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Straight Friend

hanzosword

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I just need somewhere to vent about my straight friend whom I'll just call B. I'm 33, gay, only out to a few people and B is 21, straight and just moved to my town about 7 months ago. We met on this online app where we both talked about some weird dreams we had and we hit it off. He was new in town and didn't know anybody so we started hanging out. We added each other on Facebook and I thought he was pretty cute and he seemed like a nice guy. He was cool and mature for being so young.

He asked if I was straight before we met and I told him I'm gay. I thought he as some kind of homophobe for asking but it turned out one of his best friends was gay and he just wanted to make sure I knew it wasn't a date or anything. When we met in person I thought his facebook pictures didn't do him justice and that he was really good looking. I thought to myself if we become friends he'll be the best looking one I ever had lol!

This was about 6 months ago and we have become super close since then. We tell each other everything and we just told each other we love each other a few days ago for the first time. We talk and or hang out almost everyday and I love spending time with him. I told him I miss him when he's away and he spent the next 2 days hanging out with me all day as if to say he feels the same. He is the sweetest guy I ever met but we only love each other as friends.

If there was some small chance that he was attracted to me my platonic love could explode into romantic love but I'm keeping it at bay. He does little things that make me think he could possibly like me more than a friend, like he always sits really close to me, he looks me deep in the eyes when he talks to me without looking away, he stares at me sometimes when he thinks I don't notice, he talks to his parents and other friends about me, he'll pay for my food when we go out to eat even though he knows I make more than he does. He just did that the other night and didn't want to let me pay him for it.

I guess I just wished that even though he loves women and hasn't been with one in a while that he would try things out with me, a man, someone he already loves in a platonic way. Thanks to anyone who read all of this lol.
 
I totally get where you are coming from, but I think you just keep it how it is for now and let him see that he can trust you and don't push things. He is young, and maybe he will get to the point where he wants to experiment, and if that happens it would probably be with you where you guys are such good friends, but you need to accept the fact that if he is straight, and it sounds like he is, that may never happen. Feel lucky that you have a great friend and find your action somewhere else. Good luck.
 
It may or may not happen . Don't do anything stupid. If he wants to take it to the next level it should be when he wants to.Which do you value more sex with him or the friendship? If you two do go there, have a talk with him .
 
You're friendship is at stake. Let him make the first move, that will relive the tension and pressure on both of you. Best friends are friends, for starters.
 
Thanks for your reply Junior42 and I agree. I won't pursue anything with him and I'm so lucky to have him in my life. I respect his straightness and I only playfully tease him sometimes about experimenting or whatever.
 
It may or may not happen . Don't do anything stupid. If he wants to take it to the next level it should be when he wants to.Which do you value more sex with him or the friendship? If you two do go there, have a talk with him .

Oh I respect him and love him way too much to every try anything with him. If anything ever did happen with him he would have to initiate it. He's actually had a few mmf threesomes with friends but he's still not into guys. One friend of his who was bi started sucking him during one when he was really drunk and he pushed him off of him. He trusted me enough to tell me this and I asked if he was sure he wasn't bi curious and he says he's not at all. I tease him about it sometimes lol. I think mmf threesomes are somewhat gay but he swears he sees it differently lol.
 
You're friendship is at stake. Let him make the first move, that will relive the tension and pressure on both of you. Best friends are friends, for starters.

Of course. I would never make a move on him but if he did I would go all in. I love him first and foremost and want him to be happy. I'm not quite in love with him but a move from him could change that really quick.
 
I understand where you are coming from. Similar situation with a friend of mine. Love each other, known him for 10 years. He is straight.
 
I understand where you are coming from. Similar situation with a friend of mine. Love each other, known him for 10 years. He is straight.

I see. I accept his straightness but some small part of me still hopes that he'll fall for me and we could live happily ever after. We spend so much time together but I need to make more effort to find some romance of my own.
 
