Should I go for a\the girl? I'm confused

[snakkie]

So, here is the thing:

I'm a 20yo guy that is mostly attracted to man. I am only attracted to woman sometimes (rarely), but, even when that happens, I'm afraid to go further into them. I don't know if can do the job right (like have an erection - even that I can have it while seeing straight porn. And yes, while imagining that i'm f*cking the girl, not looking into the guys dick. )

So, I am mostly gay.

But it happens that I'm becoming tired of being single, because of the lack of that all good things that we can have from a relationship. And like most of you know, being a mostly gay guy in an (aparent) straight world, turns to not be easy to find "that guy".

So what is happening?

I had flirted and made out with this girl several times in past months, and she is teasing me again. I like her, and I think she likes me. She seems interesting and someone who can satisfy my "relationship needs" (sorry for this egoist term). The problem, I confess, is that I'm not sexually attracted to her. And this puts me into a confusing position.

Some part of me wants to start a relationship with someone, even that only a soft one. I'm lacking of this love, and in that way I can absolutely have a relationship with a girl.
The other part of me is afraid, because I know that this is not what I really am attracted for, and I'm afraid that things go wrong while trying something with her (and then have to it explain all, and say that I'm gay etc etc).

So the reason because I write this, is because I would like to hear what you all (from this great community) have to say. What you would do in my position and what similar experiences you had, and how they went.

 

[iwantbig]

make the most of what you've got , if it dont work you can allways put it down to experience , which at 20 is something you need the most,.
besides maybe she wants to fuck you with a huge strappon

 

[easyroad]

It seems that you're looking for the easiest solution but not the best one. In fact, it's dishonest, and that's a big problem. You should be honest with her. You don't even have to say you're gay, just say you're not attracted to her - that's not a lie, is it?

Also, if she's cool about it, you could still have a "soft relationship" with her: it's called friendship.

 

[sixthson]

Snakkie, you can take comfort in knowing you are not alone in your feelings. Many of us have, at some point in time for one reason or another, wished we did not have to deal with being gay. You do know, I hope, that attraction is more than physical/sexual? For the sake of argument, let's say you could get your dick to do what you wanted it to do with a girl. Could you get your heart to do the same? Being gay is about who we love and not just with whom we want to have sex.

Good luck, buddy.

 

[mano]

Go to your nearest mirror and be honest with yourself about what you are feeling and how you see things. Yeah....you may not be sure of everything and may have some doubts and confusions, but tell that guy in the mirror as much truth as you can. Then go be honest with her. The possibilities may range from her hating your guts to you finding out that this really is the perfect relationship. This situation MIGHT crash and burn with you telling the truth. It will FOR SURE crash and burn sooner or later if you are trying to live a lie and be something you are not. You are going to be a stressed out nervous wreck if you cannot be who you are. I wish you the best and let us know how it goes.

And one more thing.....most of the time, I like being single. Take a serious look and make sure that you really need someone in your life 24/7.

 

[alli-berri]

I think your big problem here is anxiety. You say you're concerned about getting it up or not. I say don't worry about it. If she knows what she's doing, you're going to feel good and get hard. The only thing that will hold you back is your own mind.

That said, if you don't think you can get beyond the idea of being with a woman, you probably shouldn't pursue it. But it sounds like you are able to intimately interact with her and have a good time, so I don't think you will have too much trouble.

And do be honest. Tell her you're bi - which you probably are. It's OK to be more "gay" than "straight" while still being bi. You may even realize "Whoa, I definitely AM gay" - well, good thing you tried something new out, and learned the truth about yourself, right?

It's certainly not wrong to explore what each sex has to offer in the way of emotional and sexual gratification. As long as you are genuinely expressing yourself to them and doing your part in the relationship (however long it lasts), then there's really nothing to feel shameful or concerned about.

 

[stevexxx]

So, here is the thing:

I'm a 20yo guy that is mostly attracted to man. I am only attracted to woman sometimes (rarely), but, even when that happens, I'm afraid to go further into them. I don't know if can do the job right (like have an erection - even that I can have it while seeing straight porn. And yes, while imagining that i'm f*cking the girl, not looking into the guys dick. )

So, I am mostly gay.

But it happens that I'm becoming tired of being single, because of the lack of that all good things that we can have from a relationship. And like most of you know, being a mostly gay guy in an (aparent) straight world, turns to not be easy to find "that guy".

So what is happening?

I had flirted and made out with this girl several times in past months, and she is teasing me again. I like her, and I think she likes me. She seems interesting and someone who can satisfy my "relationship needs" (sorry for this egoist term). The problem, I confess, is that I'm not sexually attracted to her. And this puts me into a confusing position.

Some part of me wants to start a relationship with someone, even that only a soft one. I'm lacking of this love, and in that way I can absolutely have a relationship with a girl.
The other part of me is afraid, because I know that this is not what I really am attracted for, and I'm afraid that things go wrong while trying something with her (and then have to it explain all, and say that I'm gay etc etc).

So the reason because I write this, is because I would like to hear what you all (from this great community) have to say. What you would do in my position and what similar experiences you had, and how they went.

okay of she is hot then go out with her and start a relationship, have sex, get her pregnant, and get married. if she isn't hot then dont go out with her.

 

[snakkie]

thanks for all the answers guys!
I think I will try my luck

And sorry for taking so long to reply again on this thread, but ive been a little busy this last days.

 

[snakkie]

And one more thing.....most of the time, I like being single. Take a serious look and make sure that you really need someone in your life 24/7.

Oh, I love being single. I always 've been a single type of guy. But now i'm becoming a little tired, and wish i had someone to share some experiences of my life, and help me in others.
And I'm not searching for someone to be with 24h\7days, fortunately there are various of love relationships that we can have with someone. Some people like to be together all the time, others prefer to just be with that someone in some moments. etc etc But that is other topic.

Thanks again guys

 

[alli-berri]

Good luck, man! And let us know how it goes, if you feel so inclined.