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So close to telling a best friend

mccoyster

mccoyster

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If it would have been 3 years ago I would have never thought about telling sumone that I have same sex feelings for them but as time goes on I start getting more comfortable with the idea.

Im so close to telling my friend I have strong feeling for him and I really want to.
I fill u in on sum background,im a 20 year old bi male,Ive never told anyone I was bi,I talked to another friend about being bi once,I told him I could be bi and I think I really am and ofcourse he kept telling me Im not and I could have any girl I want. So I really think If I told my friends I was bi theyd say I'm just over reacting because Im still a virgin and feeling discouraged.Like I would love to tell everyone Im bi but ofcourse Im so worried they will be upset and weird around me.
Just recently on my myspace for my sexual orentation as NOT SURE,so maybe people will read that.

So about this friend. I have known him since July,The first moment I saw him I devolped feelings for him.Hes so beautiful.anyways,Im not a shy person at all so I started talking to him and everything and just being myself,so I get home and he already had put me in his friends on myspace.I thought that was crazy and started to think that he thinks Im cool.

So we talked to each other alot on myspace and everytime I would post a funny video,survey or sumthing HE'D post the same exact thing,which was more then twice. eventually he got my screen name and we started talking,We talk for HOURS at a time most of the time.When we talk we always end up saying homosexual things like I'll smack ur ass,I cant wait till u sleep over and we can dry hump,funny shit like that,only half the time I mean what I say and sumtimes I think he means it too,I really think he could be bi or bi curious,I dont think hes gay.
So one night while we were out walking I got injured and had to go to the hospital and he was right by my side the whole time and he was so upset that happend to me and he was so worried.So once I got home we layed down in my bed and watched tv and I dunno what come over me but I would kiss him on the cheeck every few mins and he never said stop or dude are u gay? Im pretty sure he liked it. Then later I made food and said if u want sum u gotta give me a kiss so he kissed me on the cheeck.

Im pretty sure if I told him I liked him he wouldnt freak out but Im so worried theres a chance he would freak out but I just cant keep it inside of me anymore,I really love this kid and I just wanna be with him,Ive never been in love or had any sexual contact with another person and I would really like to be with him. If I told him over the internet I could prob say everything on my mind but I kinda wanna tell him face to face but I'll be so nervious and scared.

So my question is what should I do? How should I bring it up? Should I even say anything? Do u think he could have the same feelings back for me?

Sorry aboyt my spelling,I suck at it. And Im greatful for any help. So thank u in advance. :cool:
 
I don't see then harm in you telling him your orientation. I do, however, think that maybe you should hold off on telling him how you feel for a bit.

Keep the little games going and see how things progress.
 
I agree with looseliam, definitely hold off on that L-word!! That word is powerful enough to drive some guys away if expressed too soon (or if expressed too late for that matter :eek:)
 
no straight guy would let you kiss them anywhere unless they are getting paid. i think this one is a keeper
 
true - kissing is not one of the actions frequently done guy to guy by confirmed straights. they can't go there. i hope you are able to come out to the guy though. that's good for you no matter what else
ding
 
Okay so what should be the first step,Should I tell him Im bi?
Show him the gay porn I have downloaded on my computer?
Wait till he brings up sumthing to do with homosexuality and then tell him about myself?
or just keep kissing him on the cheeck or hug him or flirt?
thanks for all ur advice so far,i really need it
 
I would tell him you're bi. Don't pussy-foot around the subject. No pun intended.

Then gauge his reaction. It'll let you know how things should proceed, if at all.

Frank Sinatra said it best: "Nice and easy does it, every time."

Best of luck!
 
Hmm, interesting. I think you should tell him you're bi first of all, see how he reacts. Especially knowing you've been kissing him, this will probably tell him at least that your into him more than a friend.

From there, he will react in one way or another: 1- he'll be okay with it to one of various degrees (from "hey that's cool with me" to "sex me up") or 2- various degrees of NOT being okay. The odds are in my opinion, that he'll more than likely be okay with it.
 
