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Should i try a dating website?

J

JaydenLuke

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As some of you know, I would love to be in a relationship but I don't really know how to meet anyone because im not out yet. My only fear about joining a site is that im going to find people who just want to hook up and that's not what im looking for. I personally don't do casual sex. And I worry that the relationship wont work out. but I don't want to continue being alone so I have been thinking about it. what should I do? and if u do think I should do it, could u suggest some sites or apps? preferably free ones.
 
I'm exactly in your same boat. I recently joined match.com and it has been a good experience, so far. I've also met some nice people on manhunt, not just looking for sex, but most there are. Match will cost you money to do anything worthwhile, but if you are serious about meeting people in a "respectful" way and aren't ready to put yourself out there at the gay bar, then it's worth it. Good luck.
 
Well, I suppose a dating website would be one way to put yourself out there. Though I imagine a majority of people would probably only want to hook up, but you can simply just tell them no.
 
There will always be people just looking for a hook-up. Just be clear about what you want and say you're looking for dates and friends, and not just casual sex on your profile.
 
I used a dating site 8 1/2 years ago and we have been together ever since!!! So give it a try
 
Personally I think you should come out before getting involved in any relationship. It's not fair to the other guy to have to hide like you do. Get yourself together before adding one more to the equation.
 
most guys on dating websites are looking to hook up, but there are always those that arent. you should be really clear in your profile about what youre looking for, but there will still be those that approach you for hook-ups. you just have to be aware of that, and accept it in advance. if you get irritated each time some guy tries to hook up with you, youll get bitter very quickly. just be relaxed about it. if someone wants to hook up, just stay relaxed and move on. dont get irritated or judgemental.

thats my answer to the question you asked. now some advice you didnt ask for: im assuming youre inexperienced and young. i think it wouldnt hurt to keep an open mind about... everything. its not smart to go into something you know little to nothing about with a rigid mindset. you think you know exactly what you want - you dont want to come out (yet), you dont want to hook up, you want to be in a relationship - but youre making decision from an armchair about something you have no actual experience in, and i think you may be making things difficult for yourself. im not saying you should do what you dont want to, im just saying... well, just keep an open mind. perhaps its easier to immerse yourself in "the gay world" and then see where it leads, rather than having a set result in mind (serious relationship!) and work towards it.

also, relationships are going to be hard in the closet. most out men dont date closeted guys.
also also, as long as youre in the closet, youre vulnerable; and there are always predators that will try to take advantage. be careful.
good luck!
 
You keep posting topic after topic trying to circle around the issue of the closet without touching it. There is no good advice for you while you're in the closet. You saw the overwhelming responses to your topic about whether being in the closet allows for a serious relationship - it doesn't. Where you find the person to have a half-life unsustainable relationship is pretty much the least of your problems until you face the issue of being closeted.
 
I understand how it's easier to come out for some people if they are in a relationship. There's no clear blueprint for finding a partner. Some search for a long time; some find a partner by chance.

In the days when and in the places where the closet was/is necessary it became a secret two people had to keep. With more people out of the closet it becomes more difficult for one partner to have to keep the other partner's secret.
 
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