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Hope28

Hope28

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So this is my first post and I just wanted to get out here and say hi and just see if anyone knows what im going through. I have known for a long time that I like both men and women, but I have never let anyone know. Not that its anyone's business, but its just like idk, I feel like nothing should define me and im afraid that my family and friends would look at me different. Im the same person and idk, I feel paralyzed with fear. Today has been the worst because im overwhelmed with school, activities, life, and work. I feel like I just need someone to understand. !oops! I think im just really lonely, stressed out, and afraid of failure and rejection in general. ](*,) Well, just venting a little made me feel a little better.
 
First off, welcome to JUB! The posting section, anyway. :)

Secondly, yes, most of us feel that way at one time or another. That people are going to rubber-stamp us or put us into some category. But here's a little thing to keep in your brain. I found a design I loved so much, I put it on a T-shirt. I wish I could find the design now, darnit, but I can tell you what it said.

YOUR MISCONCEPTIONS ARE NOT MY PROBLEM

And this is true. People may believe you're a certain way due to your gender, your race, your age, your height, your economic status, your education, whatever. And there's nothing you can really do to stop them. But that doesn't mean you have to live by their misconceptions. Just be you. All of you. This additional bit of information ("I'm turned on by both men and women") shouldn't be enough to screw up your friendships. Certainly not the ones that count, anyway. :)

Don't rush to come out if you're not ready. Instead, take the time to get used to being bisexual. Embrace it, accept it. Once you're cool with it, other people with be cool with it, as well.

Best of luck to you! ..|

Lex
 
Hi there and welcome to JUB you will find many wonderful things here and wonderful people and I am glad you looked deep inside yourself and found your true identity thats what you have to do no who you are and don't let anyone change you because I am gay and I look at being gay or being bisexual as a gift from the heavens and you be proud of it and I would think that your family will always love you no matter what yes it might be a shock but time will show them the light and they will understand there is always a on going darkness in the lives of gay and bisexuals or anyone thats special and different but you are the one that can shed the light on your own life and everything will be ok I wish you the very best:-)
 
Welcome to JUB!!!

Just to let you know that you are most certainly not alone. This is a great website to talk all about your angst, love/relationships and of course your celebrity fantasties!!!

One thing I have learned through coming out to people is that it should not matter to others if you are gay/bi or not. If they like your personality, they will like you as a friend/lover or w/e. If they do not like you because you are gay/bi, then you probably do not want to associate with them.

Don't let the fear/paranoia get to you. Just be yourself and do what is natural.
 
Thanks alot for your replies. Sometimes I just need to vent and know that someone else knows what I mean when I say that Im afraid, lonely, and overwhelmed with life.
**wars** <- I like this smiley lol
 
Hope28,
Welcome to JUB!​
Enjoy your time here. You wll find there are several of us who give advice, freely and for free, and you will find some who are just good listeners.
You appear to be in a better place than you maybe think.
Do lot let yourself to get discouraged.
Shep+
 
Like you, I never felt it was anybody's business and I only came out to a few of my friends and it makes no difference to them. As far as everybody else goes, it's a non issue and none of their business. I don't question their lives outside of work, why would I volunteer info on mine.

Now if I was an outsider looking in and I noticed this guy who was employed for 12 years and never was close to anyone suddenly hanging out with a guy on a daily basis, taking off for 3 days at a time at the same time, I would bet my life's savings that those two guys were having a relationship but what purpose would it serve me to know?
 
A few addendums (addenda?).

>>>I think im just really lonely, stressed out, and afraid of failure and rejection in general.

You may be lonely in physical fact, but you've got plenty of support here in spirit. As far as fear of failure and rejection, totally normal. But try to resign yourself to the fact that you ARE human, you aren't perfect, and thus you will not succeed at absolutely everything you do. Sure, aim to succeed every time, but don't beat yourself up when you don't. Life is just a bunch of problems being handed at you one at a time, and as you solve them, you're gonna get better at making the right decisions, and get better at not letting the bad ones get you down. ..|

Lex
 
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