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Straight but unsure...

what about this, what do you see here?
 

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Chances are if you found your way on JUB, there's a gay demon within. Haha
 
PepaeMango said:
what about this, what do you see here?
Click to expand...

Best photoshop ever. Just click "Edit…Make real…"

And then I see the dumbest pair of shoes ever. I swear I could be bisexual if only women didn't wear stupid shoes like that to bed.
 
blackbeltninja said:
That's a sad story. How recent was this? Have you tried to reconnect since?

-d-
Click to expand...

this was abot 2004/2005. I tried numerous times to get him to come and hang out with the boys, but he wont do it. still has me as a friend on facebook but everytime we are online at the same time, he wont speak to me. Soo.. All well.
 
Again thanks for all the support guys. And to all the picture responses... bro I see both haha how can you not see both. One has a dick staring you straight in the face, but admittedly I paid more attention to the girl.

Also just to clarify things, its not like I'm not turned on by girls. I am haha. A lot. I guess I'm turned on by guys too, though. But I don't think I could ever see myself in a relationship with one.

Anyway you all have been great. But also can you guys stop messaging me about pics and stuff? I should probably get that out there, I'm here for real advice, not a fuck buddy. ha
 
Two things:
1. Don't call your fraternity a frat. You couldn't call your country your cunt would you?

2. You need to find someone you trust to try and figure out these feelings. If nothing else then you gave it the "Ol' College Try!"
 
I would like to be ur friend buddy cause i have been there myself. But i have figured everything out now. I'd be glad to help...
 
Many guys are like you, and they marry, have a family BUT a few years into the marriage when the sex drive is less, they find themselves less able to perform with a woman and see themselves as gay. It is not fair to the girl to lead her into such a marriage. You need to resolve your sexuality now. You are not cheating on her, you are doing her a big favor.
Few if any are bi. But many young gays can perform with girls and vice versa. THE TEST for gay v. straight is what you are attracted to. What turns you on visually. I suggest that you do rent a lesbian video (no guys) and a gay one (no girls). See which turns you on. It should resolve the question for you better than any counselor can.
 
I know where you're coming from. I had the same thing. I have a friend I've known for a long time who is gay. We don't hook up for real. Cant dont live near each other, but we get busy online.

I still get hard quite easily with women, but wow our online hook ups are amazing.
 
Dude, you're a dude. That's who you are, what you are. You've got a cock, you want to stick it in people and do things until it feels really good.... and it doesn't really matter what their gender is. Just do it. If you don't find yourself attracted to certain types of guys, or girls, then stay away from them. Follow what makes you happy and what gets you off.

I'm the same as you. I like guys who are more like myself, a little more athletic, a little more masculine, guys that share the same likes as I do. I play sports, I work on cars, I've spent months on a fishing boat at sea with some of the hardest, roughest men I've ever known. I also like nice things and can appreciate art and culture, etc. I'm a plethora of types. But I don't let any of that "make me". I am who *I* want to be, not who others want or expect me to be based on "societal" rules. Fuck what society dictates as to who people "should" be or do. It's YOUR life. You have to live with it and your choices, not "society".

Do I think I have to apologize to guys or girls of certain types or physical make-up because I am not attracted to them? NO. Do I dislike them or "hate" on them because of that? NO. Live and let live. I just choose to live with those I want to live with..... You can do the same. Let your mind guide you and don't feel like you need to make excuses or hide things, otherwise doing that will keep you in the hole you're in now, forever. And as long as you have an attraction to guys, living in a predominantly heterosexual environment, i.e. super hetero fraternities, college athletics, etc. you are going to have a hard time being who you really are inside. And that is not healthy. I know, I did it too. I would do it differently if I had the opportunity again.

I think it's a lot of trouble about "labels". People seem to think they have to have a label or a name to accompany their sexuality. Thing is, I went there with that demon, and aside for the sake of things like posting in forums or identifying to others for specific reasons, I don't call myself out to anyone as straight or gay or bisexual. I'm just who I am.

I think if left alone I'd fuck everyone in the world, whoever, whatever. I'm just a horny guy, a sexual guy and I go with what is turning my crank at the moment. If it's a dude my own age, a more mature man, a hot chick at the bar, a hot married guy with his wife and family out in public somewhere, a hot older woman, married or single, -- whatever. If it makes my dick hard, then so be it. I don't let it define me. Keep in mind, I won't allow my attraction to the world to cause damage or harm to innocent others, but if there's no harm, no foul, then hey, I'M IN! HELL YEAH!

