Sniffademskidz's Funny Stuff

[Sniffademskidz]

"There are few pleasures greater than playing strip poker using a marked deck of cards with somebody who doesn't know the rules!

It's just like taking candy from a baby....and hopefully a bit later taking his cherry!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-How did the driving test go Josh!?

-Well I went up a one-way street to start with, then my girfriend texted me a video of herself with her tits out and while i was looking at that we hit an old lady crossing the zebra crossing and dragged her for about half a mile!

Then we ended up in the fruit amd veg aisle of Tesco!

I still passed though!

-Amazing! You must feel great!

Well I've still got a sore bottom but once that wears off I can celebrate!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Any chance of keeping that little baby still while I'm painting you!?

It's very distracting when we go from ten to twelve to midday and now we appear to be at quarter past three!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"I assume you are the company cumdump but correct me if I am wrong!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-You're clearly unfamiliar with.the word TRUST Jake!

-Well this chastity belt was on special offer at Amazon so i bought one for my new boyfriend for his birthday!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-Fill me up buddy!

-Excuse me Sir are you a ventriloquist or did your car just speak!?

-I was speaking for both of us beautiful!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

From where I'm standing i don't think anyone is going to disagree with what it says on the poster!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Sitting on the fence" generally means you are so indecisive you don't know which way to turn!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Gives new meaning to the expression:

"Getting the horn!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"If you can't count at least three choppers you know where you need to go!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"The camera never lies but don't worry too much about having only one ball!

Medical opinion states that you can still fire on one cylinder!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Gives new meaning to the expression:

"I need a screw!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-Any luck finding the fruit bowls!?

-No! What about you!?

-Well I've found the peaches to put in them!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Guaranteed to give any self-respecting boner the droops!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Acne Studios?

A doctor once told me that the best antidote to acne was plenty of sex and these boys look pretty fesh faced so no prizes for guessing what they've been up to!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

The slit on the eyebrow could be an indication of rebellion or a subtle sign of LBGTQ tendencies to anyone of a similar disposition!

This guy is such a horndog that one sincerely hopes it's the latter and just like Tesco let's hope he's open for business all hours!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Joe Cocker immortalized the song "You can keep your hat on" in 1986 so Professor:

"Go and do likewise!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

It's so important for a sub to look up to his dom especially if the dom is standing directly above him!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Kyle and Josh have always lived on the coast and have just enlisted in the Navy!

You might say that they are two seamen who love semen!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Tulips from Amsterdam!?

I know where I'd like to put my tulips/ two lips and it's not in a vase!"