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Sometimes I get really flamboyant

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thefishinthesea23

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Not sure if this is the place to post this, but this is something I have wondered about myself for a while.

Sometimes when I am talking to people and get really excited I start doing all these flamboyant mannerisms. You know I start acting (forgive me for saying I just don't know the words) all gay, like stereotype gay. Limp wrists, sway of the hips, etc. Now I dont think there is anything wrong with that, but that is just not my usual self (I think).
For the most part my mannerisms are quite neutral (im having a hard time here trying not to use some awful words that I hate). Yet sometimes I find myself "acting" like this and I realize what I am doing and I suppress it.
Thats right I consciously make an effort not to act like that :(. I have no problem with other men acting like this, in fact I love their company, but when I do it it bothers me.

I wonder why I do this when it happens. Any one else gets this sort of thing?
 
thefishinthesea23 said:
Not sure if this is the place to post this, but this is something I have wondered about myself for a while.

Sometimes when I am talking to people and get really excited I start doing all these flamboyant mannerisms. You know I start acting (forgive me for saying I just don't know the words) all gay, like stereotype gay. Limp wrists, sway of the hips, etc. Now I dont think there is anything wrong with that, but that is just not my usual self (I think).
For the most part my mannerisms are quite neutral (im having a hard time here trying not to use some awful words that I hate). Yet sometimes I find myself "acting" like this and I realize what I am doing and I suppress it.
Thats right I consciously make an effort not to act like that :(. I have no problem with other men acting like this, in fact I love their company, but when I do it it bothers me.

I wonder why I do this when it happens. Any one else gets this sort of thing?
Click to expand...

Are you maybe afraid that it might bother other people around you, or draw too much attention to yourself/your sexuality? Seeing as you don't mind other people behaving in that way around you, it does seem a bit strange that you feel the need to repress it.
 
When you see other guys acting like that, do you think to yourself, "glad im not like that" or have some sort of anger toward them. Cuz sometimes what we dont like in others is cuz we see ourselves in them and could be a direct reflection of ourselves. Maybe subconciously you see yourself in those guys and dont like thinking you come across that way and thats why you try to curb it. imo.
 
People ought to celebrate themselves and take joy in being who they are. When it's genuine I find it charming. When it's forced, it's an act. What you are describing sounds like spontaneous eruptions of joyous freedom. Being gay and being ok with it means having freedom that the straight world doesn't even dream of. Don't you find what you describe as liberating? I do.

I think this has to do with the coming out process so let's leave any discussion right here.
 
I think that's lingering 'phobic crap in the back of your mind. We all had stuff like that in our heads that lingered long after we were out.

Be as flamboyant as you like, and try not to let it bother you.

You are fabulous just as you are, gestures and all.

Besides, how boring of a world would it be if all gay men were dumpy accountants from Duluth?
 
Wow all of you guys answers make a lot of sense. Ive accepted i am gay for a while and had boyfriends, but I dont go around telling everyone im gay. If they ask I sort of asses if I should tell the person or not (very rare I dont tell them).

Drunkenmoron: Yes I dont like calling attention to myself. I never have (unless its a guy I like hehe).

Jensu846: I have thought before, not always, but I know I have. I sort of feel bad about it now that I think about it. However I never felt anger toward anyone unless they are super obnoxious about it.

Seasoned: I have never really thought about how I feel on those moments, but if it happens when I am enjoying myself I suppose it must be a good thing. I will pay attention to this in the future.

TX-Beau - Accepting I was gay was hard due in part to the horrible opinion the society I was born in has of gays, including my family.

Hmm even know I find hard to view myself like that. I still have a lot to learn :(.
 
Hey, act how you want, if it feels natural and good go for it. There are lots of people in the world, trying to put everything down, a fun flamboyant person is great to be around, if thats naturally you, be that person and enjoy it. No role has to define you, just try and be who you are and when it bubbles to the surface let that inner beauty out. And if you are natural and funny and fun to be around, you won't be alone, and that a real achievement.

It takes time to know who you are and being gay is just another dimension, don't try and suppress a good bit.
 
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