an adult book store (this was during my slut puppy days). The place was called Tara, and being late afternoon, it was a fairly tame crowd there. I had a couple of drinks to toast the holidays with them, and went home to join my family for Christmas Eve. To me, it was no different than being in a straight bar, except that most of the guys there were the same sexual orientation as me.
 
I remember now.

It was the Parkside. And once I had been in it, I started to go to all the other bars.

There was one with an older crowd that was referred to as 'The Open Grave'.
 
Thynight said:
I agree with you, but for some reason I have never felt completely comfortable (as much as I can be) in a regular bar. Oddly I feel much more judged in a gay bar though.
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Gay men will definitely judge you...not all of them...but a healthy majority do. Some judgement is good...like accessing a situation that may or may not be dangerous...it is essential to be able to judge the people quickly...

...but ALOT of gay men tear other gay men apart for their clothes or shoes or haircut or weight or body or mannerisms or ...you name it. It is mostly about appearance....and it is kinda embarrassing to listen to and even worse to participate in if that is your thing because it makes the person/persons saying it look really ugly...and insecure. It is very much like straight women who do the same to each other..

...and like straight women..alot of them grow out of it when they mature. Some never mature. Some never needed to mature because they never participated in that bullshit........

BUT...straight people will judge you more on WHO YOU ARE versus what you look like in a straight bar...and it isn't always a pleasant experience if you are gay...or different...depends on the straight person and the environment. All you need is one loud closet case and he can wreck havoc
 
DantheManFL said:
I ran across this interesting article of people's first visit to a gay bar, great read:

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/06/23/f...l-maddow-alexander-wang-andy-cohen-share.html

My first time was when I was 17. I went to downtown Orlando with my best friend because we'd heard there were gay people there. We stumbled upon a parking lot with entrances on two streets. Cars made the loop through there, sometimes pulling in beside other cars to chat. About a month later, I was there, and this really cute 23 y/o dark haired guy that had just gotten out of the Navy pulled in next to me. We hit it off. He asked me if I wanted to go to the Palace Club. I said sure. They didn't check my ID, but they sure weren't going to turn away the hot Navy man, lol. I walked in that place, and I was totally blown away! It was New Year's Eve, and there must have been 2,000 people in there, partying and having the time of their lives. I knew I had found my tribe. :D
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After the Orlando shooting,
crowded place like this is abit scary if the security is not up to standard.
 
rareboy said:
I remember now.

It was the Parkside. And once I had been in it, I started to go to all the other bars.

There was one with an older crowd that was referred to as 'The Open Grave'.
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Wow, what a great name for the club :)
Honest
 
^ That wasn't the actual name of the bar. That is just how we all referred to it.

By the way, all of these bars started out just to the north and east of the Maple Leaf Gardens in Toronto. As well as the Club Baths in the neighbourhood.

During hockey season, they would be full of all these married or 'straight' guys who were supposed to be at the game but were actually out for some man on man action.
 
I walked in and saw a lot of sweaty hot guys stripped to the waist, so I shed my shirt and began to make my way through the crowd. After about 2 or 3 minutes I locked eyes with a handsome, perfectly muscled, dark-haired Italian who, stroking my chest said, "Blond, muscular, smooth, just my type." Other than that, I remember little except how long and hard he fucked me back at his place, and how hot it felt that there were no preliminaries--he just pushed me onto his bed and shoved his cock up my ass. He knew what he wanted and he took it.
 
LatimerRd said:
I walked in and saw a lot of sweaty hot guys stripped to the waist, so I shed my shirt and began to make my way through the crowd. After about 2 or 3 minutes I locked eyes with a handsome, perfectly muscled, dark-haired Italian who, stroking my chest said, "Blond, muscular, smooth, just my type." Other than that, I remember little except how long and hard he fucked me back at his place, and how hot it felt that there were no preliminaries--he just pushed me onto his bed and shoved his cock up my ass. He knew what he wanted and he took it.
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Now we all want to know the name of the bar and how long it takes to get there from here.
 
My first time was before I was out aged 18 in London. Not much to say about that really, beyond I got drunk.

The first real I went to a gay bar while out was in Amsterdam (there have never been any gay bars or even nights in any other town I have lived). It was the Cuckoo's Nest - so a bit of a deep end jump in some ways. Pretty much wall to wall porn upstairs and dark rooms downstairs. I ended up getting groped by some guy called Hakan, who I think took my acceptance of his joint as me wanting to sleep with him - he was very wrong. Rest of the night I spent upstairs getting drunk with some decent enough guys, one of whom I ended up staying friends with and going to a few house nights with. Pretty solid night really - but not entirely my scene. Much more comfortable with more laid back.
 
Believe it or not i have never been to a gay bar or club before.
I went to a bathhouse first to see whats happening LOL, and hooked in there ever since. Not there for sex much but for the heat, steam and sweat. Now i work in the bathhouse :)
 
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