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Straight friend hit on me

pmich25

pmich25

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So yesterday i was at one of my best friends place and we were drinking and smoking while playing Wii. We were having a great time...and then he mentioned how horny he was and was directing a lot of questions at me. He was questioning of whether or not to go "there". I just told him to relax and whatever he felt comfortable with. He was in such a horny state that he wanted something to happen. I had made a pass at him some 4 months ago under the same circumstances so i was in no state to try something again. I just said if he wanted something to happen to just pull me over. The conversation got pretty explicit taking about blowjobs and that he couldn't kiss but would maybe give me a handjob. It was quite hilarious. He pondered for bit thinking if he was bi and if he could do it. He was walking in and out of the room. In the end after 2 or 3 hours of talking nothing ended up happening which was probably best. I left around 3 in the morning and we chatted this morning and laughed about. We're now even since I made a pass at him months ago and he made a pass at me this time. I entail to rag on him about last night for a long time and told him that i now have the right to grab his ass whenever i wanted. He laughed soo hard.! I don't know if He seems to be struggling with it all or if it's just sexually frustration on his part lately.

Either way we can both joke about and told him that if anything happened it wouldn't be a big deal... (it obviously would be a slighter bigger decision for him though being with a guy but i don't think it'd change our friendship) But we're in a great place now since we've both now have made passes at one another so we can laugh about it. I don't suspect there to be another incident...and it's definitely best.

What a night i tell you!...
 
I get the feeling that your friend is very curious which is interesting. Its probably for the better that nothing happened between the two of you because it could have an impact on your friendship

Great story
 
I think he was just horny. Period. Good that it didn't go too far. I've had a couple similar experiences with straight friends. You've heard the old expression..."a hard dick has no conscience". Gay or straight, it's the truth. If he is truly straight and it had gone further, it would have impacted an otherwise great friendship. If it DOES happen again, then I would begin to wonder.
 
Drinking+Horny guys may make a straight guy do something he normally wouldn't. He is just horny, and when you get off you get off.

Of course some non-straight guys are too much in the closet, that they only get out and do what they really want when they are drunk. Just because this happenens with some not-straight guys, it doesn't mean if a guy gets drunk and gets his rocks off with a guy doesn't make him not-straight.
 
This actually isn't the first time he's said anything. One time he said "i want your cock"..accidentally (he tried to take it back..but couldn't..I heard him haha) (i wasn't sure if i heard correctly not so i passed it off as nothing).. but last night was a full fledged 2 hr conversation. sooo now i don't know what to think. All i know is that i'm not doing anything that he's not comfortable with. We're in a amazing spot now where we can joke about it... if anything happens it's up to him. It's probably best that nothing happens anyways because he mentioned today that he would probably been wierded out which would really SUCK! So glad it ended the way it did!!
 
Out of interest does he know you are Gay? But whatever it is good it turned out as well as it did.
 
I agree with these comments, it could definately affect your friendship if he isn't gay and then has reservations about what he did, he might want to avoid you because it would remind him of something he did that he wishes he hadn't. You made the right choice, and be careful the joking doesn't get him horny again, or you'll be back to square one. Good luck.
 
G'day pmich25,

Mate... you did exactly the right thing!!!! It would have taken some self control I'm sure but you couldn't have done better here if you tried!

Now your friend knows that hes not going to be judged, that he's got nothing to fear or feel ashamed about if he is curious or having doubts about his sexuality.

I get the drinking thing and being horny... but a lot of the time alcohol only lowers the walls...

So I'm guessing that theres the chance hes attracted to guys... Now he knows he can feel safe around you...he can trust you.

If nothing else happens hes got a friend in you that most of us would have given a right arm for at that stage of our lives!

Good on you mate!!!
 
I tend to think that he is definitely trying to come to terms with the fact that cocks appeal to him, but is still too wierded out but what that would mean to him and how he would have to view himself. I don't think that if something were to happen between you, it would necessarily harm your freindship, but it could. Buddy if he does this again, you are in a good position to help him through it. A big part of his accepting what occurred, would depend on how safe you make him feel. He might not want to be labeled gay or bi, even if it was pleasent for him. If you chide him he might not be comfortable with it. Right now you can joke around with him because nothing really happened, so he's not forced to see himself in a gay light yet. Plus there's the possibility that he's concerned that you might like him as more than a friend afterward and it might show in the presence of others, thus outing him in some way. Your buddy is definitely in his infancy with any homosexual feelings he may have. If you stay cool about it, and let him feel secure with you, he will surely let the issue mature over time. He might want to reinforce his feelings for women and swing to the far side for a while. All in good time my man. Your friend is a precious comodity. So few of us have a good one like you have. Be easy on him. And if you aren't ready to help him without having "issues of the heart" of your own, by all means stear clear of anything physical. Peace
 
First and foremost i'm just happy that nothing happened and affected our friendship. We're actually pretty close and chat every night it seems. I do think that he's wayy to wierded out by it and the "labeling" that he thinks that would come with it assuming something had happened. I'm pretty positive that he might be gay or bi and i intend to be the best friend i can be as he deals with all of it. I find joking about it all puts him and i at ease from saturdays' events.