Okay,Im just not sure how to bring it up.
Unless I wait till be brings up being gay or bi.
But I just wanna tell him as soon as I can.
 
Ok, the next time you are watching TV, or a movie or out shopping, when you get the chance, if you see a goodlooking guy just say, "I think that guy is really good looking, I would do him" Say it in an off the cuff, matter of fact way, and see how your friend reacts. If he reacts negatively you can always say "I prefer girls but hey, swinging both ways is alright too" If he reacts possitively you can say "I think you are hot too" etc. Play it by ear.
I wouldn't recommend just hitting him with a statement as "I am gay" "I am bi" etc., that just forces him to react in someway, an off the cuff, matter of fact statement like the one above doesn't force him to say anything, and if he doesn't say anything...don't repeat it, he now knows where you are coming from.
 
Hey mate,

Well its obvious you guys are close...and given whats happened I'm sure he wont be surprised when you tell him...

Friendships are all about honesty and trust...relationships just take it one step further...and I'm not suggesting that thats what you should seek...yet.

But the same rules apply mate...honesty, trust and respect. You are obviously compassionate and the fact you want to be honest with him is a great thing...so just sit him down and tell him that you have something you want to share with him. That you trust him and value him and that you feel safe enough with him to tell him your secret. Just be honest with him...tell him you are bi. And then see how he reacts and where it goes from there.

But you need to just do it. Manufacture the time...when you are alone, when your watching a movie whatever... theres not going to be a sign fall from the sky to tell you when. This is a big enough deal for it to warrant a moment all of its own mate...you just have to say the words.

And I get the feeling you'll be glad you did.
 
Tonite i was out with other friends and we were talking about the friend I like,they told me that hes tellin them hes upset cause he thinks hes ugly and he wants a gf,so im going to talk to him and tell him sumthing like id date him or hes the best lookin kid i know
 
As I said before, I wouldn't rush into the "I like you" stuff, you can drop a line like "WTF you talking about, you're hot." See how he reacts.
 
Well Ive been talking to him for about an hour now and nothing really is happening.

weve been talking about not having alot in common,we said sumthing at the same time and he said i must read his mind and i said we know each others lives and he said but we must not be interested in them and i told him i was 100 percent intrested in his life and he interests me.
so then I asked him why hes so worried about getting a gf now and he said hes tired of being uncomfortable around everyone when they talk about theres do i told him how ive gone all my life without one and when people talk about there I just say a smart ass remark or change the subject.
so then he said well theres sumthing we have in common- no gf,and then i told l him i dont want him being unhappy and i told him i love him and he said he loved me back,even if we are complete opposites.

i even offered to help him find a gf and he said it would fail terribly,and i told him if he ever needs anyone to talk to he can talk to me and id try to help him no matter what.and he said hes not unhappy but that kinda shit is always on his mind.

I dont know what else to say..
 
You could perhaps have said that you have gone all your life without a girl or boy friend. Or said to him "If you were Bi I would fancy you" Just a light hearted, no threat, admission. You stand no chance unless you admit your orientation. I don't think he will react badly as long as he doesn't feel threatned, and even then, if he is straight, he will probably just say that he doesn't feel that way and hope that you don't missread him.

Good luck and go for it (*8*)
 
I think no matter what I say hes going to think im joking.
Like I just want to kiss him cause then he'll know forsure but i'll feel bad kissing him if hes not interested at all.
I just feel bad liking him,like I leave him message on the net or tell him on Instant MEssenger I like him and he never says anything back, I hope hes not scared,maybe hes nervious or gets quiet cause he likes me back?
i dunno folks
 
Look at him. Ask him if you may kiss him. It really is that simple!
 
Okay,that prob the best way to do this.
Hes comfortable with kisses on the cheeck so i think he'll be fine with a kiss on the mouth.
 
Go in for a little kiss. Watch his eyes and feel how his lips react. If the signs are good go back in and apply light tongue just to the lips.
 
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