Oh I respect him and love him way too much to every try anything with him. If anything ever did happen with him he would have to initiate it. He's actually had a few mmf threesomes with friends but he's still not into guys. One friend of his who was bi started sucking him during one when he was really drunk and he pushed him off of him. He trusted me enough to tell me this and I asked if he was sure he wasn't bi curious and he says he's not at all. I tease him about it sometimes lol. I think mmf threesomes are somewhat gay but he swears he sees it differently lol.

That right there almost makes me think he really isn't even slightly bi at all, But... I know I was always scared to do anything with a guy i guess mostly cause i didn't know what my friends would think of me and i wouldn't want my parents to know...
I have been Bi couious since i was around 20 myself just never acted on it...
if i had ever been in a MMF 3 some and a dude started to suck me i would let him keep sucking me however. I think... I would say i would but maybe the male who was doing it was a friend? or maybe he was a dude who knew his other friends and maybe he was like me didn't want anyone to find out..

Sounds like you two have a great friendship and maybe you should keep it at that... I used to have a couple of gay friends who was married. I went to there wedding. there were very cool and threw awesome party's.
good luck on whatever happens
 
Last year, my then 26 y.o. bf's best friend from elementary and I could not stand one another. He blamed me for making his "brother" gay, and I just hated his meth addiction and resultant behaviors. I am a manager at a casino, and I kicked him out a few times for semi-panhandling (selling anything that would be bought). Flash-forward to today, he is 382 days clean, and now he is my best friend; we text every day. Maybe it's my education in psychology or just trustful being, but he has divulged everything to me including his molestation. His "brother" after coming out of the closet hit on him every chance he got, but he never went there, instead for some reason or another choosing me.

Sorry, supposed to be helping you, but we find solutions in others' similar quandaries. We have exchanged blow jobs since, but he is adamant that we will never have a relationship. So, maybe that is a cue to you; I'd go for it, but that's just me. Tasting a cock is just tasting a cock ... it has just served to cement the friendship I have now.

If you enter it with no expectations, it will be wonderful. With me, it's just weird, because my newfound best friend is obsessed with his "brother's" penis size (which is huge). Our first encounter consisted of him just blowing me, despite his best efforts to subjugate me. I've never been a size queen, so he's perfect.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
 
That right there almost makes me think he really isn't even slightly bi at all, But... I know I was always scared to do anything with a guy i guess mostly cause i didn't know what my friends would think of me and i wouldn't want my parents to know...
I have been Bi couious since i was around 20 myself just never acted on it...
if i had ever been in a MMF 3 some and a dude started to suck me i would let him keep sucking me however. I think... I would say i would but maybe the male who was doing it was a friend? or maybe he was a dude who knew his other friends and maybe he was like me didn't want anyone to find out..

Sounds like you two have a great friendship and maybe you should keep it at that... I used to have a couple of gay friends who was married. I went to there wedding. there were very cool and threw awesome party's.
good luck on whatever happens

Yeah you may be right about that. The guy in the threesome was a friend of his who was bi and used to date his best friend. My friend was super drunk and pushed the guy off of him. He's so nice though that he didn't get mad at him. I have no plans on trying to get with my friend though. In a perfect world it would happen naturally with the ball in his court. It's fine though.
 
Thanks for your reply. The brother coming onto the brother is quite interesting. I get it though. I was kind of attracted to a cousin before when I was younger plus I was pretty lonely at the time and he was the only one I was hanging out with.

If my friend came onto me in any way I would be down for it in a heartbeat but I would tread carefully since I would hate to lose him as my friend. He's such a sweetheart though that I doubt he would let that come between us if that did happen. I'm not holding my breath waiting for that to happen though.
 
Lol ... well, my "straight" friend, Joey is in county lock-up awaiting sentencing on multiple charges; prison time is inevitable, but we won't find out how long until next month. Just in time for his "brother" to be getting out of his 20-month long sentence in prison. I've maintained contact with Will (or Willow, as he now prefers to be called) since he went into big house. Somehow or another, despite weekly phone calls, we've been able to maintain a minimum of twice-a-week 6+ pages of written correspondence. Willow has his bachelors in psychology, and he is shocked that it is so truly bad out here per the Covid-19 pandemic. He was so looking forward to eating at Olive Garden, and I had to tell him that all restaurants are shut down, and that he'll be lucky to find a drive-thru.