Update: we chatted recently and were jokingly talking about it and he mentioned that i "outed him for a couple of hrs" lol...and also said that it could happen but it couldn't be a man-on-man...that he could probabaly do something if there were women involved...like an orgy. hahah

I guess "infancy" as IOSIF2 said would probably be the best way to describe his stage in all of this. He's mentioned a couple of times that i've been the first person to tempt him a few times...LOL..how flattering :)
 
Life is about taking risks. If something happens between you two, and it harms your friendship, so be it. I think you shouldn't prevent something from happening on the grounds that it might hurt your friendship.
But I think you handled it the right way, and that he should be the one to make it clear that he wants to try something sexual with you.
 
Well, I think you said it all when you said he admitted to being outed for a couple of hours. My gut says he won't wait for the female to come along. He just needed to hear himself say that to you; a feeble effort to stroke his hetero side. After all, you can't think that his comment about wanting you cock had anything to do with wanting it in the presence of a woman. His curiosity is will never let him off the hook until he follows through. It's cock he wants. He'll come after it soon enough. It's just a matter of time. Be patient and keep us posted with new developments. You are a lucky guy! Peace *|*
 
What i think it all boils down to is the fact that emotionally he's connected to me but cannot get over the fact that I'm a guy or it could simply just be sexual frustration on his part. We became really close after he and his gf broke up some 7months ago.

Quick Update: He invited me over for dinner today which was quite good and we played some more Wii. I completely kicked his ass today :)hahahaha No competition at all!

One major issue i neglected to mention is the fact that we work together. There simply, is a definite reason why nothing could ever happen. A major no-no. He's in and out of the office and calls me all the time and we chat nightly for a few hours so we spend an incredible amount of time together. We chat about girls and guys all the time but all in good fun. His curiousity seems to come into play more and more I find and I'm just gonna try and be a great friend.

(In case most of you were wondering - yes i would go there..but only on a sexual level....I would never date him)
 
You say that you'd be up for something sexual, but that you didn't want to date him. Ever think of telling him that? You can do it in the joking way that you guys have been talking lately to keep it mellow. Maybe that would make it easier for him to 'experiment' since the messing around would have no strings attached, and he could say to himself it was just a one time thing if that was a concern for him. Could be enough of a push for him to make a move.

I don't know - just an idea. :D
 
it sounds like you guys are already pretty close, and from my experiences with friends and sex is that sex can fuck up a friendship
 
My b/f was my best friend first. What a way to start a relationship, with someone that already shares your interests. You must be on the same wavelength if you talk nightly for hours. He has had no one in his life for 7 months. Just see where it goes, don't rush it. By the way, do you think it would be fun just to have sex with your best friend.
 
Update: So a coworker comes up to me and asks .."So is LB gay yet or what?" So many ppl think he's gay...and they know we hang out all the time.

So..anyways he seems to mention women a lot more lately.... (not shocking..haha)...haha but we still talk about guys... he's called me every day this week and called me again tonight. After talking for a bit he said he had to run but would call me from the car on the way to hockey (which he did)..lol (as if we're in a relationship i tell you..very cute)..haha

Anyways i have a habit of joking about his ass... He's got this cute bubble butt and i nicknamed him "BGB" - (baby got back)" haha Everytime we talk i have a habit of commentiing on it. He laughs about it...i think he loves it :)

I'm not going to rush anything....but i'm open to anything....i just want to make clear it doesn't affect what we have... i have to make sure he doesn't get freaked out by anything. I think sex with your best friend could be a good thing or a bad thing..what happens if it ends up awkward or just bad sex..haha WOW could you imagine the aftermath?!?! lol.. but a regular fuckbuddy would be great... he's a got a great ass :)

QUESTION: I find that he doesn't look me in the eye when we talk a lot. I don't sense anything really wrong..but like somethings' off. This was well before saturdays incident. it's . I'm justing curious cuz i think it's cuz the eyes are just soo revealing and tells more about a person than anything....what do you think it?
 
I think that he is probably very apprehensive about coming out (assuming he is gay, which I do based on what you have described), and he doesn't want to look you in the eye because he is afraid of coming out to you.

It seems that part of him wants to be with you, but there is another part of him that is holding him back.

If I were you I would debate the pros and cons of really confronting him about it. You could let what is be, but perhaps he wants you to come out with it and guide him.

Confusing situation though, and I wish you the best of luck.
 
Where's his eyes focusing if he's not looking in your eyes when you talk? Sounds like he is dealing with many levels of internal questions, but completely trust you while he is sorting it out.
 
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