"Sir, this is not telemarketing."

[eddielee]

I listen long enough to figure out it's a telemarketer and I'm not interested. Then I say "no thank you" and hang up. If they keep talking, I still hang up and ignore them.

 

[BearBoi]

I hate it when they fight back and say "no". I remember this telemarketer selling cookbooks who called me. When I said "no, I am going to hang up now", he cried, "no, no! if you don't buy this cookbook, how are you going to eat?". I put the phone and have been starving ever since. Shouldn't have done that

To which you reply, "Does it have recipes for South Asian babies? Because that's all I eat."

Kidding!

(I eat all kinds of babies. )

But seriously, I do know some Hindi, so I start out by saying it's nice to meet them, then I pause, then I start with "how are you? It is nice to hear from you..." but I get progressively worse until I'm just mumbling gibberish.

The funniest is when they start answering before I start with the gibberish. I've had several people beg my pardon because they can't understand my accent. They say it in English, too, which is just adorable.

I highly recommend everyone learn a little Hindi. It is also good for impressing your waiter at Indian restaurants and getting extra deserts for free.

 

[teadrinker]

Get hold of Augusten Burroughs' "Magical Thinking" and read about his dealing with telemarketers. It'll make your day.

I'm incapable of being rude to strangers, so the moment they start speaking (I know it's a telemarketer because there's always a few seconds pause between me saying "Hello" and the telemarketer beginning their spiel) I simply say I'm not interested and hang up.

-T.

 

[The_Reaper]

I got an odd one the other day, where the person on the end of the line was claiming that their 'server' had detected numerous viruses and spyware on my computer.

I simply said not interested when they asked if I knew about these problems, and hung up. I told the boyfriend about it, he's something of a computer guru, and he laughed and simply said "You should have given the phone to me, I could have told them servers don't work like that."

I'm also a poor sucker for telemarketers. To a degree, I know they're just doing their job...So I don't want to be overly rude, after all, they're just doing it for the paycheque. So, I'll usually be polite enough to listen to whatever spiel they have and then simply say no.

I'll even listen to their counter appeal, asking if I'm sure and then giving the little pre-written speech they have to say in order to change my mind...I still say no, wish them a good day and then hang up.

Yes, perhaps I am too polite sometimes.

 

[barnbuddy]

if I pick up and say hello and there is no immediate response, I just hung up

but, I understand, these are just folks trying to make ends meet

it's a job - they need the money - so I don't become indignant

 

[Ontariobear]

With Canada's Do Not Call legislation, an unlisted number and call display I had completely forgotten about these people.