I told him about me and Joey, and he laughed saying, "I knew it!" Apparently, but never in front of me, Joey went from calling Willow, "brother" and started berating him with "sister," "cunt," or "woman." Just because I never got into the whole meth scene doesn't make my poop not stink, but I am not in criminal or even traffic court, lol. I offered to drive down the 3.5 hour long drive to pick him up upon his release on Tuesday, but his mom already filled out the paperwork. Even written word and on the phone, Willow has asserted that he is driving straight into violation as soon as he is released - he's driving to me and not a drug dealer, and despite him being 30, apparently, he needs his P.O.'s approval to date anyone.

Joey's new fiance, lol, he got married the last time he spent a year in county and that fizzled; now he has two kids with two baby mamas, ha ha, any way, she called me (our Joey gave her my cell number). Trying to make nice with me saying, "I know you two love one another, I see the way you look and laugh at one another." As she's posting on all social media that she's engaged, and women are posting in response snap shots of Joey's texts trying to put the "Hey baby" on them. She wanted me to drive her up north 2 hours to visit him; our small county jail has housed him elsewhere. Lol ... she only truly knows about us, because dumb Joey let her use his phone when he was locked up in another county for shoplifting of all things (a pack of gum). She got to see 3 of the self-nudes (out of like 50) that he'd sent me and specifics of our hook-ups: my house, hotel, road head, lol, or to her shock, letting me fuck him up the ass on the side of the highway, if I wanted.

As was the case 3 years ago, our Joey screams his heterosexuality from the rooftops of the world proposing to his second fiance. Silly Liz knows the truth from Joey's phone and all social media, yet she's accepted. My poor Willow has claimed to have been only raped once while in prison (idk if I believe that or not), but I fear for Joey with his smartass mouth. Lol ... he spent sixty cents to respond to both mine and Willow's letters with a one-page answer, no heading or closing, just "Fuck off." Ha ha, we'll see how he feels in a month or two.
 
Although the age difference between 33 and 43 is only minimal, the age difference between 33 and 21 is huge. A 21 year old is only just acquiring life skills. Even if he were bi curious I'd leave it alone.
 
Okay, weird. My lover (ex-boyfriend) just got out of prison, just as his "brother" (best friend) is going into the "Big House." Despite the pandemic, of course, we hooked up and honeymooned for 4 days and 3 nights in every imaginable Kama Sutra position imaginable! I get home (51 miles from his motel room), and he calls that he is in a nearby town trying to buy a used truck. He was also trying to hook up with Liz, our Joey's baby mama. I was LIVID!!! She even texted me that she was going to fuck him just so I'd know what it felt like to be cheated on.

Thankfully, Liz doesn't have a license or car, and Will's truck purchase fell through. I could handle the cheating, as we are still not technically engaged. I showed him a picture of the rings that I bought with my refund, but we're taking it slow. Lol ... we were naked, walking about the motel room when I showed him the pic, and he got hard in a nano-second!!! Gawd, I LOVE his penis!!! Of course, I don't want him cheating, but he has this whole bi thing that he wants to get out of his system. So, just as long as he stays away from meth (which he went to prison for), I suppose I can allow an infidelity or two. Lol ... he got so jealous when I hooked up with Sam 5 weeks before his release. Ha ha, so much for an open-relationship ... apparently, that only applied to him.
 
You're friendship is at stake. Let him make the first move, that will relive the tension and pressure on both of you. Best friends are friends, for starters.

I understand where you are coming from. Similar situation with a friend of mine. Love each other, known him for 10 years. He is straight.


