...Like sands through the hourglass, so are the days of our lives...
I'm waiting for the evil twin.
On a more serious note, if you haven't said anything by now, you're not going to. You want guarantees you'll never get.
"the time was never right," is always code for being unwilling to take positive action. If you wanted him that badly, you'd have made the time, and if you were so convinced he was your "soul mate," you would have overcome your fear.
I suspect you're enjoying the angst and the drama - and that the indecision is less frightening than actually putting yourself out there to find a guy who's not all tied up in someone else's relationship.
Where do you see this going?
By the way, the idea that there is only one guy who is "perfect," for you is a particularly tired and shabby bill of goods. No guy is perfect, and there is more than one guy out there who you could have a successful relationship with.
So why all the doom and gloom over someone else's boyfriend?
Nothing to see here, move along.
I do have an evil twin btw...
"and that the indecision is less frightening than actually putting yourself out there"
well that part is true, I tell you that much. but it's just that the market over here is not so appealing to me, so I find it hard to actually get interested in a guy. they are just not interesting.
with this one, however, I have a really deep connection. and he knows it. boyfriend or no boyfriend, it doesn't really matter, I would probably feel the same if he was married with children. I don't know about you, but unfortunatly I cannot control who I fall for. it just happens.
I can however slowly let myself go from this infatuation, but I can't, not while he's feeling it too.
I just told him, not word for word but it was quite explicit, and he gently told me to find someone else. that I shouldn't let myself get stuck in this situation.
maybe is my inner dreamer, but I do refuse to do so because I know this guy and I know how he feels about our connection and him having a boyfriend. It's all too messed up for him to even consider making a move, so he doesn't and he just does nothing. I refuse. If I want him, then I want him and there's nothing I can do about it. I think time will tell if we're actually meant to have something other than our friendship or not. I just hope he'll come to his senses about his destructive long-distance relationship, even if that means I won't get nothing.
So yeah, I do dramatize because that's how I get when I feel something for someone. Maybe because I'm so eager to have a relationship, since I never had one. But surely you can't understand that point of view?
Thank you all for the patience.