I am SEXUAL. That is what I am. That is WHO I am. Sure that's just looking at the sexual, physical side of it. There's the relationship side of it too -- and again, I don't go with anything that pigeon-holes me into a title or a label. I don't need or believe in that anymore. And I learned that once I removed from the mix all the stigmas and "types" that society seems to deem necessary, everything got MUCH easier.

When I began acting on my sexual attractions to guys, I was having a hard time dealing with it as far as wanting to be in a relationship with a guy. I just didn't think I could be in a gay relationship. I didn't think a guy would or could give me the things I needed, at least not based on my experiences up to that point in my life that I had had with girls. The whole family thing, wanting kids, being seen out in public as "together", etc. I knew it would be hard to do that with guys, but I really needed that in my life. So, I just thought guys would be for sex and women would be for sex and love.

NOT SO!!

I have found BOTH, great sex and awesome love, with males and females. I learned that it is possible for me to love a guy and want to be with a guy long-term, I just had to make it happen. No I'm not gonna say it was real easy to get through it all, but I did and I'm happy with it.

I was in a great relationship with a girl for a few years, but we parted ways, and it had NOTHING to do with my attraction to guys. It was just a relationship that didn't work out. I didn't end that relationship and go looking for a guy only, either. I was playing the field, dating around with guys and girls and not looking for anyone in particular. I figured when the next "right person" came around, I would know who they were because it would click, just like it always does when you "know" you've found the right person.

And I did. And he's a dude, and we're in love with each other and he's the greatest thing to happen to me yet. We don't hide who we are, we live our life just like everyone else does. We have the right to happiness, just like men and women do, just like women and women do.

To sum it up bro, I guess you just need to think things through, share and experience with others, stop hiding who you are or who you think you are. The world you're in right now is making you suppress what you feel inside, and that is never going to work out for you to allow you to BE.

No, you may not be able to change that right now, but try if you can. I did. I told my closest buds and my family that I did have an attraction to guys, as well as girls. I told them I didn't have a greater feel for one than the other, just whatever clicked for me. It wasn't easy, and not everyone was OK with it. I lost one friend over it, but then, if he was going to judge me on something as trivial as who I sleep with, I don't really think he was a friend to begin with, right?

Looking at pictures and seeing what gets you off is NOT going to determine your sexuality. YOU know who you are. You decide. Again, labels SUCK and labels are for the weak, in my opinion. Not knocking anyone who identifies as gay or straight or bisexual, not at all...... but the only reason we have labels is because that is what society makes us do. Imagine what a great world it would be WITHOUT LABELS?!! Imagine if everyone could just be who they are and be with who they want to?

And yes I have been called out by assholes who told me that I can't be just "sexual", I have to be one or the other - called out by gay people, straight people, etc. and ya know, fuck them. Who needs that shit? I feel sorry for those people who feel they have to worry about how I see myself and how I go about my life. Haters suck, but they hate because they're missing something and they're bitter -- so that's their problem to figure out. Not a weight on my shoulders.

So don't let people define you. YOU define you. Keep talking, keep the lines of communication open and find yourself. You can do it, and you'll be glad you did. Good luck to you brother, good luck!
 
** because of this kind of stupid time limit on editing a post, I was not able to make some changes at the end that I wanted to. So, this is the last few paragraphs, edited with what I wanted different. Mods can do whatever they need to do with it.
** Starting at third paragraph from the bottom of OP.

Looking at pictures and seeing what gets you off at that moment is NOT going to determine your sexuality. I have times when I am not attracted to women, times when I am not attracted to men. One switch is on, the other is off. I look at a hot guy with a hot bod and cock and it might not do a thing. Look at a hot chick, and INSTANT HARD ON. And vice versa. YOU know who you are, so YOU decide who you're going to be, not whether a picture or video gives you an erection. That's sort of labeling things again, in my opinion.

Labels SUCK and labels are for the weak, in my opinion. Not knocking anyone who identifies as gay or straight or bisexual, not at all...... The only reason we have labels is because that is what society makes us do. Imagine what a great world it would be WITHOUT LABELS?!! Imagine if everyone could just be who they are and be with who they want to without have to profess to being a certain "type". Would be a way cool world!

And just to add, yes, I have been called out by assholes who told me that I can't be just "sexual", I have to be one label or the other - Been called out by gay people, straight people, etc. and ya know what? FUCK THEM. Who needs that shit? I feel sorry for people who feel they have to worry about how I see myself in terms of sexuality and being, about how I go about my life. Haters suck, but they hate because they're missing something and they're bitter -- so that's their problem to figure out. Not a weight on my shoulders.

So don't let people define you. YOU define you. Keep talking, keep asking questions, find a support group that you're comfortable with, here, in the real world, etc. just keep the lines of communication open and find yourself. You can do it, and you'll be glad you did. Good luck to you brother, good luck!
 
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