^ this - I'm the least qualified to answer your question, but these two guys have nailed it
 
Well, Will and Liz hooked up, and he moved into her ramshackle hovel. I was called via teleconference yesterday asking me to join them for a 3-way. Not that I am embarrassed, but I was mad that Will shared my nude pix with her without my permission. Yes, both Will and I are bigger and thicker than Joey, but that is beside the point. I thought that Willow and I were actually going to make a true go of this this time. Yet, he claims that he is ONLY 30 and wants to have more kids. Well, Liz is 33, had 5 kids, but custody of none ... still a fertile Myrtle. He could do so much better, but maybe he felt that was just settling for me too. I am genuinely hurt, but ultimately, I do want him to be happy ... so I can turn him away in a few months when he comes to his senses. There is no way in HELL that I am taking Liz's secondhand boy toys. Sure, Joey is the exception to that rule, but he and I were having funzies with one another for over a year before they hooked up; he needed her as a beard, and Miss Fertile got pregnant with his second child.

Joey called my land line this afternoon when my son and I were out taking a walk. He's calling from county jail, and my sister was here to accept the call (phone card and not collect). His message was, "Liz is expletives repeatedly, blah, blah, blah biscuit whore. He loves me, and to piss off Liz and Will, if I wanted, he'd be my boyfriend publicly. Lol ... now I know this is just retaliatory, but I am tempted, ha ha.

Sure, the sex was / is always phenomenal between us, but I fear it was just so, because it was taboo and hidden from the world. I have a masters degree, and he barely graduated high school (had to attend summer school his senior year). I could go on over further differences, but I am trying to keep my head about myself. This whole scene is dramatic, and I'd rather not be part of it, but I am. Liz saw the nudes that Joey sent me. Liz knows that Will and I were a couple for years. Joey just wants to hurt both of them ... am I willing to play the pawn?

I guess I will find out today, as Joey is going to call me again at 2:00 p.m. Don't get me wrong, I love, Love, LOVE Joey to the core of my being, but he is just not long term boyfriend material for me. I, too prefer the secret taboo love relationship without commitment. We'd lay for hours afterwards with our naked bodies intertwined bitching and talking about everything under the sun. We are totally comfortable with one another, but I fear that he is NOT dad material for my son, and we are a package deal.

I could so use him, but I shan't. He got his $1200 stimulus + $2500 for Liz's 5 kids that he claimed on his taxes. Being in county lock up, there is only so much one can spend on canteen products. I want to wash my hands of the entire situation, but I'd be dishonest if I tried to claim that I wasn't obsessed with his beautiful, perfect 5.5" cut cock and tight ass. Ugh ... this is my life during Covid-19.
 
Yeah you may be right about that. The guy in the threesome was a friend of his who was bi and used to date his best friend. My friend was super drunk and pushed the guy off of him. He's so nice though that he didn't get mad at him. I have no plans on trying to get with my friend though. In a perfect world it would happen naturally with the ball in his court. It's fine though.

I totally respect that you're taking the high road with respect and integrity, but also keeping an open mind. Also, every dynamic/friendship is different. What might be fine for the last poster here might not be fine in your situation with regards to the individual, the boundaries, and the dynamics of the friendship. It sometimes takes a super strong friendship to be FWB. Depending on the individual, they might be able to compartmentalize - or not - at which point, there's no backing up the bus, and the friendship is ruined.

I have fallen for four straight friends in my lifetime. I never tried anything with the three, and they are all really good friends, to this day with at least 20-30 years of friendship with each of them. The one friend I fooled around with was married, and we are no longer friends.

You are blessed to have a great friend.
 
Ugh! I received my first letter from "Husband" today, and the NO proper spelling, grammar, syntax, punctuation, or even paragraphs were painful from what I could decipher from his chicken scratch of penmanship. Poor sweet Joey tried to talk dirty ("taking it up the as 4 u"), and he wants me to devote a couple of pages of "jak of martel" in my next letter. Lol ... even his live-in baby-mama is asking me to keep her in the loop (even if not sexually).

I got a letter that read, "Dear Sam, (only punctuation until the end of his 3-page hieroglyphics that ended with a "Love, husband." the last two punctuations). One HUGE run-on sentence that I get to decipher for days, and I am far from an anthropologist or archeologist! It's his b-day on Sunday, so, I'd better write something today for tomorrow's mail.
 
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